blind date (almost) - help needed

[CJB]

I"m in deep deep crap.

Ok folks - I'm meeting up with a gal I've been interested in since I first laid eyes on her. I wont go into specifics, but we met ONCE, at a biker event, for like 5 minutes two years ago. Got her email, etc. Have sparsely conversed since then via email and a few texts. We DO share many of the same interests... which makes her interesting to me.

So... we have decided to meet up in Daytona, as she lives close to there, for the biker event. We'll probably spend a good bit of time together.

Here's my problem. Although we have a "date" planned with other folks attending, I thought it might be nice to bring her a small gift. Something not expensive, something... universally ok and socially acceptable... I dunno. I'm just old school, but when I go visit someone, I always bring a little something for them.

My first inclination is to bring some cheep bourbon and a six pack of condoms. As you can see... I'm totally clueless.

HELP!!!!!! And I'm serious here..... jeeze guys... MELISSA!!!!! HELLLPP!!!!

[Bawanna]

I know the Lotts, J and JD are big into them Teddy Bears. Can't remember the name but a specific something Teddy Bear.

Something not to committed but let her know you've put some thought into your meeting up again.

The cheap bourbon me thinks ain't such a good plan.

[CJB]

Those Vermont bears are EXPENSIVE for a little "thinking of you" gift as a first time thing.

For the $79 price tag, I could a bottle of Wild Turkey, and two hookers!

I like the concept... but the cheep bears are really ... just kids stuff.

[Bawanna]

Didn't realize they were so expensive, never took their advice and bought one myself.

[Starbug]

Do you guys live in seperate states? If so, perhaps a souvenir from your state? Or, you can never go wrong with flowers, a single rose or something. Or, if she collects a certain item, say for instance Golden Retriever related items, you could find a small glass figurine of a Golden.

As an example, I was courted with strawberry smoothies. He brought them to my workplace every day. I LOVE strawberries. It worked.... I'm about to marry him now. Lol.

I hope these ideas help. :-)

[FatMatt]

One word..... Flowers! But not a dozen of red roses, just an nice collaboration of mixed flowers should bring out that smile... And that's all you need at first.

[OldLincoln]

Since it's a bike event, why not wait until you are there and strolling around together and if you think you are interested get a trinket souvenir at the event as your "first date". Buy it together as a couple thing.

Trinket doesn't mean a full size chrome bumper but something like a bracelet charm that commemorates the event. You never know, 10 years from now she may show it to you and say "remember our first date?"

PS: I met my wife on a blind date and we've been together over 46 years.

[downtownv]

Since it's a bike event, why not wait until you are there and strolling around together and if you think you are interested get a trinket souvenir at the event as your "first date". Buy it together as a couple thing.

Trinket doesn't mean a full size chrome bumper but something like a bracelet charm that commemorates the event. You never know, 10 years from now she may show it to you and say "remember our first date?"

PS: I met my wife on a blind date and we've been together over 46 years.
Yeah like those H-D Crotchless Panties they sell along with a pair of Harley Handcuffs (Both very practical as well) No really, Harley sell a Harley Teddy Bear if teddy bears are what you're thinking and she's into motorcycles. My wife always went for the Harley Davidson Diamonds or any other brand....

[Tinman507]

One single rose. Preferably not red.
anything beyond that screams Desperado.

[jocko]

I"m in deep deep crap.

Ok folks - I'm meeting up with a gal I've been interested in since I first laid eyes on her. I wont go into specifics, but we met ONCE, at a biker event, for like 5 minutes two years ago. Got her email, etc. Have sparsely conversed since then via email and a few texts. We DO share many of the same interests... which makes her interesting to me.

So... we have decided to meet up in Daytona, as she lives close to there, for the biker event. We'll probably spend a good bit of time together.

Here's my problem. Although we have a "date" planned with other folks attending, I thought it might be nice to bring her a small gift. Something not expensive, something... universally ok and socially acceptable... I dunno. I'm just old school, but when I go visit someone, I always bring a little something for them.

My first inclination is to bring some cheep bourbon and a six pack of condoms. As you can see... I'm totally clueless.

HELP!!!!!! And I'm serious here..... jeeze guys... MELISSA!!!!! HELLLPP!!!!

her the new cvo BREAKOUT. U know it about like buying a gun for an armless woman, hell she can't shoot it so u might as well just keep it and shoot itl. Its the thought that counts.

Or buy her a quart of Goldwhiher wild turkey (15 parts lemonade, one part wild turkey).

Just sayin

[jocko]

I"m in deep deep crap.

Ok folks - I'm meeting up with a gal I've been interested in since I first laid eyes on her. I wont go into specifics, but we met ONCE, at a biker event, for like 5 minutes two years ago. Got her email, etc. Have sparsely conversed since then via email and a few texts. We DO share many of the same interests... which makes her interesting to me.

So... we have decided to meet up in Daytona, as she lives close to there, for the biker event. We'll probably spend a good bit of time together.

Here's my problem. Although we have a "date" planned with other folks attending, I thought it might be nice to bring her a small gift. Something not expensive, something... universally ok and socially acceptable... I dunno. I'm just old school, but when I go visit someone, I always bring a little something for them.

My first inclination is to bring some cheep bourbon and a six pack of condoms. As you can see... I'm totally clueless.

HELP!!!!!! And I'm serious here..... jeeze guys... MELISSA!!!!! HELLLPP!!!!



quoteMy first inclination is to bring some cheep bourbon and a__ six pack of condoms-__. As you can see... I'm totally clueless

6 pack of condoms. what the hell u gonna bring some friends along????Just sayin I've seen ur photo CJB, :

somewhere around here I have my 100th anniversay Harley Stieff bear..

[CrabbyAzz]

Since it's a bike event, why not wait until you are there and strolling around together and if you think you are interested get a trinket souvenir at the event as your "first date". Buy it together as a couple thing.

Trinket doesn't mean a full size chrome bumper but something like a bracelet charm that commemorates the event. You never know, 10 years from now she may show it to you and say "remember our first date?"

PS: I met my wife on a blind date and we've been together over 46 years.

