Novembers Notions and Happy Thoughts Place

[Bawanna]

After a few subtle hints and a couple threats of severe bodily harm I give you the November doesn't fit anywhere else thread.

I hope we have nothing but great news to celebrate next week but if we don't lets not turn our oasis into a smelter or hot box of discontent.

Let the games begin.

Anyone that scolds me for being a day early gets 20 demerits and a horse head from my partner in crime Jocko hisself.

[DeaconKC]

If Jocko is involved, be careful! He might use either end, depending on what was said! :)

[wyntrout]

November happy thoughts... storm go away and power come back for all of the storm victims... AND Obama go away, too, and give all of us victims a chance to get our government back! Back to normal SNAFU!

Wynn:D

[yqtszhj]

Happy thoughts, Hmmm..... less time at work (still employed though of course), More vacation, more range time, ammo on sale, my own property to build a shooting range, no bills in the mail, etc....

Now back to my regular programing. Vacation over on Thursday and back to work :(

[TucsonMTB]

I am happy to report that all that remains to is the final 80% of the last wall in the great house painting caper for this year! Eves and wood trim are all painted too. My joints only ache a little bit when I stay in one position too long.

Life will be very good soon! http://home.mindspring.com/~justsomeguy/icon_lol.gif

http://viewsfromtucson.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/06/joints_caulked.jpg

Oh, and in keeping with Bawanna's philosophy, today we road the bike and played with the slick new OKI MB471w Multi Function Printer. It scans, it copies, it FAXes and it prints (duplex) . . . all over the local network.

And everything works, even TWAIN scanning over the network! :eek:

[mr surveyor]

I am happy to report that all that remains to is the final 80% of the last wall in the great house painting caper for this year! Eves and wood trim are all painted too. My joints only ache a little bit when I stay in one position too long.

Life will be very good soon! http://home.mindspring.com/~justsomeguy/icon_lol.gif

http://viewsfromtucson.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/06/joints_caulked.jpg

Oh, and in keeping with Bawanna's philosophy, today we road the bike and played with the slick new OKI MB471w Multi Function Printer. It scans, it copies, it FAXes and it prints (duplex) . . . all over the local network.

And everything works, even TWAIN scanning over the network! :eek:



golly, Tuscon, sure glad you're finishing the outdoor work before the nasty winter weather sets in:rolleyes:


:)

[TucsonMTB]

golly, Tuscon, sure glad you're finishing the outdoor work before the nasty winter weather sets in:rolleyes:

:)
Thanks, Surv!

I'm sure you are tying up the loose ends too . . . before those Texas sized snow flakes start to fall . . .

NOT! http://home.mindspring.com/~justsomeguy/icon_lol.gif

[yqtszhj]

Ooooo....... painting is really my LEAST FAVORITE thing to do. That aside your work looks good.

How well does a paint job hold up there in AZ?

[TucsonMTB]

Ooooo....... painting is really my LEAST FAVORITE thing to do. That aside your work looks good.
Yeah, it's just great when you get finished. :)

Thanks for the kind words! The top of the line Behr brand paint, which is both a primer and top coat in one formula, should get a lot of the credit. It is really easy to achieve a uniform coat with that material.


How well does a paint job hold up there in AZ?
We built this house a little more than 10 years ago. The builder's paint job (Dunn-Edwards rather than Behr paint) is not peeling or flaking anywhere. But, it seems sort of porous, even under the eaves where the sun does not reach. Must be the "dry heat", I guess. ;)

Along with protecting the wood trim, a good paint moisture barrier seems to be important in preventing a few fine wall cracks at some joints, even though the stucco is applied to internally insulated, post tensioned, masonry walls. Go figure. :rolleyes:

[JFootin]

Political Correctness: Cultural Marxism; a Doctrine, fostered by a delusional, illogical Leftist minority and rabidly promoted by an unscrupulous Main-Stream Media, which holds forth the proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a turd by the clean end.

[QuercusMax]

I just voted early because I will be out of town all of next week.

I think I got most of the answers right, but I always struggle as I go further down the ballot where I am asked to vote for people and offices that I have never heard of. I am sometimes tempted to write in my dog's name, but I resist.

Anyway, since I have now cast my ballot, I want to know how I can tell all of those political advertisers that they are now wasting their money on me ???

[OldLincoln]

Of course Rachael from Credit Card Services will find a way. They change caller ID to mask who they are and their number. We get them at least 4 times a week in spite of being on the no call list. Seems our justice dept is too busy covering the administration's hind end to enforce citizen's laws.

[OldLincoln]

Out Of Town
The husband was watching TV as his wife was
out cutting the grass during the hot summer.
He finally worked up the energy to go out and
ask his wife, "What's for supper?"

"WHAT?!? You sit in the air conditioning all day
while I'm out here working?!? I can't believe you
have the nerve to ask me about supper right now!
Tell you what -- imagine I'm out of town. Go inside
and figure out dinner for yourself."

The husband went back in the house and fixed
himself a big steak with potatoes, garlic bread
and a tall glass of iced tea.

The wife finally finished the lawn and walked in
about the time he was finishing up. "You fixed
something to eat? So where is mine?"

"Huh? I thought you were out of town."

His viewing is Monday from 2-4 and 7-9. His
funeral is Tuesday.

[Armybrat]

For years the only way I could get sleepy enough to doze off at night was to watch some evening TV in the bedroom. However in recent years the old 25" tube TV was too dang small & fuzzy for my old eyes - couldn't read the graphics for any sports events or tell what kind of firearms were being used in movie shootouts.

Finally solved the problem by getting a cheap 43" Samsung plasma TV - $388 at Sam's. Hard to believe those things have come down so much in price the past few years - the first 42" Panasonic plasma I bought in 2006 cost $1500, and the second one (for my mancave) in 2008 was $700.

http://i522.photobucket.com/albums/w349/ScoPro/Armybrat3/Fall2012008.jpg

[yqtszhj]

Darn that TV is a good price.

[JFootin]

Of course Rachael from Credit Card Services will find a way. They change caller ID to mask who they are and their number. We get them at least 4 times a week in spite of being on the no call list. Seems our justice dept is too busy covering the administration's hind end to enforce citizen's laws.

Those phone mills are set up in Canada. They just laugh at our no call list. I'm going to get an aerosol boat horn and break some eardrums! :mad:

[O'Dell]

November could be very good or very bad, depending on the 6th. Either way, I'm sure we will always remember it.

[QuercusMax]

Those phone mills are set up in Canada. They just laugh at our no call list. I'm going to get an aerosol boat horn and break some eardrums! :mad:

Here's another technique that I use some times:

The worst thing you can do to those people is to waste their time, because (if they are not robo-caller machines) they are on a quota.

So when I choose to answer such a call, I usually say "Just a moment please..." and put the phone down without hanging up. Heh, heh, heh!

[Armybrat]

http://cdn.breitbart.com/mediaserver/Breitbart/Big-Peace/2012/10/30/SOS-FBMeme.jpg

[JFootin]

I think most of you will enjoy this, I know I did.....

Western Gunfight (http://biggeekdad.com/2012/09/western-gunfight/)


http://www.taurusarmed.net/forums/attachments/funny-farm/39598d1325879542t-western-gunfight-old-coot-guns.gif

[Chuck54]

November,cool weather,good scotch !:)

[hardscrabble]

Ahhhhhh.....November.

I'm going to blow the leaves off the (1/4 mile) driveway tomorrow, climb in the truck and head to the cabin for a (unspecified period) of black powder deer season. I'm not coming back home until a) I get a deer (I can be pretty selective this early), b) I run out of Stone IPA (I won't), c) or the weather report forecasts highs in the 70's for some number of straight days, which puts all those rutting bucks to bed during he daytime. (Please, please not 70 degree weather. If that happens I might be forced to come back home and see if I can catch a brookie or tow up in the park).

After two weeks of muzzle loader hunting, the rifle season starts and doesn't end until January.

Ahhhhhhh......November. No matter who wins, I'm betting there will be a 300% increase in internet posts. I'm almost sorry I'm going to miss it.

[Bawanna]

If you need a partner, I'm your man! Safety in pairs ya know.

[hardscrabble]

If you need a partner, I'm your man! Safety in pairs ya know.

You trade me out some steelhead/salmon/blacktail deer hunting? Or, heck, just come on. But make sure you bring some alder smoked salmon with you.

[mr surveyor]

Ahhhhhh.....November.

I'm going to blow the leaves off the (1/4 mile) driveway tomorrow, climb in the truck and head to the cabin for a (unspecified period) of black powder deer season. I'm not coming back home until a) I get a deer (I can be pretty selective this early), b) I run out of Stone IPA (I won't), c) or the weather report forecasts highs in the 70's for some number of straight days, which puts all those rutting bucks to bed during he daytime. (Please, please not 70 degree weather. If that happens I might be forced to come back home and see if I can catch a brookie or tow up in the park).

After two weeks of muzzle loader hunting, the rifle season starts and doesn't end until January.

Ahhhhhhh......November. No matter who wins, I'm betting there will be a 300% increase in internet posts. I'm almost sorry I'm going to miss it.




as a former home brewer (really need to get back into the groove) of many varieties....especially IPA's.... I would love to assist you as your arms bearer. Not that I would mind the opportunity to shoot as well, but for unlimited IPA I would even clean your guns after the hunt:D

surv

PS: PM me with the coordinates of where to meet... I can't leave Stumpwater, TX, for at least 20 minutes so give me some lead time:)

[Bawanna]

You trade me out some steelhead/salmon/blacktail deer hunting? Or, heck, just come on. But make sure you bring some alder smoked salmon with you.

I can fix you up with smoked salmon for sure. My son's been knocking them dead this year. Works on boats and goes out with guys all the time. The last batch we smoked was incredible.
I cross a very good river for Steelhead going to work.

Blacktail are in abundance, usually see them in yards close to home. Try not to hit the windows of nearby houses.

