jocko's cowboy boots

[jocko]

ol jocko always wanted a pair of authentic cowboy boots, so, seeing some on sale, he bought them and wore them home.

Walking proudly, he sauntered into the kitchen and said to his wife, "Notice anything different about me?"

Margaret looked him over. "Nope."

Frustrated, jocko stormed off into the bathroom, undressed and walked back into the kitchen completely naked except for the boots.

Again he asked Margaret, a little louder this time, "Notice anything different NOW?"

Margaret looked up and said in her best deadpan, "jocko", what's different? It's hanging down today, it was hanging down yesterday, it'll be hanging down again tomorrow."

Furious, ol jocko yelled, "AND DO YOU KNOW WHY IT'S HANGING DOWN, MARGARET?"

"Nope. Not a clue", she replied.

"IT'S HANGING DOWN, BECAUSE IT'S LOOKING AT MY NEW BOOTS!!!!"

Without missing a beat Margaret replied, "Shoulda bought a hat, jocko. Shoulda bought a hat."

[jocko]

well what are u??

Are you a Democrat, Republican or Southerner ? - You Choose


Here is a little test that will help you decide.

The answer can be found by posing the following question:

You're walking down a deserted street with your wife
and two small children.

Suddenly, a Terrorist with a huge knife
comes around the corner,
locks eyes with you,
screams obscenities,
raises the knife, and charges at you...

You are carrying a
Kimber 1911 cal. 45 ACP, and you are an expert shot.
You have mere seconds before he reaches you and
your family.
What do you do?

THINK CAREFULLY AND
THEN SCROLL DOWN:

Democrat's Answer:
· Well, that's not enough information to answer
the question!
· What is a Kimber 1911 cal. 45 ACP?
· Does the man look poor or oppressed?
· Is he really a terrorist? Am I guilty of profiling?
· Have I ever done anything to him that would
inspire him to attack?
· Could we run away?
· What does my wife think?
· What about the kids?
· Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and
knock the knife out of his hand?
· What does the law say about this situation?
· Does the pistol have an appropriate safety built into it?
· Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what
kind of message does this send to society and to my children?
· Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me?
· Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he
be content just to wound me?
· If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could
my family get away while he was stabbing me?
· Should I call 9-1-1?
· Why is this street so deserted?
· We need to raise taxes, have paint & weed day.
· Can we make this a happier, healthier street
that would discourage such behavior.
· I need to debate this with some friends for a
few days and try to come to a consensus.
· This is all so confusing!

Republican's Answer:

BANG!


............ ......... ......... .........
......... ......... ......... .....

Southerner's Answer:

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
BANG ! BANG! BANG! BANG!
Click..... (Sounds of reloading)
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
BANG!
BANG!
BANG!
Click

Daughter: 'Nice grouping, Daddy!'
'Were those the Winchester Silver Tips or Hollow Points?!

Son: 'Can I shoot the next one?!'

Wife: 'You are NOT taking that to a Taxidermist

[QuercusMax]

:D

There certainly is a difference between the 3 types.





Southerner's Answer:

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
BANG ! BANG! BANG! BANG!
Click..... (Sounds of reloading)


And it seems those southern boys can squeeze more rounds into their Kimber mags than I can get into mine; wonder how they do it? Or perhaps they also have a different way of counting??? :)

[Sliebl]

ol jocko always wanted a pair of authentic cowboy boots...

Thanks, Jocko, I needed that this morning! :w00t:

[AJBert]

That thar is funnay sTuff!!!11

As a registered independant living in the deep South, I know where I fit in, regardless of where I may live in the future!

[Deano]

That's a lot of bangs. Are you sure he wasn't carrying a glock? Good stuff

[gb6491]

:D
...And it seems those southern boys can squeeze more rounds into their Kimber mags than I can get into mine; wonder how they do it? Or perhaps they also have a different way of counting??? :)
Probably one of those old polymer, double stack Kimbers (BP10, Polymer Custom, etc.) with a downloaded 13 or 14 round mag.:biggrin1:
Regards,
Greg