This would be the best idea. Something to remember the occasion. At this point your just friends meeting up to see if you click. I would also suggest you make advance reservations at a nice restaurant, so your not stuck bumbling around looking for cheap food .

[jocko]

Since it's a bike event, why not wait until you are there and strolling around together and if you think you are interested get a trinket souvenir at the event as your "first date". Buy it together as a couple thing.

Trinket doesn't mean a full size chrome bumper but something like a bracelet charm that commemorates the event. You never know, 10 years from now she may show it to you and say "remember our first date?"

PS: I met my wife on a blind date and we've been together over 46 years.

I metmy first wife on a blind date: Course she was blind. Just sayin

I bought her a 5 year subscription to Playboy magazine on our first anniversary..

[muggsy]

I metmy first wife on a blind date: Course she was blind. Just sayin

I bought her a 5 year subscription to Playboy magazine on our first anniversary..

My wife wasn't blind when I met her, but she wore really strong glasses. I talker her into taking them off. She looked better to me without them and I definitely looked better to her without them. The relationship has lasted 40 years. I ain't no Don Juan, Jocko, but I'd stick with your original idea. Cheap bourbon and a six pack of condoms. If she doesn't knock you down at least you'll know where you stand. (Advice given in the same spirit as the question asked.) :)

[CJB]

6 pack of condoms. what the hell u gonna bring some friends along????Just sayin I've seen ur photo CJB, :


Well last trip to Daytona with this one:

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v214/bandersnatchreverb/Leesburg%202012/th_HPdance.jpg (http://smg.photobucket.com/albums/v214/bandersnatchreverb/Leesburg%202012/?action=view&current=HPdance.mp4)

It resulted in two of those six packs being used, in three days.... !~

But, thankfully, she has herself a full time boy-friend now!

[CJB]

I think tho....

I like the single flower idea, but its totally impractical on two wheels.

She and I share certain artistic interests.... someone judge this call of mine....PLEASE

I shall attempt to appeal to her strong artistic leanings, which include photography. Thought a Cafe-Press mug... something along the artsy-photography genre... Leica type of thing (which is the camera of choice for the artsy-fartsy crowd). Just a mug... its benign, yet the imprint will show that I chose it for her. I dunno... don't want to overstep, or understep. A gift is not essential I suppose.