Had a beautiful pheasant right on the side of the road last night coming home but he was on the passenger side and before I could get in park, and get the door open and the Cbob out, it just didn't work out.
Always afraid they get far enough off the road I can't get em in the wheelchair. Son recommended fishing line with a big treble hook for retrieval, cleaver one he is.

[JFootin]

Always ask; never assume

His request approved, the CNN News photographer quickly used a cell phone to call the local airport to charter a flight.

He was told a twin-engine plane would be waiting for him at the airport.

Arriving at the airfield, he spotted a plane warming up outside a hanger.

He jumped in with his bag, slammed the door shut, and shouted, 'Let's go'.

The pilot taxied out, swung the plane into the wind and took off.

Once in the air, the photographer instructed the pilot, 'Fly over the valley and make low passes so I can take pictures of the fires on the hillsides.'

'Why?' asked the pilot.

'Because I'm a photographer for CNN' , he responded, 'and I need to get some close up shots.'

The pilot was strangely silent for a moment, finally he stammered, 'So, what you're telling me, is . . . You're NOTmy flight instructor?

[JFootin]

Hollywoos Squares Oldies but still goodies


Hollywood Squares: These great questions and answers are from the days when ' Hollywood Squares' game show responses were spontaneous, not scripted, as they are now. Peter Marshall was the host asking the questions, of course...

Q.. Paul, what is a good reason for pounding meat?
A. Paul Lynde: Loneliness!
(The audience laughed so long and so hard it took up almost 15 minutes of the show!)

Q. Do female frogs croak?
A. Paul Lynde: If you hold their little heads under water long enough.

Q. If you're going to make a parachute jump, at least how high should you be?
A. Charley Weaver: Three days of steady drinking should do it.

Q. True or False, a pea can last as long as 5,000 years.
A. George Gobel: Boy, it sure seems that way sometimes.

Q. You've been having trouble going to sleep. Are you probably a man or a woman?
A.. Don Knotts: That's what's been keeping me awake.

Q. According to Cosmopolitan, if you meet a stranger at a party and you think that he is attractive, is it okay to come out and ask him if he's married?
A.. Rose Marie: No wait until morning.

Q. Which of your five senses tends to diminish as you get older?
A. Charley Weaver: My sense of decency.

Q. In Hawaiian, does it take more than three words to say 'I Love You'?
A. Vincent Price: No, you can say it with a pineapple and a twenty.

Q. What are 'Do It,' 'I Can Help,' and 'I Can't Get Enough'?
A. George Gobel: I don't know, but it's coming from the next apartment.

Q. As you grow older, do you tend to gesture more or less with your hands while talking?
A. Rose Marie: You ask me one more growing old question Peter, and I'll give you a gesture you'll never forget.

Q. Paul, why do Hell's Angels wear leather?
A. Paul Lynde: Because chiffon wrinkles too easily.

Q.. Charley, you've just decided to grow strawberries. Are you going to get any during the first year?
A.. Charley Weaver: Of course not, I'm too busy growing strawberries.

Q. In bowling, what's a perfect score?
A. Rose Marie: Ralph, the pin boy.

Q. It is considered in bad taste to discuss two subjects at nudist camps.. One is politics, what is the other?
A. Paul Lynde: Tape measures.

Q. During a tornado, are you safer in the bedroom or in the closet?
A. Rose Marie: Unfortunately Peter, I'm always safe in the bedroom.

Q. Can boys join the Camp Fire Girls?
A.. Marty Allen: Only after lights out.

Q. When you pat a dog on its head he will wag his tail. What will a goose do?
A. Paul Lynde: Make him bark?

Q. If you were pregnant for two years, what would you give birth to?
A. Paul Lynde: Whatever it is, it would never be afraid of the dark.

Q. According to Ann Landers, is there anything wrong with getting into the habit of kissing a lot of people?
A. Charley Weaver: It got me out of the army.

Q. It is the most abused and neglected part of your body, what is it?
A. Paul Lynde: Mine may be abused, but it certainly isn't neglected.

Q. Back in the old days, when Great Grandpa put horseradish on his head, what was he trying to do?
A. George Gobel: Get it in his mouth.

Q. Who stays pregnant for a longer period of time, your wife or your elephant?
A. Paul Lynde: Who told you about my elephant?

Q. When a couple have a baby, who is responsible for its sex?
A.. Charley Weaver: I'll lend him the car, the rest is up to him.

Q. Jackie Gleason recently revealed that he firmly believes in them and has actually seen them on at least two occasions. What are they?
A. Charley Weaver: His feet.

Q.. According to Ann Landers, what are two things you should never do in bed?
A. Paul Lynde: Point and laugh.

WE DON'T STOP LAUGHING BECAUSE WE GROW OLD,
WE GROW OLD BECAUSE WE STOP LAUGHING

[hardscrabble]

PS: PM me with the coordinates of where to meet... I can't leave Stumpwater, TX, for at least 20 minutes so give me some lead time:)

I don't drink with Texans.



Ha. Us Tennesseans been drinkin' with Texans since before the Alamo. Here you go. Ought to be good for top shelf IPA's for at least the next ten days.

Skinning skills optional, but leg holding required.

35.89207,-86.10245

Bawanna, you're welcome, too. You whack with the ACP, I'll drag em up on the porch.

[mr surveyor]

I don't drink with Texans.



Ha. Us Tennesseans been drinkin' with Texans since before the Alamo. Here you go. Ought to be good for top shelf IPA's for at least the next ten days.

Skinning skills optional, but leg holding required.

35.89207,-86.10245

Bawanna, you're welcome, too. You whack with the ACP, I'll drag em up on the porch.


mrs surv was born and raised in the Nashville area.... I know what a "Pike" is, and I know what a "hose pipe" is.... so, do I get a reprieve:D

[hardscrabble]

Here's my ink pen....sign rye cheer.

[JFootin]

Farm Kid...

A farmer drove to a neighbor's farmhouse and knocked at the door.

A boy, about 9, opened the door.

"Is your dad or mom home?" said the farmer.

"No, they went to town" said the boy.

"How about your brother, Howard? Is he here?" asked the farmer.

"No, he went with Mom and Dad" the boy answered.

The farmer stood there for a few minutes, shifting from one foot to
the other,and mumbling to himself.

"I know where all the tools are, if you want to borrow one, or I can
give Dad a message" said the boy.

"Well," said the farmer uncomfortably, "I really wanted to talk to your Dad. It's about your brother Howard getting my daughter Suzy pregnant".

The boy thought for a moment...

"You would have to talk to Dad about that. I know he charges $500 for the bull and $50 for the pig, but I don't know how much he charges for Howard."

[wyntrout]

FUNNY!

Wynn:D

[mr surveyor]

mrs surv even laughed:)

[wyntrout]

I wonder if this is for real??:eek: WTF??

http://fromthetrenchesworldreport.com/homeland-security-graduates-first-corps-of-obamas-brown-shirts-homeland-youth/23898/

As for 18-24-year-olds being kids... they are the bulk of our frontline troops... hardly children!

Then there's this:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=rO72uExwDCA

Wynn:(

[MikeyKahr]

35.89207,-86.10245

Bawanna, you're welcome, too. You whack with the ACP, I'll drag em up on the porch.

I could whack some too with my pm9. Not as efficient as the ACP. I could be there in a half hour, a might longer if I have to swing by to pick up uncle Bawanna and his fish. Good luck to you hunting in them thar hills.

[Tinman507]

http://i1147.photobucket.com/albums/o542/tinman507/oddcouplecopy.png

[hardscrabble]

mrs surv was born and raised in the Nashville area.... I know what a "Pike" is, and I know what a "hose pipe" is.... so, do I get a reprieve:D

Mrs. Scrabble was born and raised in Farmers Branch, which IIRC is just outside Houston. Does Houston still belong to Texas? Their football team moved to Nashville, but I don't quite remember what happened to the rest of them. Or maybe FB is right outside of Fort Worth. I'm pretty sure Fort Worth still belongs to Texas. All those great big Texas cities kind of run together.

I try not to remind Mrs. S about her Texas heritage too often...when she thinks about it too much her feet get a little big for her boots and she starts wearing too much hat for the number of cows she owns (since she has zero cows).

I was forced to start sharpening my wit in regard to Texas as a defense mechanism against an old USMC buddy from Ft. Worth. He once gave me one of these maps, so I could find TX if I needed to for some reason. It pretty much sums up is attitude.

http://i854.photobucket.com/albums/ab101/cyriltaylor/TXMap.jpg

[hardscrabble]

I could whack some too with my pm9. Not as efficient as the ACP. I could be there in a half hour, a might longer if I have to swing by to pick up uncle Bawanna and his fish. Good luck to you hunting in them thar hills.

You could be there fast! All you'd really have to do is find the end of the pipe that brings in sun light, then follow that. Alternatively, you could just drive to Murfreesboro, head generally east until you come to Nowhere, then look for the ass end of that. The cabin is right there close to the A.E. of N.

If you go after the smoked salmon, er... Uncle Bawanna, first, I'll split the gas bill with you on that first 50 miles.

[mr surveyor]

I wonder if this is for real??:eek: WTF??

http://fromthetrenchesworldreport.com/homeland-security-graduates-first-corps-of-obamas-brown-shirts-homeland-youth/23898/

As for 18-24-year-olds being kids... they are the bulk of our frontline troops... hardly children!

Then there's this:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=rO72uExwDCA

Wynn:(



I wish I hadn't broken my personal policy to not blindly follow posted links.

[Bawanna]

Thanks for the heads up. I was going to but now I'm gonna just move on.

[JFootin]

http://www.wsbradio.com/gallery/entertainment/boortz-funnies-gun-posters/g58n/#2829549

[wyntrout]

OH YEAH! Why are there no flashes from those muzzles! And, I hope he has some silver bullets!

http://media.cmgdigital.com/shared/img/photos/2012/10/30/d5/47/7867c426-c7db-459b-ac6d-809ccfa610cb.jpg

Wynn:D

[mr surveyor]

Thanks for the heads up. I was going to but now I'm gonna just move on.


I figure that there are some sites you just don'twant to leave your footprints on. And that was one I certainly don't want any association with.

[TucsonMTB]

I figure that there are some sites you just don'twant to leave your footprints on. And that was one I certainly don't want any association with.
If you use FireFox as your browser, you might find DoNotTrackPlus useful. It is a browser add-on, so it only works in FireFox, but it seems to effectively intercept the tracking processes when you visit a web site. The local process keeps track of the number of interceptions. In the several weeks it has been on this computer that number is over 80,000! :eek:

It is kind of fun the frustrate the marketing applications, including Google, that track you.

http://www.abine.com/ or search for DoNotTrackPlus (all one word works well) if you prefer to read about it, rather than go to a "blind link". ;)

[Starbug]

Well, Halloween is over. No kids came this year (we've only ever had one), so all the candy is now officially ours! Mmmm, chocolate! We only buy what we like because we always get stuck with it.

This year's candy collection consists of: whoppers, butterfinger, Hershey's chocolate with almonds, and Reeses cups. It's a different assortment every year.

Holidays are delicious.

[Bawanna]

If you use FireFox as your browser, you might find DoNotTrackPlus useful. It is a browser add-on, so it only works in FireFox, but it seems to effectively intercept the tracking processes when you visit a web site. The local process keeps track of the number of interceptions. In the several weeks it has been on this computer that number is over 80,000! :eek:

It is kind of fun the frustrate the marketing applications, including Google, that track you.

http://www.abine.com/ or search for DoNotTrackPlus (all one word works well) if you prefer to read about it, rather than go to a "blind link". ;)

Good stuff. I just added on the add on. Puts a little counter in the corner to tell you how many people are trailing ya.

[PYROhafe]

If you use FireFox as your browser, you might find DoNotTrackPlus useful. It is a browser add-on, so it only works in FireFox, but it seems to effectively intercept the tracking processes when you visit a web site. The local process keeps track of the number of interceptions. In the several weeks it has been on this computer that number is over 80,000! :eek:

It is kind of fun the frustrate the marketing applications, including Google, that track you.

http://www.abine.com/ or search for DoNotTrackPlus (all one word works well) if you prefer to read about it, rather than go to a "blind link". ;)

Excellent program! Just installed it, and it works fine with IE at least for me. Thanks for the info!

[JFootin]

A crusty old Marine Sergeant Major found himself at a gala event hosted by a local liberal arts college. There was no shortage of extremely young idealistic ladies in attendance, one of whom approached the Sergeant Major for conversation.

"Excuse me, Sergeant Major, but you seem to be a very serious man. Is something bothering you?"

"Negative, ma'am. Just serious by nature."

The young lady looked at his awards and decorations and said, "It looks like you have seen a lot of action."

"Yes, ma'am, a lot of action."

The young lady, tiring of trying to start up a conversation, said, "You know, you should lighten up a little. Relax and enjoy yourself." The Sergeant Major just stared at her in his serious manner. Finally the young lady said, "You know, I hope you don't take this the wrong way, but when is the last time you had sex?"

"1955, ma'am."

"Well, there you are. You really need to chill out and quit taking everything so seriously! I mean, no sex since 1955!"

She took his hand and led him to a private room where she proceeded to "relax" him several times. Afterwards, panting for breath, she leaned against his bare chest and said, "Wow, you sure didn't forget much since 1955!"

The Sergeant Major, glancing at his watch, said in his serious voice, "I hope not, it's only 2130 now."

(Don't ya love military time?)

[MW surveyor]

Well, Halloween is over. No kids came this year (we've only ever had one), so all the candy is now officially ours! Mmmm, chocolate! We only buy what we like because we always get stuck with it.

This year's candy collection consists of: whoppers, butterfinger, Hershey's chocolate with almonds, and Reeses cups. It's a different assortment every year.

Holidays are delicious.

No kids for Halloween? Probably got eaten by that cougar.

[Tinman507]

You're calling Starbug a cougar? :eek:

[MW surveyor]

Hey! Wake up Tinman. Just that Starbug has been writing about a real cougar/puma/panther/catermount/mountain lion in her neighborhood.

Since I don't know how old Starbug is, it'd be hard to call her a cougar over the internet. Not only that, since I'll never see 60 again just about any female under that age is a young lady. just say'in :)

[kahrseye]

And then there's this.....

[Planedude]

And then there's this.....

Now thats just funny and I don't care who ya are...:rolleyes:

[Don K.]

2 more weeks and its out to the mountains for the hunt.

I drew a Archery Bull Elk tag Nov 16-29...me and 3 guys from work are hunting together for the first time. Got the x-bow out and flung some arrows yesterday. Gonna be hitting the archery range quite a bit til I leave town.

Staring to get Elk fever!!!

[TucsonMTB]

2 more weeks and its out to the mountains for the hunt.

I drew a Archery Bull Elk tag Nov 16-29...me and 3 guys from work are hunting together for the first time. Got the x-bow out and flung some arrows yesterday. Gonna be hitting the archery range quite a bit til I leave town.

Staring to get Elk fever!!!
Best of luck with that! :)

Back when I was good with a bow, I used to hunt whitetails in Pennsylvania. It turned out to be harder than it looks.

Notice that I didn't mention bagging any myself. Of the crew I hunted with, only one guy dropped one. We kidded him a lot about the three arrows he shot after it went down. They were all embedded deeply in the rocky soil just above the fallen button buck. Two of the three creased him, but the deer didn't care. The first shot was a nearly perfect heart shot.

Those smaller deer are definitely good eating. I was successful at helping with that part. :D

[TucsonMTB]

http://viewsfromtucson.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/11/Poinsettia-Web.jpg

Halloween is barely over and we are already seeing preparations for Christmas, even on our front patio.

But, I think I will wait a while to hang the lights. :lol:

[JFootin]

The Shredder

A young engineer was leaving the office at 5:45 p.m. when he found the CEO standing in front of a shredder with a piece of paper in his hand.

"Listen," said the CEO, "this is a very sensitive and important document, and my secretary is not here. Can you make this thing work?"

"Certainly," said the young engineer. He turned on the machine, inserted the paper, and pressed the start button.

"Excellent, excellent!" said the CEO as his paper disappeared inside the machine, "I just need one copy."

D'oh! http://www.taurusarmed.net/forums/images/smilies/bang.gif Of course, who do you think the CEO will blame?!

[JFootin]

Silence is Golden

Grandma and Grandpa are sitting at church on Easter Sunday, and Grandma leans over and whispers, "I just let out a silent fart, what should I do?"

Grandpa leans back and replies, "You should get new batteries for your hearing aids!"

[JFootin]

Rest in Peace

Aging Aunt Mildred was a 93-year-old woman who was particularly despondent over the recent death of her husband. She decided that she would just kill herself and join him in death. Thinking that it would be best to get it over with quickly, she took out his old Army pistol and made the decision to shoot herself in the heart, since it was badly broken in the first place.

Not wanting to miss the vital organ and become a vegetable and a burden to someone, she called her doctor's office to inquire as to just exactly where the heart would be on a woman. The doctor said, 'Your heart would be just below your left breast.'

Later that night......Mildred was admitted to the hospital with a gunshot wound to her knee.

[GROTMAN]

Three Kicks
A big-city, anti-gun lawyer went duck hunting in rural Texas. He shot and dropped a bird, but it fell into a farmer's field on the other side of a fence. As the lawyer climbed over the fence, an elderly farmer drove up on his tractor and asked him what he was doing. The litigator responded, "I shot a duck and it fell into this field, and now I'm going to retrieve it." The old farmer replied, "This is my property, and you are not coming over here." The indignant lawyer said, "I am one of the best trial attorneys in the U.S. and, if you don't let me get that duck, I'll sue you and take everything you own."
The old farmer smiled and said, "Apparently, you don't know how we do things in Texas. We settle small disagreements like this with the Texas Three-Kick Rule." The lawyer asked, "What is the Texas Three-Kick Rule?" The Farmer replied, "Well, first I kick you three times and then you kick me three times, and so on, back and forth, until someone gives up."
The attorney quickly thought about the proposed contest and decided that he could easily take the old codger. He agreed to abide by the local custom. The old farmer slowly climbed down from the tractor and walked up to the city feller. His first kick planted the toe of his heavy work boot into the lawyer's groin and dropped him to his knees. His second kick nearly wiped the man's nose off his face. The barrister was flat on his belly when the farmer's third kick to a kidney nearly caused him to give up. The lawyer summoned every bit of his will and managed to get to his feet and said, "Okay, you old coot! Now, it's my turn!"
The old farmer smiled and said, "No, I give up. You can have the duck!"

[wyntrout]

I'm not saying this is a good deal or anything, but I ran across this ad for a used Black PM9 slide with Night Sights on eBay. I think someone was considering something like this and I don't think it would be good for me to put it on the Marketplace, but in case anyone is interested, I'm going to post the URL. I'm not endorsing this, but listing it in case anyone is looking for something like this.

http://i.ebayimg.com/t/Kahr-PM9-PM-9-CM9-Black-Diamond-Slide-With-Tritium-Night-Sights-/00/s/NzQ2WDk5OQ==/$(KGrHqZHJDoFBPWS(O12BQf6-CcBhg~~60_12.JPG

http://i.ebayimg.com/t/Kahr-PM9-PM-9-CM9-Black-Diamond-Slide-With-Tritium-Night-Sights-/00/s/NzQ2WDk5OQ==/$(KGrHqRHJFUFBh)GQSEsBQf6-Iz3Hw~~60_12.JPG

Kahr PM9 PM 9 CM9 Black Diamond Slide with Tritium Night Sights | eBay (http://www.ebay.com/itm/Kahr-PM9-PM-9-CM9-Black-Diamond-Slide-With-Tritium-Night-Sights-/300798128345?pt=LH_DefaultDomain_0&hash=item4608f730d9)

Wynn:)

[jocko]

nice job wyn, I remembertalso some one asking about a slide etc. I bet an offer of $200 would take tht slide off that owners hands.