Open to suggestions! Jeeez.... this is not supposed to be a truly "romantic" encounter, it was not planned as such. What we have is more of... being mutual persons of interest, who want to get to know each other better - and I get the feeling from her texts and emails, that she is leaving possibilities open, as am I.

~~~

As an aside..... I'm enjoying this all, while hating it too. I am self restrained... choosing NOT to speak to her on the phone, but using e-means of communication instead, letting a first re-meeting being something anticipated to its maximum extent.
Which means, I'm probably playing mind games with myself.... and will be sorely let down, but ya know... its not from lack of trying.

[yqtszhj]

I was thinking the single rose like Tinman but thought the same thing about it not working on 2 wheels. I'm completely lost now since I'm not too good at that stuff... if you don't believe me just ask my wife. We've been married 25 years and I'm still not good at it.

OH... I did get her an Ipad for our anniversary and she did really like that. I think that's the first correct thing I have done in at least a year.

[PYROhafe]

Ok... just my .02 here... Get the coffe mug that links your interests together, (shows thoughtfulness and a connection) and cut the stem off a rose (yellow, white, pink.. whatever, just not red) and stick the flower down inside the coffee cup. That way it can survive the 2 wheel adventure, and be very discreet at the same time when you hand over the mug.

[Tinman507]

I think tho....

I like the single flower idea, but its totally impractical on two wheels.

A florist will package it in such a way that makes it practical on 2 wheels.
http://www.worthyswholesale.com/product_images/g/553/CW-220_Small_Single_Rose_Box__21514_zoom.jpg

She may share many of your interests, but she is still a woman. Women like to be near pretty things. And your thoughtfulness (2 wheel rose) will score large points.

[CJB]

Well, I just spent a few hours looking all over the net....

Here's what I came up with -

Something to appeal to "togetherness" in a way.
Something to appeal to the artistic nature
Something to appeal to naked male and female figures...
Something timeless, yet modern
Something which might appeal to her feminist nature

Found a set of Vitruvian Man / Vitruvian Woman mugs.

The male figure the classic DaVinci, the female one a modern female homage.

Thoughts folks?

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v214/bandersnatchreverb/vitruvian_woman_mug.jpghttp://img.photobucket.com/albums/v214/bandersnatchreverb/da_vinci_vitruvian_man_mug.jpg

[TucsonMTB]

Found a set of Vitruvian Man / Vitruvian Woman mugs.

Meh! . . . Probably safer to go with a mixed bouquet of flowers, despite my earlier suggestion that you get something you would like.

But, hey, if you really like the mug . . . follow your heart.

Better to get shot down in flames for being honest than for offering something out of character. ;)

[jocko]

I still say buy her the Breakout and forget about hurting her feelins.

[jdlott74]

Those Vermont bears are EXPENSIVE for a little "thinking of you" gift as a first time thing.

For the $79 price tag, I could a bottle of Wild Turkey, and two hookers!

I like the concept... but the cheep bears are really ... just kids stuff.

Exactly...Vermont Teddy start at like $80.00-$90.00 for the basic bear, NOTHING on it. If you're just starting to date her I wouldn't do the Vermont Teddy Bears. Those are for special occasions, birthdays, anniversary, Christmas, etc.

[CJB]

This is not a starting to date gift. This is a lets meet up gift. We may never do this again...

I'll keep thinkin!

[jocko]

you'll meet up again if U WANT TO.. just sayin

[ltxi]

Well, I just spent a few hours looking all over the net....

Here's what I came up with -

Something to appeal to "togetherness" in a way.
Something to appeal to the artistic nature
Something to appeal to naked male and female figures...
Something timeless, yet modern
Something which might appeal to her feminist nature

Found a set of Vitruvian Man / Vitruvian Woman mugs.

The male figure the classic DaVinci, the female one a modern female homage.

Thoughts folks?

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v214/bandersnatchreverb/vitruvian_woman_mug.jpghttp://img.photobucket.com/albums/v214/bandersnatchreverb/da_vinci_vitruvian_man_mug.jpg

You're TF hopeless. Listen to Tinman and hope she TG she doesn't read this board.

[jocko]

oh indeed listen to tinman, he would mess up a wet dream!!! Just sayin

[CJB]

Well.... as it happens...

A small flurry of texts revealed her interest in daVinci, as a melding of art and science, which is also what she does in her vocation, which is also her avocation.

I gotta sleep on this some....

[CJB]

And I'm hopeless... but then again.... who needs hope... or change?

[mr surveyor]

how about tattoo her name on your bu tt chee k
:D

[rholmes69]

If you both ride, what is something useful to have as a woman who rides? Got any female friends local who could give you a suggestion? That way, it shows you took the time to investigate as to what a lady might want and it fits into an obviously definite interest that can be used universally whether you are there or not. I only ride four wheelers (and occasionally at that), but something my wife and I enjoy is camping and hiking. She freaks out (excitedly obviously) whenever I buy her a pair of smartwool hiking socks. They are sometimes tough to track down (have to go to a camping or hiking store), surprisingly comfortable (many can attest that hiking requires good equipment to not leave you blisters, etc) and is a bit of a splurge at $25 for a pair of socks. I understand that socks for a rider probably isn't what you were thinking of as "hey, I'm glad we are hanging out" gift, but that is why I say you should appeal to some female riders so you can get some insider knowledge. Just my two cents...

[Armybrat]

Since it's a bike event, why not wait until you are there and strolling around together and if you think you are interested get a trinket souvenir at the event as your "first date". Buy it together as a couple thing.

Trinket doesn't mean a full size chrome bumper but something like a bracelet charm that commemorates the event. You never know, 10 years from now she may show it to you and say "remember our first date?"

PS: I met my wife on a blind date and we've been together over 46 years.

:yo:

Almost the same here. Met my lovely wife at a mutual friend's wedding & asked her out.

Proposed to her a week later. We celebrated our 45th in June.

[tilefish]

Whatever you do, don't let this happen lol

http://forum.bodybuilding.com/showthread.php?t=120921191&page=1









I realize that thread has been circulating the interwebs for years but it is still hysterical.

[CJB]

****.... ****... ****.....

I have no qualms peein' just about anywhere, in front of anybody, at any time, or state of sobriety.

Number 2, is a totally different story.

~~

That guy telling the tale has no sense of hydraulic engineering. Numerically 2 beats out 1 every time. So the proper countermeasures, when faced with such a "hard situation" is to take matters into ones own hands, restrict the flow through the male plumbing, then once the garbage has been taken out the back door, the restriction can be safely removed.

Some people can't think on their feet, or bottoms it seems.

[tv_racin_fan]

Every girl is different, well mostly anyway.

My wife loves a cheap bouquet of flowers every now and again. So much so that since I been bringing them to her now and again if somehow I forget she gets some for herself and hugs me for the flowers. She loves it if I cut some out of the yard. Even when I got some that she didn't particularly like I got hugs and kisses for the thought.. (I knew she wouldn't particularly like them, I didn't either BUT it was all they had that week, and she had a need for some flowers)

Other girls like flowers but they prefer a plant, they see cut flowers as a waste since they are already dead.

I like the mug but I think I would get the classical one and not the modern female one.

[Double3]

Biker chic?

Jack Daniels and condoms sounds like a safe bet.:cool:

Damn I miss those days. Had to go off and get married...lol

The Fatboy left the garage like 5 times this year.

[jocko]

Biker chic?

Jack Daniels and condoms sounds like a safe bet.:cool:

Damn I miss those days. Had to go off and get married...lol

The Fatboy left the garage like 5 times this year.

be punished. Just sayin:eek:

[JFootin]

Biker chic?

Jack Daniels and condoms sounds like a safe bet.:cool:

Damn I miss those days. Had to go off and get married...lol

The Fatboy left the garage like 5 times this year.

Years ago, I saw a bumper sticker on an old pickup truck:
"FROM WINE,WOMEN AND SONG
TO BEER, THE OLD LADY AND TV."

[Double3]

be punished. Just sayin:eek:
Oh yeah I'm much better off than I was then.

Might be dead! :eek:

Although she might kill me lol

[CJB]

UPDATE

~~~~

Oh this is gonna be the blind date from hell.