He ius dealing with a very very liimited amunt of people who would even beinterested, let alone able to find it on ebay..
\good post..

[JFootin]

The day that Albert Einstein feared is upon us.
(you may need to click twice to enlarge the image)


http://i1230.photobucket.com/albums/ee486/John_England/Misc/40059d1352156845-post-your-funny-pi.jpg

[JFootin]

Will that Tattoo still be a good idea in 5, 10 or 20 years?

http://tips21.com/videos/images/must-be-this-tall-to-ride-tattoo-hot-girls-pics.jpg

[JFootin]

Great Sign


http://i1230.photobucket.com/albums/ee486/John_England/Misc/39850d1351904156-great-sign-57aff93.jpg

Kind of hard to see but it's a perfect sign to see.

[Tinman507]

http://demotivationalpost.com/motivators/11760759370/first-ladies.jpg

[JFootin]

I had to send my Taurus 738 TCP 380 back to the mothership because
of multiple FTFs, FTRBs and trigger problems. Taurus CS was very polite
and offered to send me a label and have FedEx pick it up at my door.
FedEx just delivered my TCP back from Taurus. A few minutes after-
ward, I got the phone notification of a delivery requiring a signature. :rolleyes:

I sent it off on 10/23, back 11/6 - 2 week turnaround. Very good!

Repair slip says:

Problem Found............................................. .......................Resolution

MISFIRE - Trigger bar releases hammer too soon.................REPLACED

MISFEED - Extractor calibration under specs.........................ADJUSTED

MISFEED - Magazine lips calibration under specs..................ADJUSTED

The last 2 were things covered in the sticky on TaurusArmed.net. I
put one bullet in each of my 3 mags, and the bullet rides higher in
the one I sent to them. Obviously, they opened the lips up a bit.
I'll adjust the other 2 to match. They did the needed adjustment to
the extractor. The trigger bar replacement is not too much of a
surprise. I knew there was something wrong in there.

As soon as we get some warmer weather, I will go test it out.

[MikeyKahr]

http://demotivationalpost.com/motivators/11760759370/first-ladies.jpg

Costanza, you have done it again.

[wyntrout]

Madame Sarkozy has many talents... including singing... and nude modelling in her YOUNGER days! But with their "immigrant Arab population" that may be changing!

http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_nm_twk1GnQ0/TTAOvhPtRMI/AAAAAAAAAHM/ngprbrfxjso/s640/sarkozy-wife-complete.gif

Wynn:w00t:

[O'Dell]

I'll take Spain. There's no way I'll pick anything French.

[MW surveyor]

at the range today.

First the good
The Dawson Precision fiber optic sight that I put on my Ruger Single Six was awesome! Looked like the thing was on fire and very easy to focus my poor vision on the sight. Shot from a rest at 15 yards put the rounds right into the bullseye with a spread of about 1" (and a couple of called fliers). Offhand the groups opened up a bit but still within 1 to 1 3/4". I am please with the minor investment and endorse these sights (FWIW).

Now the meh
Had not shot the CW9 for at least 2 months and it really showed on the first 25 rounds or so. All on the target but looked like a shotgun pattern. Buckled down and remembered technique and things did get better. Gonna have to go back with the 1911 to make myself feel better. ;)

Order in for a Williams rear peep and fiber optic front sight for the 10/22. Not sure how long it will take to get here. Has to be better form me to see than the stock sights.

[Bawanna]

I'll take Spain. There's no way I'll pick anything French.

Ok, I'm good with Blue I'll take her, guess that leave the US for Jocko. All American boy.

[Tinman507]

https://sphotos-a.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash3/599194_10151216789302767_479796401_n.jpg

[MikeyKahr]

Ok, I'm good with Blue I'll take her, guess that leave the US for Jocko. All American boy.

Here it comes...

[jocko]

I'll take Spain. There's no way I'll pick anything French.

not me the spain woman don't shave under their arms, Hair in their ears that u can braid. they smell like fokking olives.. Other than that, yup they are table grade.

Now the French woman have NO HAIR ANYWHERE. their hsbands are all cowards, we know that. They smell like fresh roses and yup table grade.

Now Italian women, well add all of the above and mix them with some fine home made wine with a big plate of salami (sliced)_. Italian women appreciate a NICE SALAMI. And a nice Gondola boat ride down the cesspool canals of venice and u have , UH, LAW LAW:D

[jocko]

Here it comes...

had to walk down the street with woman #3 Far fat right, I would also wear a towel over my face to. that is the reason women over there wear towels over their heads. Theur hubby know they are so fokking ugly they are just trying to spare us the grief. Seems no one told Michells .. Just sayin.

[jocko]

https://sphotos-a.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash3/599194_10151216789302767_479796401_n.jpg

that head and u have a real hottie. That body is definitely not with the head. U can replace the body, u can't replace UGLY:popcorn:

[JFootin]

A RETIREE'S LAST TRIP TO KROGER





Yesterday I was at my local Kroger buying a large bag of Purina dog chow for my loyal pet, Jake, the Wonder Dog and was in the check-out line when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog.





What did she think I had an elephant?





So because I'm retired and have little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I was starting the Purina Diet again. I added that I probably shouldn't, because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.





I told her that it was essentially a Perfect Diet and that the way that it works is, to load your pants pockets with Purina Nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my story.)





Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care, because the dog food poisoned me. I told her no, I stopped to Pee on a Fire Hydrant and a car hit me.





I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was Laughing so hard.





Kroger won't let me shop there anymore. Better watch what you ask retired people. They have all the time in the World to think of crazy things to say.

[jocko]

good one JFootin, dumb b!tch, she outta know that u only eat one pocket full of Purina a day...

[JFootin]

What the world is coming to.


A couple from Minneapolis decided to go to Florida to thaw out during a particularly icy winter. They planned to stay at the very same hotel where they spent their honeymoon 20 years earlier. Because of their hectic schedules, it was difficult to coordinate their travel plans so the husband left Minnesota and flew to Florida on Thursday, with his wife flying down the following day. The husband checked into the hotel. There was a computer in the room so he decided to send an email to his wife. However, he accidentally left out one letter of her email address, and without realizing his error, sent the email.

Meanwhile somewhere in Houston, a widow had just returned from her husband's funeral. He was a minister of many years and was called home to glory following a sudden heart attack. The widow decided to check her email, expecting messages of condolences from friends and relatives. After reading the first message she screamed and then fainted. The widow's son rushed into the room, found his mother on the floor, and saw the computer screen, which read:

To: My Loving Wife
Subject: I've Arrived
Date: 10 Jan 2010

I know you are surprised to hear from me. They have computers here now and you are allowed to send emails to your loved ones. I've just arrived and been checked in. I see that everything is prepared for your arrival tomorrow. Looking forward to seeing you then. Hope your journey is as uneventful as mine.

P.S. Sure is hot down here!

[JFootin]

Think this will keep them away?

http://www.taurusarmed.net/forums/attachments/funny-farm/40172d1352257486-post-your-funny-pics-part-three-its-not-hard-doberman.jpg

[TucsonMTB]

Think this will keep them away?

http://www.taurusarmed.net/forums/attachments/funny-farm/40172d1352257486-post-your-funny-pics-part-three-its-not-hard-doberman.jpg
I dunno . . . this keeps me away. ;)

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[Barth]

http://wac.450f.edgecastcdn.net/80450F/screencrush.com/files/2012/10/skyfall-clip.jpg?w=625&h=0&zc=1&s=0&a=t&q=89

[GROTMAN]

Pyrohafe after a year of so of marriage :)

http://uberhumor.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/05/demotivational-posters-meanwhile9.jpg (http://uberhumor.com/top-demotivational-posters-of-the-day-12-pictures)

[MW surveyor]

http://wac.450f.edgecastcdn.net/80450F/screencrush.com/files/2012/10/skyfall-clip.jpg?w=625&h=0&zc=1&s=0&a=t&q=89

Thanks Barth. After seeing this I know I'm not dead yet!

[OldLincoln]

Must be too late for me. Sigh.....

[MW surveyor]

Must be too late for me. Sigh.....

I hope not.

[Armybrat]

http://www.strangepolitics.com/images/content/185757.jpg

[Armybrat]

My son's friends caught some nice Yellowfin tunas off Venice, Louisiana the other day - the one on the right weighed in at 280 pounds:

http://i522.photobucket.com/albums/w349/ScoPro/Armybrat3/20121017_145828.jpg

[Bawanna]

Wow, thats a lot of tuna fish. Must be a blast to catch.

[mr surveyor]

that's a lot of cat food right there

[Tinman507]

no sir, that's a lotta sushi and/or cash money

[TucsonMTB]

http://aviationhumor.net/wp-content/uploads/2010/10/AviationHumor-0081.jpg

[ltxi]

Back in the day, before suffrage, WWII, and subsequent political correctness and all that other male suppression/subjugation bs, the operative terms were Husband / wife.

[Scoundrel]

In the beginning there was the computer. And God said
%>Let there be light!
#Enter user id.
%>God
#Enter password.
%>Omniscient
#Password incorrect. Try again.
%>Omnipotent
#Password incorrect. Try again.
%>Technocrat

#And God logged on at 12:01:00 AM, Sunday, March 1.

%>Let there be light!
#Unrecognizable command. Try again.
%>Create light
#Done
%>Run heaven and earth

#And God created Day and Night. And God saw there were 0 errors. #And God
logged off at 12:02:00 AM, Sunday, March 1. #Approx. funds remaining: $92.50.
#And God logged on at 12:01:00 AM, Monday, March 2.

%>Let there be firmament in the midst of water and light
#Unrecognizable command. Try again.
%>Create firmament
#Done.
%>Run firmament

#And God divided the waters. And God saw there were 0 errors. #And God logged
off at 12:02:00 AM, Monday, March 2. #Approx. funds remaining: $84.60.
#And God logged on at 12:01:00 AM, Tuesday, March 3.

%>Let the waters under heaven be gathered together unto one place and let the
dry land appear and
#Too many characters in specification string. Try again.
%>Create dry_land
#Done.
%>Run firmament

#And God divided the waters. And God saw there were 0 errors. #And God logged
off at 12:02:00 AM, Tuesday, March 3. #Approx. funds remaining: $65.00.
#And God logged on at 12:01:00 AM, Wednesday, March 4.

%>Create lights in the firmament to divide the day from the night
#Unspecified type. Try again.
%>Create sun_moon_stars
#Done
%>Run sun_moon_stars

#And God divided the waters. And God saw there were 0 errors. #And God logged
off at 12:02:00 AM, Wednesday, March 4. #Approx. funds remaining: $54.00.
#And God logged on at 12:01:00 AM, Thursday, March 5.

%>Create fish
#Done
%>Create fowl
#Done
%>Run fish, fowl

#And God created the great sea monsters and every living creature that
creepeth wherewith the waters swarmed after its kind and every
winged fowl after its kind. And God saw there were 0 errors.
#And God logged off at 12:02:00 AM, Thursday, March 5.
#Approx. funds remaining: $45.00.
#And God logged on at 12:01:00 AM, Friday, March 6.

%>Create cattle
#Done
%>Create creepy_things
#Done
%>Now let us make man in our image
#Unspecified type. Try again.
%>Create man
#Done
%>Be fruitful and multiply and replenish the earth and subdue it and have
dominion over the fish of the sea and over the fowl of the air and
over every living thing that creepeth upon the earth
#Too many command operands. Try again.
%>Run multiplication
#Execution terminated. 6 errors.
%>Insert breath
#Done
%>Run multiplication
#Execution terminated. 5 errors.
%>Move man to Garden of Eden
#File Garden of Eden does not exist.
%>Create Garden.edn
#Done
%>Move man to Garden.edn
#Done
%>Run multiplication
#Execution terminated. 4 errors.
%>Copy woman from man
#Done
%>Run multiplication
#Execution terminated. 3 errors.
%>Insert woman into man
#Illegal parameters. Try again.
%>Insert man into woman
#Done
%>Run multiplication
#Execution terminated. 2 errors.
%>Create desire
#Done
%>Run multiplication

#And God saw man and woman being fruitful and multiplying in Garden.edn
#Warning: No time limit on this run. 1 errors.

%>Create freewill
#Done
%>Run freewill

#And God saw man and woman being fruitful and multiplying in Garden.edn
#Warning: No time limit on this run. 1 errors.

%>Undo desire
#Desire cannot be undone once freewill is created.
%>Destroy freewill
#Freewill is an inaccessible file and cannot be destroyed.
#Enter replacement, cancel, or ask for help.
%>Help
#Desire cannot be undone once freewill is created.
#Freewill is an inaccessible file and cannot be destroyed.
#Enter replacement, cancel, or ask for help.
%>Create tree_of_knowledge

#And God saw man and woman being fruitful and multiplying in Garden.edn
#Warning: No time limit on this run. 1 errors.

%>Create good, evil
#Done
%>Activate evil

#And God saw he had created shame.
#Warning system error in sector E95. Man and woman not in Garden.edn. 1
errors.

%>Scan Garden.edn for man, woman
#Search failed.
%>Delete shame
#Shame cannot be deleted once evil has been activated.
%>Destroy freewill
#Freewill is an inaccessible file and cannot be destroyed.
#Enter replacement, cancel, or ask for help.
%>Stop
#Unrecognizable command. Try again
%>Break
%>Break
%>Break

#ATTENTION ALL USERS *** ATTENTION ALL USERS: COMPUTER GOING DOWN FOR REGULAR
DAY OF MAINTENANCE AND REST IN FIVE MINUTES. PLEASE LOG OFF.

%>Create new world
#You have exceeded your allocated file space. You must destroy old files
before new ones can be created.
%>Destroy earth
#Destroy earth: Please confirm.
%>

#COMPUTER DOWN *** COMPUTER DOWN. SERVICES WILL RESUME SUNDAY, MARCH 8 AT
6:00 AM. YOU MUST SIGN OFF NOW.

#And God logged off at 11.59.59 PM, Friday, March 6.
#Approx. funds remaining: $0.00.

[TucsonMTB]

#And God logged on at 12:01:00 AM, Sunday, March 1.
. . .

I like it! Well done, sir! http://home.mindspring.com/~justsomeguy/thumbsup.gif

[Scoundrel]

Thanks!

Wish I could say it was mine, but I stole it from a dialup computer Bulletin Board System (what we had before the Internet) many years ago.

[TucsonMTB]

dialup computer Bulletin Board System (what we had before the Internet) many years ago.
Yeah. I've been around long enough to have wasted a lot of time at a screaming 2400 baud myself. But . . . I do not recognize the command prompt symbols "%>". Admittedly, I have forgotten everything from the Dec VAX world in which I lived decades ago . . . probably just as well. :o

[wyntrout]

Online porn used to be a lot slower. "High res'" pictures could take 30 to 45 minutes, or MORE!:eek:

Wynn:D

[Scoundrel]

Yeah. I've been around long enough to have wasted a lot of time at a screaming 2400 baud myself. But . . . I do not recognize the command prompt symbols "%>". Admittedly, I have forgotten everything from the Dec VAX world in which I lived decades ago . . . probably just as well. :o

The syntax in this sequence was meant to emulate a shell connection to a mainframe connection, back when people did not own their own computers, they purchased time on someone else's mainframe, such as a university. That's why there are references to dollar amounts remaining as well.

I've never worked on a mainframe myself. My first "real" PC was a KayPro II running CP/M, which I had for a few months before buying a 286 clone with a 2400 baud modem and a 20 megabyte hard drive, running DOS 5.

My first online porn was ascii art, which I then printed on a dot matrix printer.

[Scoundrel]

If anyone here does not know what ascii art is, go to Google and do a search for "ascii art". If you want to see how that translates to porn, well, I'm sure you can figure it out.

[wyntrout]

Late '69/early '70, I majored in computer science for about a year and gave up because they didn't have enough real instructors... educators. It wasn't much fun sticking decks of cards in the IBM 360 and waiting for it to get to your input... and not get any... or much output! Later on with the TRS80 16K and then the Model III with 32K RAM... and my custom-added double-sided 360K drives... I dabbled in BASIC and wrote programs and edited game programs, but there wasn't any video worth a darn for some time.

I once sent a TRS80 cassette tape recorded computer program over the air to another amateur radio buddy. It seemed like I had accomplished something, since he could record with a cassette and then print out the received program... late 70's.

That was back before them new-fangled Betamax/VCR thingies came out! We had just gotten our first color TV in 1974!

Wynn:)

[TucsonMTB]

The syntax in this sequence was meant to emulate a shell connection to a mainframe connection, back when people did not own their own computers, they purchased time on someone else's mainframe, such as a university. That's why there are references to dollar amounts remaining as well.
Ah . . . that makes sense. I thought I recognized the syntax, but not the command prompt itself.


I've never worked on a mainframe myself.
I have. But, it was a TSO MVSXA environment owned by my client, a New Jersey public utility. So, I never saw a bill. Mostly worked in the ISPF rather than at a command prompt. Man, that was ages ago.


My first "real" PC was a KayPro II running CP/M, which I had for a few months before buying a 286 clone with a 2400 baud modem and a 20 megabyte hard drive, running DOS 5.
Sounds familiar. After lots of time building networked Clipper applications on client's DOS machines, our first "home computer" was a Wyse 286. My wife and I still laugh about the $700, 40 megabyte, Seagate drive I talked her into letting me buy because it was "so big we will never need another drive." http://home.mindspring.com/~justsomeguy/icon_lol.gif

Now, her little hand held has more RAM than that . . . :rolleyes:

[MW surveyor]

Hate to admit but I remember when a Commodore 64 had more computing power and was faster than an IBM. (That's 64 k of ram to you younger guys)

[QuercusMax]

I learned programming on an IBM 1130 that had 8K of memory, a single 14" removable disk drive that took 90 seconds to spin up, and that used punched cards for input. Amazingly, the OS and FORTRAN compiler all fit into that 8K of memory, albeit with overlays. Stack your deck in the card reader on top of the jobs waiting in front of yours and then wait a few minutes for your printout. I've also toggled instructions into the switches on the input panel, 16 or 32 bits at a time.

Of course back then I had to ride my horse to the computer center, too.

Kids these days have it so easy.

[CrabbyAzz]

A friend of mine had his receipt for 4K of ram framed and hanging above his desk. Price was $400....

[JFootin]

Yeah. I've been around long enough to have wasted a lot of time at a screaming 2400 baud myself. But . . . I do not recognize the command prompt symbols "%>". Admittedly, I have forgotten everything from the Dec VAX world in which I lived decades ago . . . probably just as well. :o

I spent all of my abbreviated second career doing systems analysis and software design on Dec VAX computers. I worked with C language and Decwindows, which was like trying to play chess in about 6 dimensions!


Late '69/early '70, I majored in computer science for about a year and gave up because they didn't have enough real instructors... educators. It wasn't much fun sticking decks of cards in the IBM 360 and waiting for it to get to your input... and not get any... or much output! ...

Wynn:)

Yeah, my first venture into computer science was feeding cards to an IBM 360 at a trade school. I quit after a 1 1/2 month bout of bronchitis, then pursued a sales career for about a decade. In my mid-30s, I went back to college and got a batchelor's degree in Computer Science. My second career launched me like a rocket and I was working for a Fortune 50 company in just 2 years. After 14 years, my career came to an abrupt end because of advancing disability and the evil hearts of some corporate polititians. So now I am on Disability and living in Appalachia, clinging to my bible and my guns. LOL! :behindsofa:

[wyntrout]

I have my front security camera feeding my computer room TV and I can see our flag waving out front... much better than the camera's 4" wireless monitor... wind about 5 mph from the WSW.