Just found out she's a big part of the Occupy movement

At least I'll have a few hours of being able to crap down her political views....

~~~

[melissa5]

Well crap! I'm sorry, CJB! Ya'll could just agree to not discuss politics and make the best of it.

[Tinman507]

Just found out she's a big part of the Occupy movement


Well at least you know she's easily talked into stuff :hippie:

[CJB]

Maybe shes Catholic too.... That would make things easier....ahem...

[Double3]

Oh man good luck...

Well you shouldn't have trouble getting lucky.

[hardluk1]

CJB You been commumicating for a while now . You should by now know what you to have in common. If her life style and out look on life is very different from your and all you see is its just a one time date enjoy it for what it brings. If it turns out you two really get along well and end up seeing eye to eye then go to the next step. If shes a biker chick for bring her a T shirt from a local bike shop or dealer. . Something scooter related, maybe. If she understands firearms too, maybe go shooting together. If shes really not into ether?? Then you go some education on what not to look for in a women. If she starts a politcal rant. Say it was nice to see you again and have a good life and leave. Lifes to short to out your self thru to much poop.

But keep a pint of wild turkey and some condoms in the saddle bag just in case.

[jayseas]

Can't go wrong with a CM9

[Bawanna]

I say cut your losses and run pal. Send her a Romney Ryan T shirt as a good riddance gesture.

Occupy? Not a good sign my friend.

[jocko]

I would have thought u would have sensed the occupy wall street alot earlie.r Kinda IMO hard tohidethose feelins. Have to agree with Bawanna on this one. Not often I do that but when he hits a homer, u need to clapp. Just sayin

[Double3]

With this new revelation we will need to see pics of her to make a good decision.


:D

[Alfonse]

After reading this string, I can only suggest you give a power of attorney to a trusted, very well balanced friend that can veto any thoughts you might have of marriage for the next decade or so.

This is truly offered in your best interest... :D

[getsome]

Whata you think about a gift of pepper spray, I hear those Occupy kind of folks eat that stuff up!!!...:p

[Alfonse]

Whata you think about a gift of pepper spray, I hear those Occupy kind of folks eat that stuff up!!!...:p

You could be more subtle, and just give her Tabasco Sauce in a squirt gun.

[CJB]

Hot sauce in a squirt gun, is exactly what I hope to give her....

[ltxi]

Well....sure can't beat that one. Oh, yeah, you're ready for this.

[Starbug]

Her political affiliation is most unfortunate. But since you two do have other things in common and seemed to get along well and enjoy each others conversations, I would suggest planning to hang out together and have fun with the things you guys do have in common, and forgoing the gift idea all together since that might send her the message that you guys might be up for a second date and perhaps more after this first date. She is apparently a decent enough human being (otherwise you wouldn't have been interested in meeting up with her in the first place), so it's worth hanging out with her at least this once. If she brings up the Occupy movement (or politics in general), just politely tell her that you'd rather not discuss politics/Occupy since that's probably not going to go very well. Enjoy her company for what it is, don't do anything immature or anything you might regret later. Who knows, maybe you will find her enjoyable enough to meet up with every time you go to this biker event (so long as politics/Occupy are left out of conversations), but just not enough to pursue into a relationship. Nothing wrong with that. I have several friends who don't share my political views/love of firearms at all, but we get along just fine anyway. We know not to discuss certain topics because we'll never see eye to eye on it, so we respect each other's opinions and right to disagree, and simply don't go there. So it is possible for you and this biker/Occupy lady to get along and enjoy each others company, even though you don't share the same political views. As long as she can respect that and leave out Occupy topics, then you two will be fine.

[Don K.]

run long and run far, the ponit is to RUN!!!

[getsome]

Well dang CJB, there's your answer...Excellent reply there Starbug and welcome aboard to Kahrtalk...We need more normble folks like you around here to balance out the other cynical old coots like myself...I think CJB should do just just what you advised and give it a whirl and see what happens, you just never know and like the song says, "You can't always get what you want but if you try sometimes you just might find you get what you need"....

[CJB]

Her political affiliation is most unfortunate. But since you two do have other things in common and seemed to get along well and enjoy each others conversations, I would suggest planning to hang out together and have fun with the things you guys do have in common, and forgoing the gift idea all together since that might send her the message that you guys might be up for a second date and perhaps more after this first date. She is apparently a decent enough human being (otherwise you wouldn't have been interested in meeting up with her in the first place), so it's worth hanging out with her at least this once. If she brings up the Occupy movement (or politics in general), just politely tell her that you'd rather not discuss politics/Occupy since that's probably not going to go very well. Enjoy her company for what it is, don't do anything immature or anything you might regret later. Who knows, maybe you will find her enjoyable enough to meet up with every time you go to this biker event (so long as politics/Occupy are left out of conversations), but just not enough to pursue into a relationship. Nothing wrong with that. I have several friends who don't share my political views/love of firearms at all, but we get along just fine anyway. We know not to discuss certain topics because we'll never see eye to eye on it, so we respect each other's opinions and right to disagree, and simply don't go there. So it is possible for you and this biker/Occupy lady to get along and enjoy each others company, even though you don't share the same political views. As long as she can respect that and leave out Occupy topics, then you two will be fine.

Second date? You mean wif the same woman? You can do that?
More after the first date - is the whole reason for the first date, ain't it?
Immature or regret.... you mean like getting wasted and having her name tattooed on my butt, something like that? I agree!

~

Seriously. This will be a short ride, lunch, maybe hang a bit... She is no biker. She is anything but. She has worked at biker events which is how we met. Its ok... a date is a date. She'll get her lil' gift too, its my way.

[MW surveyor]

Dang, you're just a big ol softy after all. :)

[Bawanna]

In the immortal words or our own dear departed Dietrich, use her like a rented mule and then kick her to the curb.

For all my much loved cyber brides, I'm not normally like this and it must be the occupy thing that setting me off.

I'm off for a 4 day mental health weekend (van's broke again, lift no go uppy and downy so I'll just stay home). Hopefully my urine poor attitude will improve during this time.

[jocko]

glad to see ur in a good mood today. woldn't want it any other way.

by the way its piss poor atitude, say what u think..

[CJB]

This will be ok.

Spooks 'n Scoots this weekend, along with ABATE meeting

Next weekend - Biketoberfest

Thats mental health enough!~

[Starbug]

Well dang CJB, there's your answer...Excellent reply there Starbug and welcome aboard to Kahrtalk...We need more normble folks like you around here to balance out the other cynical old coots like myself...I think CJB should do just just what you advised and give it a whirl and see what happens, you just never know and like the song says, "You can't always get what you want but if you try sometimes you just might find you get what you need"....

Lol, I sure I liked the ideas you guys came up with (the pepper spray idea made me LOL), and I'd be tempted to do those to her myself, were I in his shoes. Heck, I have my own evil suggestions that crossed my mind even as I was typing up something much nicer, lol. I don't like the Occupy people, so I can understand how/why you guys came up with those ideas. I just figured I'd offer up a balanced point of view for him to consider as well.

Thanks for the welcome, too. :-)

[Starbug]

Second date? You mean wif the same woman? You can do that? <--- Yup, you can. She might even agree willingly! But if not, they have things you can put into drinks..... it still counts as a second date, even if she doesn't know she's there and can't remember any of it. Lol.
More after the first date - is the whole reason for the first date, ain't it? <--- Yup, first date is a test drive. Second date is because you liked the test drive. If you make it to the third, you might have something good going for the two of you.