I heard about the Commodore 64 and took one back to West Germany with me when I returned from my first leave on that tour(1983). Those were fantastic... great color and video... quite a change from the Radio Shack TRS80's... still used floppy drives, though.

I got mine on sale at Toys 'R' Us in the DC area... visiting my kids.

Wynn:)

[OldLincoln]

Walll.... not to be outdone by you younguns, I started out with signal fires but the bandwidth was limited and reliable transmission was only at night. Then along came drums and we were really tickled over that let me tell you. Full time transmission but it got more complicated because you have to add headers and footers to know who was sending the signal. Then the environmentalists spoiled it all by convincing the chiefs (who always seemed to have a headache) that drums were destroying the hunting grounds. So once drums were outlawed only outlaws had them. The big dogs (aka dinosaurs) were pissed at the noise and hunted down the outlaw drummers and that pretty much ended out internet ver 1.0. Of course the gods wanted us to have internet so he tossed that big rock down and wiped those big dogs out like right now. Got most of us by accident I'm sure but it was quite a mess.

Well things went along like that until some smart ass named Al Gore was messing around in his garage and invented internet v 2.0. Then is was soon out of control and that's why the world will end next month. Pretty clear to me that god doesn't want no internet. Has a notion that folks ought to live in tribes and communicate face to face and join together to work hard for the tribes benefit.

So when it all comes down next month you know why. As for me, I decided what the hell and went off my diet. If the Aztecs got it wrong I'll have a few more pounds, but if they're right I won't regret my last days.

PS: Ain't retirement great... I can do this crap all day long!

[JFootin]

ps: Ain't retirement great... I can do this crap all day long!

+1! :d

[wyntrout]

honor defense honour defence. Dang! I disabled the GB and South African language add-ons AND installed the US English Language add-on and I STILL get misspelling highlighting for the first two words and not for the second two! I'm using the Ubuntu Canonical 1.0 for Firefox and still getting alerts for misspelling on American-spelled words!

Wynn:rolleyes:

[wyntrout]

Here's a happy thought:

http://sphotos-b.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-prn1/554187_10151213340932365_1760140078_n.jpg

Wynn:)

[Scoundrel]

I'd love to see a sign like that around here.

There's a gun shop a few miles from here with about 50 signs on the door saying NO this and NO that and various other codgery things, including a LARGE sign in the middle that says NO LOADED GUNS.

In a GUN SHOP?!

Whatever. I just carry concealed and call it good.

[DeaconKC]

Im old enough to remember when my Chevelle was high tech with a factory AM/FM, underdash Craig 8 track and a Cobra 23 channel CB! Also, had a Commodore Vic 20!

[mr surveyor]

I had a Big Chief tablet, a pencil, and access to a set of World Book Encyclopedias.... and all ten fingers and ten toes

life was simple...life was good:)

Lots of years passed by before I understood why that "nice lady at the counter" was always so upset when my Momma would send me in with the payment for the electric bill. What the hell did I know what that little warning on the bill stub meant...."Do Not Fold, Spindle, Staple or Mutilate". :rolleyes:

[Scoundrel]

I had a Big Chief tablet

Those were made of stone, right?

No, no, my mistake. It was wood.

[Tinman507]

http://cdn.static.ovimg.com/episode/185171.jpg

[wyntrout]

I took a break from college... after two straight years... and worked in data processing in a bank. We used payment cards that were half an IBM punch card and had to process those in the reader/sorter. WHAT A PITA when people folded, mutilated, stapled, and put BLEEPING pieces of tape on the cards!:eek: It's fun... NOT... when you have to stay up all night trying to sort that crap out! And you have two classes the next morning/afternoon! I thought that I would knock out Calculus and some kind of American Literature... lots of reading... while working evenings! That didn't work out very well...ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ!

I learned to appreciate that warning! I also decided at that time to change majors from Computer Science to Mathematics, which I had been taking all along.

Wynn:)

[JFootin]

http://i1230.photobucket.com/albums/ee486/John_England/Misc/40533d1352693704-post-your-funny-pi.jpg

[jlottmc]

Jfootin, you have posted several links lately, not one of them has shown up. It looks like an empty post, and this on two different machines. I'll try back on Chrome, or IE (don't like IE at all) and let you know.

[jlottmc]

Nope, still no bueno on any browser. Best I got was a little thumbnail for a dead link to Taurus Armed in Chrome, and a red x in IE.

[Barth]

I took a break from college... after two straight years... and worked in data processing in a bank. We used payment cards that were half an IBM punch card and had to process those in the reader/sorter. WHAT A PITA when people folded, mutilated, stapled, and put BLEEPING pieces of tape on the cards!:eek: It's fun... NOT... when you have to stay up all night trying to sort that crap out! And you have two classes the next morning/afternoon! I thought that I would knock out Calculus and some kind of American Literature... lots of reading... while working evenings! That didn't work out very well...ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ!

I learned to appreciate that warning! I also decided at that time to change majors from Computer Science to Mathematics, which I had been taking all along.

Wynn:)

Although I never had any interest in computers,
and bought my very first PC last year,
I've been a professional programmer since 1977.
It was a cold choice I made in high school for money, job availability
and a future in a recession.

There's not much fun about it for me.
But it sure does pay the bills.
And still appears to be a strong and growing career path in a recessionary economy.
Of which we appear to have just voted to continue for four more years...

Ops, that's not really a Happy Notion or Thought is it?

[OldLincoln]

I got a Kaypro 2 and quickly got hooked on Colossal Caverns. I actually wore out the 7" floppy drive and got a program that read the alignment so I could adjust it on a regular basis.

Anyway, I was so enamored with the choose and consequence thing that I started writing a supervisor training tool that would offer choices common for personnel issues and the possible consequences then the choices from there with consequences, etc. This was again on a 7" floppy is a really dumb terminal device but that would follow a script with branching. I'd do this after work hours with the vision of a application to teach new supervisors the whole matter of consequences to their decisions. They were good techs and could foresee consequences of technical matters buy usually dumb as a post on personnel matters. Never got to finish it as there were too many branches and not enough floppy disk space. Well that and the few supervisors I had try it never sat at a keyboard before and didn't want to.

[Scoundrel]

Jfootin, you have posted several links lately, not one of them has shown up. It looks like an empty post, and this on two different machines. I'll try back on Chrome, or IE (don't like IE at all) and let you know.

What's going on here is that he is linking images from another forum that requires a login to see the image.

It works fine for him because his browser is set to remember the password, but it does not work for us because we don't have accounts on that forum.

Someone hinted this at him in another thread but I think they were too subtle about it.

[QuercusMax]

For those of you who might have children in college or planning to go there, or are in college yourself, I'd like to mention that all the companies I work with are having a *very* difficult time hiring qualified computer programmers at the moment.

5 - 10 years ago many companies were moving a lot of IT jobs offshore to India and other places, but that trend has quietly reversed in the past 2 - 3 years. My biggest client moved nearly half of its IT workforce to India 6 years ago, but encountered terrible quality and schedule problems, and now has moved almost all of that work back to the US. Now the big problem is finding enough qualified people in this country to take these jobs. Unemployment in the US remains stubbornly high, but not for those with skills and experience in growing areas like programming.

Bottom line: College-bound kids should forget about majoring in English, art history, political science, or women's studies, and go for computer science or almost any type of engineering - because there are lots of good jobs out there in those fields.

[jlottmc]

What's going on here is that he is linking images from another forum that requires a login to see the image.

It works fine for him because his browser is set to remember the password, but it does not work for us because we don't have accounts on that forum.

Someone hinted this at him in another thread but I think they were too subtle about it.


Ahhh, I see thanks for clarifying that.

[Tinman507]

For those of you who might have children in college or planning to go there, or are in college yourself, I'd like to mention that all the companies I work with are having a *very* difficult time hiring qualified computer programmers at the moment.

5 - 10 years ago many companies were moving a lot of IT jobs offshore to India and other places, but that trend has quietly reversed in the past 2 - 3 years. My biggest client moved nearly half of its IT workforce to India 6 years ago, but encountered terrible quality and schedule problems, and now has moved almost all of that work back to the US. Now the big problem is finding enough qualified people in this country to take these jobs. Unemployment in the US remains stubbornly high, but not for those with skills and experience in growing areas like programming.

Bottom line: College-bound kids should forget about majoring in English, art history, political science, or women's studies, and go for computer science or almost any type of engineering - because there are lots of good jobs out there in those fields.

6ZhBuXvTtRk

[JFootin]

OK guys. I went back and copied all offending images to Photobucket and edited the posts to replace them. They all came from TaurusArmed.net Forum. I now know to copy pics from there to Photobucket before posting them. Sorry. :blushing:

[Tinman507]

Oh I see. cheatin on us. Here we are at home slaving over laundry, screaming kids and all the housework and you're off gallivanting around with other forums. I am going home to mother.

[Bawanna]

Tinman, I know this is shocking and we've put it off as long as we can BUT.......I'm your mother.:eek:

[Tinman507]

Tin....

http://bturn.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/darth-vader-face.jpeg

I am your mother

http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-cF0Rzp9LRd8/T5IYqwZWqkI/AAAAAAAADug/vsSd9bflJpg/s1600/lukeNOOOOOO.jpg

[Bawanna]

I knew it was gonna be upsetting for you. Contrary to popular belief you were not born on the starship Enterprise but you are related to Leonard Nimoy.

Might as well get it all out and in the open at once and work on moving forward.

Please don't forget me come mothers day.

[Scoundrel]

Mommy!