Immature or regret.... you mean like getting wasted and having her name tattooed on my butt, something like that? I agree! <--- Yes, exactly that. Lol! Tattoos are forever....

~

Seriously. This will be a short ride, lunch, maybe hang a bit... She is no biker. She is anything but. She has worked at biker events which is how we met. Its ok... a date is a date. She'll get her lil' gift too, its my way.

Very cool of you. You may or may not be surprised at how this goes, but you'll never know unless you give it a try. Go and have a good time! :)

[Bawanna]

I wouldn't even go. I hate occupiers more than Starbug. I'd stand her up myself.

I know of pathetic losers that had no care about the Occupy agenda but had no place to live and nothing to live on so they went from one to another and hung out. People gave them tents and food all for the cause.
What a cause it must be huh.

Starbug will you marry me?

[muggsy]

Well crap! I'm sorry, CJB! Ya'll could just agree to not discuss politics and make the best of it.

If they do discuss politics Jocko had better throw in a reference to a CM9 so that Bawanna doesn't set a curfew on his date.

[melissa5]

In the immortal words or our own dear departed Dietrich, use her like a rented mule and then kick her to the curb.

For all my much loved cyber brides, I'm not normally like this and it must be the occupy thing that setting me off.



Diet certainly had a way with words. LOL

I too detest the occupy crowd and will no longer let myself buy Ben & Jerry's ice cream since they donated money to them. That makes me very sad. :(

[jocko]

IhaTE ICE CREAM AS U WELL KNOW..

[melissa5]

IhaTE ICE CREAM AS U WELL KNOW..

No, I didn't know. Why? Did you eat too much and freeze your boys off? :p

[OldLincoln]

No, he saw a bunch on the roadway and decided to lick it up - at 60mph!

[MW surveyor]

No, I didn't know. Why? Did you eat too much and freeze your boys off? :p

I can't believe she said that!

[melissa5]

No, he saw a bunch on the roadway and decided to lick it up - at 60mph!

Oh my...not good!

[jocko]

I can't believe she said that!

either. Bawanna has changted her alot on this fourm, I remember when she first came on. Nice and sweet, and oh so politie. Now look, making fun of an ol man, who still has his "boys" by the way.

[Tinman507]

Now look, making fun of an ol man, who still has his "boys" by the way, tucked safely in his socks.

That's your secret!! I am impressed

[mr surveyor]

how much did the taxidermist charge for them "boys"?:p

[jocko]

those "boys" as Melliss calls um are up and rairun to go. Just sayin

at age 69 today I walked 4 hard miles, worked out in the gym 60 hard minutes, and as soon as I woke up from that dream, I went and had a milkshake. Yup them "boys" are doin OK.

[GROTMAN]

GOT BOYS ??

http://static.pyzam.com/img/funnypics/animals/an11.jpg (http://www.pyzam.com/funnypictures/details/10159?cat=all&sort=popular)

[jocko]

precisely my point. I had a dog like that once and he had a set to be admired, he pranced around the yard.His name was MINK because he,, well u know what minks do best..
for all to see his "BOYS". He died a year ago. Docotrs told us he had a rare desease called boyanitus syckosis. What happened was every time he took a dump he dumped on his "boys" AND THEY got infected. We tried taping them to his belley but he did'n't like that, . We gave him some eli lilly experimental drugs called anti boyaitues syckosis. the bottle said B.S. I have his "boys stuffed and framed in my trophy room. If Melissa keeps pissin me off, I might just box them BOYS up and send them to her Just sayin.

[mr surveyor]

precisely my point. I had a dog like that once and he had a set to be admired, he pranced around the yard.His name was MINK because he,, well u know what minks do best..
for all to see his "BOYS". He died a year ago. Docotrs told us he had a rare desease called boyanitus syckosis. What happened was every time he took a dump he dumped on his "boys" AND THEY got infected. We tried taping them to his belley but he did'n't like that, . We gave him some eli lilly experimental drugs called anti boyaitues syckosis. the bottle said B.S. I have his "boys stuffed and framed in my trophy room. If Melissa keeps pissin me off, I might just box them BOYS up and send them to her Just sayin.


now, that there's funny:)

[jocko]

gods truth, so help me obama.,oh wait,he is God...!!

[melissa5]

:eek: Remind me NOT to open any packages from Jocko. Packages LOL!!!

[jocko]

moving every 6 months might help but sooner or later it will arrive. I'm patient. afterallu know I have my BOYS to take care of. I think ol MINK would have liked u--ALOT. Just sayin

[CJB]

Blind date texted me today.
Wanted to let me know she's invited two of her gal friends to join the fun.

Ordinarily, this might be reason to get a 3rd six pack of condrims, and maybe some vodka or rum to go with the bourbon. But, in this case... not so. Have been informed "they'll me me there".

This may yet involve some roofie's and pure grain alcobooz.

[Bawanna]

I think shes onto ya and is bringing chaperones.

[CJB]

Hey maybe they'll let me watch as a consolation prize!~

[MW surveyor]

Hey, maybe either she or one of the girl friends reads this forum! Now you're SOL.

[MikeyKahr]

CJB...bring her a bar of soap (for her occupy side) and a $0.99 loofa (for her feminine side). Good to go!

[mr surveyor]

stay home and have a beer or three...it's more sanitary

[jocko]

Blind date texted me today.
Wanted to let me know she's invited two of her gal friends to join the fun.

Ordinarily, this might be reason to get a 3rd six pack of condrims, and maybe some vodka or rum to go with the bourbon. But, in this case... not so. Have been informed "they'll me me there".

This may yet involve some roofie's and pure grain alcobooz.

I think u need help friend and as a biker, WE STICK TOGETHER. Got the oil changedf and I am leaving soon. I'll find u, don't worry about that. Keep um happy until I get there and then ol jocko will take over. Just sayin

ur originally started out with just one, so don't get greedy, I will take the burden of the other two. I brought two leases also, in case they are dogs.

Look for me thought I will be riding a harley, should be easy. My Indiana plate is HD..

[Double3]

I think shes onto ya and is bringing chaperones.
C**kblockers

[Tinman507]

http://www.google.com/url?source=imglanding&ct=img&q=http://static.yousaytoo.com/post_images/c7/b0/f5/9185854/remote_image_2623cb5ff4.jpg&sa=X&ei=aEp4UOPPMsqO0QHZp4GADA&ved=0CAkQ8wc&usg=AFQjCNG5nM9VGD5QcyQSZd1xlk7-yPEZ_w

[TucsonMTB]

As usual, the KahrTalk community rises to the challenge . . .

What could possibly go wrong? http://home.mindspring.com/%7Ejustsomeguy/icon_lol.gif

[melissa5]

This thread has gotten so long that I've forgotten when the date is supposed to be. Tomorrow?

[Bawanna]

I did CJB a favor and cancelled the rendevous. Told her to take her friends and go find a creek and act like a ****.

Who knew you couldn't say the other word for dam?

[CJB]

NEXT Saturday...

[Starbug]

I wouldn't even go. I hate occupiers more than Starbug. I'd stand her up myself.

I know of pathetic losers that had no care about the Occupy agenda but had no place to live and nothing to live on so they went from one to another and hung out. People gave them tents and food all for the cause.
What a cause it must be huh.

Starbug will you marry me?

Lol, oh I hide my real feelings towards the Occupiers very well on public forums.

Sorry Bawanna, I'm already taken....

[Starbug]

Reading about the "boys" jokes reminds me not to read some threads while trying to drink. Gatorade out the nose burns....

As for bringing lady friends to the date... maybe one of them isn't an Occupier? You never know. At least this takes the pressure off, it's definitely more of a social event now.

[jocko]

gatoraide out the nose, that ain't nuttin. U will never experience boyunitus scycosius. Just sayin.

[Bawanna]

Lol, oh I hide my real feelings towards the Occupiers very well on public forums.

Sorry Bawanna, I'm already taken....

Most all of my cyber brides are already married. I like to think of it as an open relationship since we'll never probably meet or even know what we look like.

This is my first rejection too. I don't mind telling ya I'm looking for a beach towel as I'm feeling the tears welling up and I fear there's gonna be a bawling episode very soon. This early on a Saturday too.

Don't worry I'll be ok, really I will.

[CJB]

Reading about the "boys" jokes reminds me not to read some threads while trying to drink. Gatorade out the nose burns....

As for bringing lady friends to the date... maybe one of them isn't an Occupier? You never know. At least this takes the pressure off, it's definitely more of a social event now.

One thing I learned shooting armadildos and igwannabees is "always use enough gun". Them critters are some tuff hombres!

I recon the same thing goes for occupiers, wingmen, etc... always use enough gun, in a figurative sense, of course.

~~~~

The whole damn trip has fallen in to chaos. Friends from Tampa can't make it. I'm stuck with an extra room that I can neither refund or unload on someone. I got friends saying even with a free room, they can't make it, but they are ... to their credit ... trying to help find an "occupier" for the other room. The gal I wanna meet is bringing a wingman and traveling with her.

Next thing ya know, my leathers are gonna rot away on the road and I'll have to ride nekked as a hedgehog and find new ones at less than tourist prices.

[CJB]

Which reminds me -

If anybody wants a free room for biketoberfest, Oct 19th-20th, just say the word.
Technically its free, since its paid (dearly) for, but I'd accept a token offering (not full room price... ) to help defer expenses if one were to offer. IOW, a few bux for the room would be nice, but not required, as its an expense I cannot get out of paying.

[yqtszhj]

It's all a sign. Bawanna had it right. stand her up (ok, give them to Jocko) Give up the plans for biketoberfest all together and head the other direction. Somewhere like key west. You'll be glad you did.

[JFootin]

Most all of my cyber brides are already married. I like to think of it as an open relationship since we'll never probably meet or even know what we look like.

This is my first rejection too. I don't mind telling ya I'm looking for a beach towel as I'm feeling the tears welling up and I fear there's gonna be a bawling episode very soon. This early on a Saturday too.

Don't worry I'll be ok, really I will.

It's OK, Starbug. There is no law against cyber marriage, nor is it unlawful if you are already married. In fact, having many cyber wives is encouraged in cyber space! :angel: In fact, you could marry Bawanna and me and be rich with cyber husbands! :cheer2:

So dry Bawanna's tears and tell him you'll marry him. You'll make him a happy man! :)

[jocko]

It's all a sign. Bawanna had it right. stand her up (ok, give them to Jocko) Give up the plans for biketoberfest all together and head the other direction. Somewhere like key west. You'll be glad you did.

good ol key west highesT population of gays and lesbo's than anywhere, eVen beats san francisco. My wife I and a few years ago road the bikes from Indiana to key west and the first thing I noticed when we got there was the "gay ald lesbian INFORMATION centers. WTf, we got the hell outta dodge pronto. Geez us christ, they dn't hide it down there. Whatever anchor is holding key west where it is at, they betterhope I can't find that fokking anchor. Just sayin

[yqtszhj]

good ol key west highesT population of gays and lesbo's than anywhere, eVen beats san francisco. My wife I and a few years ago road the bikes from Indiana to key west and the first thing I noticed when we got there was the "gay ald lesbian INFORMATION centers. WTf, we got the hell outta dodge pronto. Geez us christ, they dn't hide it down there. Whatever anchor is holding key west where it is at, they betterhope I can't find that fokking anchor. Just sayin

Better skip key west too then. Man, where is there to go??? Whole country is getting messed up.

[CJB]

Key West... a marginalized place at best.

The kind of place where if you drop a ten dollar bill on the ground, as you're thinking about whether you really should risk bending over to pick it up, the guy in front of you has already done so, and accepting the ten-spot as payment, is still bent over....

Not my cup of tea, or coffee, or bourbon either for that matter.

[jocko]

u can't even say fokkum down there, FOR THEY WILL DO IT. gave me shivers. us ol northern boys ain't used to seein it in public display like that. I would have pee'd my pants before I went into any men's restroom. Some guy pissed me off down there and I said bite my ass, and damn 50 guys came out of the woods with a smile. defriitely need a G17 wti 33 round mag certainly no single stack kahrs. Just to many of them.. Just sayin

I think I found the anchor rope holding key west where it is. Let them cubans have um. I bet holloween night there is a real "freak' show.. I was told that U DO NOT WANT TO GO INTO "any" BAR BY YOURSELF. Man or woman.:banplease:

[CJB]

Actually, its two weeks from this weekend Jocko - they call it "Fantasy Fest".

Not a place I would like to be. Basically nekked folks cavorting - and I do me cavorting - through down town KW.