[Barth]

http://images1.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20120520194858/slaveleiafanfictiona/images/a/a9/73232_159625824077743_100000909792710_307752_16758 56_n.jpghttp://wheretruthlies.com/drupal/sites/default/files/images/Slave_Leia_0059.jpghttp://imgdonkey.com/big/WjIyZUE/happy-55th-birthday-princess.gif
http://images2.fanpop.com/image/photos/13700000/Leia-on-the-Beach-princess-leia-organa-solo-skywalker-13799847-378-527.jpg

[Tinman507]

It's the ears aint it? you promised to never mention the ears.

http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-WcWuKPKXsKs/TX1hFbyfYZI/AAAAAAAAHEM/YhuhaKqXYJM/s1600/big_ears.jpg

[Tinman507]

Mommy!

I need to go home. Just had an accident.

[Bawanna]

http://images1.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20120520194858/slaveleiafanfictiona/images/a/a9/73232_159625824077743_100000909792710_307752_16758 56_n.jpg

This is actually your sister, well actually your sister and your cousin. Originally he was Frank, but after the operation she's now Mindy, who later hooked up with Mork from Ork. A close knit family to be sure.

Yes son, there is an Arkansas in space too.

[MW surveyor]

^^^^Now this kind of stuff is what the Happiness thread is supposed to be about!

[mr surveyor]

made my day too:)

[QuercusMax]

Sorry about my earlier off-topic post in this thread. I always seem to be on a different page from everyone else - if I'm even reading the same book!

I get a lot of dumb looks in real life too, and not all of them are from the mirror. :yo:

And now - back to the regularly-scheduled levity.

[Scoundrel]

Off-topic? What IS the topic in this thread, anyway?

[Barth]

This is actually your sister, well actually your sister and your cousin. Originally he was Frank, but after the operation she's now Mindy, who later hooked up with Mork from Ork. A close knit family to be sure.

Yes son, there is an Arkansas in space too.

Actually my step sister.
So that's OK right?
http://www.empireonline.com/images/features/100greatestcharacters/photos/89.jpg

[Bawanna]

Absolutely a ok Barth. We don't do blood test. Drink it now and then but never test it. Incidently, the little side head mullets are to cover up her huge ears, she was quite sensitive about them. She's Tinmans grandmother. Don't look bad for 756 years old huh?

Love knows no boundaries, at least that's what I'm told. I started to make a political statement but I cut my tongue off just in time. Didn't want to ruin our happy roll here.

Quercus, this is the no ryhme or reason thread so jumping around like a frog leg in a frying pan is perfectly acceptable and encouraged.

[Scoundrel]

O Oracle most polite, who never drinks from the fingerbowl and always knows the correct fork, I have a question on modern etiquette which I thought I would refer to you. Under normal circumstances, a gentleman should stand aside and hold a door for a lady. In the case of revolving doors, however, this is clearly impractical; and further, should the gentleman not enter first, in order to provide the motive power for the revolution of the door?

The Internet Oracle has pondered your question deeply.
And in response, thus spake the Oracle:

You're right, holding a revolving door is discouraged after the first two or three times; the bleeding from the knuckles is just unseemly. However, rather than being just an etiquette dilemma,

The revolving door can be used as a subtle and polite way of evaluating a relationship.

When first approaching a revolving door as a couple, the gentleman should step aside so that the lady arrives at the door first. If she waits for him to move up and start the door moving for her, he should get used to being whipped. If she attempts to start the door herself but fails, she's out of shape and will gain 30 pounds over the next year. The best scenario is for her to successfully get through the door herself, after which he can step in behind her and check out her nicely toned, self-sufficient rear.

Assuming the lady has passed the first test, the gentleman should ensure that he goes first the next time. If the lady rushes to get in front and do it herself, she has a problem with men and the gentleman should just turn around and forget both the door and the lady. If she allows him to go first, he should keep walking all the way through the door and emerge back where they started, attempting to look like one of the old comedians from before World War II. If the lady sees no humor in this, she's a lifeless drone and should be avoided. Mild amusement is acceptable, but the lady gets bonus points if she follows him back around and laughs about it. More than once is just dumb, however.

The gentleman should be absolutely unconcerned about what happens when the couple comes across revolving doors after this point. If the lady EVER mentions her desire for him to adopt a certain revolving door behavior, she is stifling his individuality and should be given a look of disbelief.

That pretty much sums it up. I'm sure you're probably shocked, but what can I say? They don't have revolving doors on Mars.


You owe the Oracle a revolving liquor cabinet.

[Bawanna]

Dietrich lives!!!! Dietrich is alive!!!:D:D:D

[JFootin]

Oh I see. cheatin on us. Here we are at home slaving over laundry, screaming kids and all the housework and you're off gallivanting around with other forums. I am going home to mother.

My excuse is that I now own a Taurus, so I wanted to bathe in Taurus knowledge. Actually, TaurusArmed is wide open with political commentary, and there's some pretty good humor there, too. I just thought I'd share a few good things with y'all.

I am also spending some time on the Walther Forum because I have a PPQ 9mm on order. Not a very fun place and they don't allow any politics at all.

[Tinman507]

Dietrich lives!!!! Dietrich is alive!!!:D:D:D

Hold me mommy, I'm scared

[ltxi]

Hahaha....Bawanna's crazier then I am!

[mr surveyor]

I miss the Big D

[Bawanna]

Me too! Every single day.

[ltxi]

.x3

[yqtszhj]

Make it 4

[Bawanna]

I sometimes think of tinman as the spawn of Dietrich or a technologically advanced version.

Helps a lot but still a couple ingredients short of the D.

[Tinman507]

nah, no one comes close to Dietrich. Not now or ever.

[JFootin]

"Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the the universe." Albert Einstein

I understand that you can't fix stupid, but why do liberals insist on mass producing it?

We have enough gun control. What we need is idiot control.

Crowded elevators smell different to midgets.

[JFootin]

911 in the South

This is an example of why some folks don't want to live in the South. Believe it or not, these are Memphis, Tennessee's REAL 911 Calls!

Dispatcher: 9-1-1 What is your emergency?
Caller: I heard what sounded like gunshots coming from the brown house on the corner.
Dispatcher: Do you have an address?
Caller: No, I have on a blouse and slacks, why?

Dispatcher: 9-1-1 What is your emergency?
Caller: Someone broke into my house and took a bite out of my ham and cheese sandwich .
Dispatcher: Excuse me?
Caller: I made a ham and cheese sandwich and left it on the kitchen table and when I came back from the bathroom, someone had taken a bite out of it.
Dispatcher: Was anything else taken?
Caller: No, but this has happened to me before and I'm sick and tired of it!

Dispatcher: 9-1-1 What is the nature of your emergency?
Caller: I'm trying to reach nine eleven but my phone doesn't have an eleven on it.
Dispatcher: This is nine eleven.
Caller: I thought you just said it was nine-one-one
Dispatcher: Yes, ma'am nine-one-one and nine-eleven are the same thing.
Caller: Honey, I may be old, but I'm not stupid.

Dispatcher: 9-1-1 What's the nature of your emergency?
Caller: My wife is pregnant and her contractions are only two minutes apart
Dispatcher: Is this her first child?
Caller: No, you idiot! This is her husband!

And the winner is............

Dispatcher: 9-1-1
Caller: Yeah, I'm having trouble breathing. I'm all out of breath. Darn....I think I'm going to pass out.
Dispatcher: Sir, where are you calling from?
Caller: I'm at a pay phone. North and Foster.
Dispatcher: ! Sir, an ambulance is on the way. Are you an asthmatic?
Caller: No
Dispatcher: What were you doing before you started having trouble breathing?
Caller: Running from the Police.

[Tinman507]

One day in the future, Barack Obama has a heart-attack and dies.

He immediately goes to hell, (of course) where the devil is waiting for him.

"I don't know what to do here," says the devil. "You are on my list, but I have no room for you.

You definitely have to stay here, so I'll tell you what I'm going to do.
I've got a few folks here who weren't quite as bad as you.

I'll let one of them go, but you have to take their place. I'll even let YOU decide who leaves.

Obama thought that sounded pretty good, so the devil opened the door to the first room.

In it was Ted Kennedy and a large pool of water. Ted kept diving in, and surfacing, empty handed. Over, and over, he dived in and surfaced
with nothing. Such was his fate in hell.

"No," Obama said. "I don't think so. I'm not a good swimmer, and I don't think I could do that all day long.

"The devil led him to the door of the next room. In it was Al Gore with a sledge-hammer and a room full of rocks. All he did was swing that hammer,
time after time after time.

"No, this is no good; I've got this problem with my shoulder. I would be in constant agony if all I could do was break rocks all day," commented Obama.

The devil opened a third door. Through it, Obama saw Bill Clinton, lying on the bed, his arms tied over his head, and his legs restrained in a
spread-eagle pose. Bent over him was Monica Lewinsky, doing what she does best.

Obama looked at this in shock and disbelief, and finally said, "Yeah man, I can handle this.”
"The devil smiled and said...........








"OK, Monica, you're free to go."

[Bawanna]

Now Ward, don't you think you were a little hard on the Beaver last night?

hmmmmm?

[Tinman507]

190iqepL-G4

[megamanfan]

Got my CW9 today :D cant wait to get to the range Saturday :53:

[mr surveyor]

I'm thinking happy thoughts...... tomorrow morning when I wake up it will be mid November of 2016 and a 70 year old Ronald Reagan will have just been elected to his 9th term as President.... Paul Ryan will be Speaker of the House....Rubio will be Senate Majority Leader...Nancy Pelosi will be bussing tables in the Congressional Cafeteria....I'll be thirty years old enjoying semi-retirement....



I think I need another double shot of cheap tequila:(

[TucsonMTB]

Didn't you tell me your physician advised against taking those meds with an alcoholic beverage? :confused:

[mr surveyor]

Didn't you tell me your physician advised against taking those meds with an alcoholic beverage? :confused:



you may be on to something, except there are no meds.... prescription ran out two months ago...took over a week to get a script for a one month refill.... dr office said I had to schedule an office visit to get another 6 month script..... the one month supply ran out Sunday.... next available slot for appointment - March 2013.....

so, no worry about "mixing":)


Don't ya just love how our medical system has advanced in the last few short years

[mr surveyor]

I'm still gonna make up happy thoughts in my head.... stay out of my head:p

[JFootin]

OK, Monica, you're free to go.