Bordering on the worst job in the world ever - is the city workers who gotta clean up all the trash from the streets... which are full of the "forensic evidence".

[jocko]

Actually, its two weeks from this weekend Jocko - they call it "Fantasy Fest".

Not a place I would like to be. Basically nekked folks cavorting - and I do me cavorting - through down town KW.

Bordering on the worst job in the world ever - is the city workers who gotta clean up all the trash from the streets... which are full of the "forensic evidence".

gays rule down there.:banplease:

[Bawanna]

Hey where the heck is wynn? Isn't he down that direction?

[melissa5]

Hey where the heck is wynn? Isn't he down that direction?

LOL! You're not trying to say that Wynn is a Lebanese, are you? :p

[Bawanna]

LOL! You're not trying to say that Wynn is a Lebanese, are you? :p

Well I didn't think he was but life is full of surprises. Kind of like the shock I got when I learned about Jocko............ Hurts to talk about it.

[CJB]

On a more profoundly "rubber meets the road" train of thought (not the Key West rubber meets the road....), I wonder what our beloved Deitrich would say about my troubles.

[Bawanna]

I gotta believe it would involve copious amounts of grease and a prison fence.

[Starbug]

I gotta believe it would involve copious amounts of grease and a prison fence.

Lol, sounds like a funny guy to have on the forums. I think I read that he passed away? Very sad. :(

[Starbug]

gatoraide out the nose, that ain't nuttin. U will never experience boyunitus scycosius. Just sayin.

Thank god. Because if I do, that means there's something my mom should have told me... Lol.

[Starbug]

Most all of my cyber brides are already married. I like to think of it as an open relationship since we'll never probably meet or even know what we look like.

This is my first rejection too. I don't mind telling ya I'm looking for a beach towel as I'm feeling the tears welling up and I fear there's gonna be a bawling episode very soon. This early on a Saturday too.

Don't worry I'll be ok, really I will.

Awwww, no don't cry! I didn't realize it was open to us married gals. Is it too late to accept?

[Starbug]

It's OK, Starbug. There is no law against cyber marriage, nor is it unlawful if you are already married. In fact, having many cyber wives is encouraged in cyber space! :angel: In fact, you could marry Bawanna and me and be rich with cyber husbands! :cheer2:

So dry Bawanna's tears and tell him you'll marry him. You'll make him a happy man! :)

Awe sure, why not? I'll marry the both of you. Why stop at just one? :D

[Bawanna]

Its never too late. I feel so much better now, except now I'm kind of jealous you being married to Jfootin too.

[Starbug]

Is that all true about Key West? I thought San Francisco was the only place like that. Wow.

You know how to keep somebody from getting in your pants? Tattoo "I have AIDS" on your front or backside (depending on your gender, because entry will vary accordingly). A little doubt goes a long way....lol.

[jocko]

SF is worse, but more population to choose from

[JFootin]

Awe sure, why not? I'll marry the both of you. Why stop at just one? :D

You've made me a happy man! :D
:cheer2::cheer2::cheer2::cheer2::cheer2::cheer2:

[JFootin]

Is that all true about Key West? I thought San Francisco was the only place like that. Wow.

I was born and raised in Asheville, NC. There is a large population of them in that city. They like to gather in a location and bring God's wrath down on it. Remember Sodom? Remember the great San Francisco earthquake? Remember New Orleans which stubbornly promotes and hosts the Southern Decadence Festival, a homosexual orgy in the streets of the city? God signals his displeasure and no one listens. He just sent another hurricane at New Orleans exactly on the 7th anniversary of when Katrina hit, and also the opening day of that shameful annual orgy that they still host.

[PattayaPistol]

I was born and raised in Asheville, NC. There is a large population of them in that city. They like to gather in a location and bring God's wrath down on it. Remember Sodom? Remember the great San Francisco earthquake? Remember New Orleans which stubbornly promotes and hosts the Southern Decadence Festival, a homosexual orgy in the streets of the city? God signals his displeasure and no one listens. He just sent another hurricane at New Orleans exactly on the 7th anniversary of when Katrina hit, and also the opening day of that shameful annual orgy that they still host.

Man, I don't like their life choice, but are you serious? I hear the exact same thing from the radical mullahs in Iran. Holy crap, it is really difficult for me to believe you could be serious. I realize that coming from different countries we think differently but it wasn't until now that I realized how differently. I'm glad at least we have guns in common.

I need to be careful here because the way I've heard it explained, I think I'm a lesbian

Cheers
PP

[CJB]

Lol, sounds like a funny guy to have on the forums. I think I read that he passed away? Very sad. :(

Indeed, he touched many a life, most without their husbands knowing about it either!~

[CJB]

Is that all true about Key West? I thought San Francisco was the only place like that. Wow.

Starbug, Key West is more severe of a problem than SanFran. It has to do with the concentration. Key West being a tiny place and the population of fancy's being so high.

It is a known fact, as has been demonstrated by the US NAVAL AIR STATION at Key West, that airplanes flying over the island will actually lose altitude due to the vacuum beneath them, caused by all the suction created at ground level. That just does not happen at San Fran.

[jocko]

now that is a good one CJB. original no doubt

WHEN U SEE MORE gay and lesbo information centers, than motels. Then for most of us, it is a tell tale sign to get the fokk outta dodge. I think that is why they built the 7 mile bridge to. for those coming into KW. It gives u sometime to change ur mind. What a sh!thole place to go IMO. Not sure I would eat their food there either. asI don't know who is fixin it and how.

When u see a gal at the beech with what looks like a bikini top on but SPEEDO'S on the bottom, its anutter tell tale sign to get the fokk outta dodge. Just sayin

[Bawanna]

Lets reset a course back to the matter at hand, CJB's upcoming quasy date, rendevous, whatever.

See no point in promoting a Lebanese discussion any further. Or Key West for that matter.

[JFootin]

Man, I don't like their life choice, but are you serious? I hear the exact same thing from the radical mullahs in Iran. Holy crap, it is really difficult for me to believe you could be serious. I realize that coming from different countries we think differently but it wasn't until now that I realized how differently. I'm glad at least we have guns in common.

I need to be careful here because the way I've heard it explained, I think I'm a lesbian

Cheers
PP

PP, I believe the bible and the proven history in it. The bible tells the story of mankind falling into sin and every sort of gross perversion. It also makes it very plain that God regards homosexuality as especially gross perversion, and that he has shown a track record of severe punishment of those who practice it. Do you really believe that recent hurricane hitting New Orleans exactly 7 years after Katrina and on the starting day of that shameful orgy is just chance? For me, it is harder to believe that is just chance than to believe in a biblical explanation. I think Key West is overdue for destruction. Keep watching...

[yqtszhj]

You've made me a happy man! :D
:cheer2:

One more thing as we get back to the original topic. I can see a TV show in Bawanna's and Jfootin's future based after the TLC show "Sister Wives". It will be "Cyber Brother husbands.":eek::banplease:

[CJB]

At least its a quasi date, not a Quasimodo date.....

[jocko]

what the hell was the original topic???

[CJB]

The OT was my quandry for the Blind Date... which, as with all things female, is either gonna be very good, or very bad.

[PattayaPistol]

Right, I'm back on topic. I just can't remember what that was now, and anyway, staying on topic just isn't the KahrTalk way. Ok, ok, I'm back and I stand in favor of running. Keep it a fantasy relationship. When your political views are so opposed, I don't see much fun there, especially so close to such an important election.

Cheers
PP

[GROTMAN]

The OT was my quandry for the Blind Date... which, as with all things female, is either gonna be very good, or very bad.

All you have to do for a good time is figure this out :)

http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t219/Cybenator/Misc/photo.jpg

[Tinman507]

:third:

[jocko]

super. ditto to what Tinman posted..

[jocko]

Right, I'm back on topic. I just can't remember what that was now, and anyway, staying on topic just isn't the KahrTalk way. Ok, ok, I'm back and I stand in favor of running. Keep it a fantasy relationship. When your political views are so opposed, I don't see much fun there, especially so close to such an important election.

Cheers
PP

here since day 1 and never seen any thread that never stayed on target. We are a very disciplined forum, we don't cater to thread jacking, certainy our super here mod the GREAT ONE is on top of that stuff to. He just doesn't allow it. and as u know he never never gets off track. He is a very disciplined leader. Just sayin:banplease:

What election??? When is that.??? I never knew that,never seen nuttin about it either.:banplease:

If this fourm starts to get off thread, I am gonna take my 250 posts and just move on:31:

[CJB]

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v214/bandersnatchreverb/women-brain2.gif
Woman's Brain

[jlottmc]

If I wasn't on my work computer, I'd post a mans brain. Might get banned afterwards but it'd be funny.

[melissa5]

If I wasn't on my work computer, I'd post a mans brain. Might get banned afterwards but it'd be funny.

Bwahaha!

Here's one that is safe for work http://images.huffingtonpost.com/2010-03-14-male_brain.gif

[MW surveyor]

My ironing center is much smaller than that shown on the brain chart. LOL

[jlottmc]

Mine's bigger, and the kids in the night thing, BTDT, yes it was daddy that got up with mine.

[MW surveyor]

you didn't get the MSDS on women.

[Bawanna]

My name is bawanna and I DO NOT endorse the previous post. I know nothing.

[Tinman507]

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/a/a2/Shakespeare.jpg/250px-Shakespeare.jpg

"Me thinks he doth protest too much."

William Shakespeare

[Bawanna]

Speaking of "doth" where the heck is Jocko, he headed for Key West already. Talk about anxious.

[jocko]

yes the "doth" is headed to florida. I will be offline as of Friday for 9 days. I have all my peniscllian shots, 240 condoms. a gased up Harley Davidson, a vibrator seat installed, I will be wearing a Harley Davidson T-shirt ,so look for me. I CAN BE HAD. Just sayin.

[jocko]

My name is bawanna and I DO NOT endorse the previous post. I know nothing.

we all know that, u need not repeat urself. Just sayin

[Bawanna]

Maybe you need a laptop. I'm sure all of Key West is one big HOT SPOT so you could check in between conquest, kind of keep us up to day ya know.

[jocko]

I will bring my IPAD with a camera in it and post photos as I see um.course they gotta pass ur approval,so probably a snowbalsschance of any "good"forum members seeing ol jocko's trip south. Just sayin.

[Tinman507]

Jocko and his Tour Group

http://www.fla-keys.com/newsletter/special/images/SmostPoint.jpg

[jocko]

experimental hARLEYS, and yes those two gals behind me are my harley B!tchs and my bodyguards I need alot of security. Just sayin..

[GROTMAN]

http://www.guy-sports.com/fun_pictures/brain_female_sm.jpg (http://www.guy-sports.com/humor/jokes/jokes_classes_men.htm)

[jdlott74]

Mine's bigger, and the kids in the night thing, BTDT, yes it was daddy that got up with mine.

Yes, you did, much more than me most of the time.

[Bawanna]

Yes, you did, much more than me most of the time.



Did he pay you to say that? Are you under any duress?

[yqtszhj]

Shiney.......

CJB, you realize there is no chance of any valuable advice now, right???

[jocko]

Shiney.......

CJB, you realize there is no chance of any valuable advice now, right???

u hit that ail right on the ol head. remind me to never ask this forum for any advice:popcorn:

[Tinman507]

I'd never join any forum that would take advice from me.

[MW surveyor]

I'd never join any forum that would take advice from me.

So far your statement is 100%. :lie:

[TucsonMTB]

I'd never join any forum that would take advice from me.
With apologies to W.C. Fields, I presume . . . ;)

[jocko]

I'd never join any forum that would take advice from me.

u give advice to????Damn Tinman, what next. I bet u can fly. Are ur cahones steel, brass, platinum, gold or just gold electro plated??? Just askin.

[OldLincoln]

Man with all this fussing, ask yourself if this is what you really want? I mean it might be better to just say maybe you'll just see her there and no date or anything. Hate to see you show up all fancy like Pee Wee Herman and shaky like Barney Fife to meet a short pudgy looser. Then what do you do? In other words you are over thinking this thing, homy.

[Bawanna]

Short pudgy loser?..........you rang?