I'm going to have to start wearing a helmet with full face shield to catch the liquid that spews from my mouth! That is funny stuff! :D

[Barth]

Sadly I've given up on drinking and have never taken meds.
Have no options but to face the day clearly.
Even at the range,
I tend to accelerate fire through a magazine to unacceptable rapid fire levels.

My new truck is nice.
And my rash of new Hecker and Koch guns have kept me relatively calm so far.

I wait and watch with apprehension as to what will unfold in the coming year....
http://us.123rf.com/400wm/400/400/72soul/72soul1207/72soul120700051/14415710-illustration-depicting-a-highway-gantry-sign-with-an-apprehension-concept-blue-sky-background.jpg

[Tinman507]

That's the part that sux more than anything....The watching & waiting. No control whatsoever. No way to steer my own destiny.

[Tinman507]

12 REASONS TO VOTE NEW DEMOCRAT

1. I voted Democrat because I love the fact that I can now marry whatever I want. I've decided to marry my German Shepherd.

2. I voted Democrat because I believe oil companies' profits of 4% on a gallon of gas are obscene but the Government taxing the same gallon of gas at 15% isn't.

3. I voted Democrat because I believe the Government will do a better job of spending the money I earn than I would.

4. I voted Democrat because Freedom of Speech is fine as long as nobody is offended by it.

5. I voted Democrat because I'm way too irresponsible to own a gun and I know that my local police are all I need to protect me from murderers and thieves.

6. I voted Democrat because I believe that people who can't tell us if it will rain on Friday can tell us that the polar ice caps will melt away in 10 years if I don't start driving a Prius.

7. I voted Democrat because I'm not concerned about millions of babies being aborted so long as we keep all death row inmates alive.

8. I voted Democrat because I think illegal aliens have a right to free health care, education and Social Security benefits, and we should take away the Social Security from those who paid into it.

9. I voted Democrat because I believe that businesses should not be allowed to make profits for themselves. They need to break even and give the rest away to the government for redistribution as the Democrats see fit.

10. I voted Democrat because I believe liberal Judges need to rewrite the Constitution every few days to suit some fringe kooks who would never get their agendas past the voters.

11. I voted Democrat because I think that it's better to pay billions for their oil to people who hate us but not drill our own because it might upset some endangered beetle, gopher or fish.

12. I voted Democrat because my head is so firmly planted up my ass, it's unlikely that I'll ever have another point of view.

No trees were harmed in the sending of this message. However, a large number of electrons were terribly inconvenienced.

[OldLincoln]

The literary forum is too far back to dig for, so....

I finished Ashes #30 last night and was very disappointed. Seems about 25% was quoted from earlier books and it didn't feel like it had any energy. I've read Johnston died of cancer and his last few books were bad so I'll stop here.

[Bawanna]

I'm about 3/4 of the way thru # 30 too. It is kind of a recap.

I have 31 thru 33, there's talk that there are a couple more. I'm gonna read em through. Kind of addicted to it.

My dealer just sent me the first 10 in the Survivalist series. I didn't realize it was so big either, thought it was 5 or 6 books but he says there are 27 in that series. It's similar in some respects, more futuristic in some areas.

I read a few like 30 years ago. I remember cyrogenic chambers and being thawed out after 5,000 years. Kind of interesting.

At least I have something to keep going on when I run out of Ben Raines.

[JFootin]

Fellow hereabouts recently boasted about his .44 Mag. AutoMag. I don't recall ever firing an AutoMag, but did get a chance to do some shooting with a .50 AE Desert Eagle. I had read articles about this gun, and like all new guns, I was curious about it.

I'm not sensitive to recoil, and have shot some very hard kicking and impressive shooting handguns, so was prepared for the buck and roar of the .50 caliber Desert Eagle.

The owner gave me a quick rundown on operation, and I picked out my target, raised the pistol, and squeezed.

The recoil was surprisingly mild, but the blast was impressive. When your pants legs sort of flap in the breeze from the concussion, you've touched off something!

[JFootin]

The literary forum is too far back to dig for, so....

Need to make it a sticky.

[wyntrout]

The literary forum is too far back to dig for, so....

I finished Ashes #30 last night and was very disappointed. Seems about 25% was quoted from earlier books and it didn't feel like it had any energy. I've read Johnston died of cancer and his last few books were bad so I'll stop here.

After about 20 books back in the 90's, I came to the same conclusion... too much repetition... cut and paste of whole chapters and very much the same plot over and over....

Wynn:)

[JFootin]

Q-Line SafeGuard Shelving System (http://www.qlinedesign.com/about.html#.UKPUXGC4LAg)

1pYqquG27pg#!

[Barth]

Fellow hereabouts recently boasted about his .44 Mag. AutoMag. I don't recall ever firing an AutoMag, but did get a chance to do some shooting with a .50 AE Desert Eagle. I had read articles about this gun, and like all new guns, I was curious about it.

I'm not sensitive to recoil, and have shot some very hard kicking and impressive shooting handguns, so was prepared for the buck and roar of the .50 caliber Desert Eagle.

The owner gave me a quick rundown on operation, and I picked out my target, raised the pistol, and squeezed.

The recoil was surprisingly mild, but the blast was impressive. When your pants legs sort of flap in the breeze from the concussion, you've touched off something!


Years ago I took a defensive handgun live fire course from Andy Standford.
Part of the training we were broke into pairs.
One of us was asked to stand next to a target while you fired into it.
The object was to experience friendly fire happening close and behind you.

My partner fired his Beretta .25 as I stood next to the target.
It was interesting.
Then we traded places and I touched off 240 gr 44 Magnum Federal Hydra-shoks from my four inch S&W Mountain Gun.

My partner said he could literally feel the shock waves coming off the supersonic magnum rounds as they flew by.

[jocko]

yes and probably u could have reached up and caught that little pissy 25 and returned it to him to use again. Just sayin. The only shock from a 25 that ur gonna get is when the BG shoves it up ur ass. Just sayin..

[jocko]

Q-Line SafeGuard Shelving System (http://www.qlinedesign.com/about.html#.UKPUXGC4LAg)

1pYqquG27pg#!

but certainly not cheap. I think I could buy a bank vault for far less

[Armybrat]

yes and probably u could have reached up and caught that little pissy 25 and returned it to him to use again. Just sayin. The only shock from a 25 that ur gonna get is when the BG shoves it up ur ass. Just sayin..

Don't sell those little bitty things short.

About 25 years ago my late MIL chased off a midnight intruder with a POS Titan .25 one night. Luckily she didn't have to fire it.

My son uses it for a paperweight nowadays.

[JFootin]

http://i1230.photobucket.com/albums/ee486/John_England/Misc/x5Eg9.jpg

[Tinman507]

Years ago I took a defensive handgun live fire course from Andy Standford.
Part of the training we were broke into pairs.
One of us was asked to stand next to a target while you fired into it.
The object was to experience friendly fire happening close and behind you.

My partner fired his Beretta .25 as I stood next to the target.
It was interesting.
Then we traded places and I touched off 240 gr 44 Magnum Federal Hydra-shoks from my four inch S&W Mountain Gun.

My partner said he could literally feel the shock waves coming off the supersonic magnum rounds as they flew by.

Did you have to go home and change your shorts? I know I would.

[OldLincoln]

http://i1230.photobucket.com/albums/ee486/John_England/Misc/x5Eg9.jpg
Let me guess, a swim suit?

[jocko]

Don't sell those little bitty things short.

About 25 years ago my late MIL chased off a midnight intruder with a POS Titan .25 one night. Luckily she didn't have to fire it.

My son uses it for a paperweight nowadays.

with that titan 25, two things would have happened.

#1, IT WOULD NOT HAD WENT BANG EITHER
#2 BG would have stopped and taken it away and did the shove thing. Just sayin

Sure it has saved some people in the past, but it isin the past too. today would be so so so dumb to carry a 25 when about every 380 is the same size or cloase enought onot matter but power wise a big upgrade. Just sayin

[JFootin]

Let me guess, a swim suit?

I dunno. Just a funny pic. But you know there are people out there for whom that extra instruction would be useful! :ohmy:

[Barth]

Did you have to go home and change your shorts? I know I would.

We were not told what was going to happen till the shooting started.
Everybody knew each other and we we all fine with it.
This was the second day of the live fire class.
The instructor said he doesn't always do that.
But we had all demonstrated to him that we could shoot well enough for the exercise.
It was a class of various degree martial arts black belts.

When I tell others of the drill,
folks often say they would not have participated.

None of us hesitated to participate...

[Scoundrel]

We were not told what was going to happen till the shooting started.
Everybody knew each other and we we all fine with it.
This was the second day of the live fire class.
The instructor said he doesn't always do that.
But we had all demonstrated to him that we could shoot well enough for the exercise.
It was a class of various degree martial arts black belts.

When I tell others of the drill,
folks often say they would not have participated.

None of us hesitated to participate...

I would trust one of my friends to be my partner in that drill.
There's another friend that I would NOT trust in that situation - he shoots like Jocko.

[MikeyKahr]

I would not have trusted the older gentleman in my CHL class either. He couldn't keep it on the paper.

[Bawanna]

I kind of like living (or not) right on the edge. I'd partner up with ole Jocko anytime.

[JFootin]

While the C-5 was turning over its engines, a female crewman gave the G.I.s on board the usual information regarding seat belts, emergency exits, etc.
Finally, she said, 'Now sit back and enjoy your trip while your captain, Judith Campbell, and crew take you safely to Afghanistan '

An old Master Sergeant sitting in the eighth row thought to himself, 'Did I hear her right? Is the captain a woman? '

When the attendant came by he said 'Did I understand you right? Is the captain a woman?' 'Yes,'! said the attendant, 'In fact, this entire crew is female.'

'My God,' he said, 'I wish I had two double scotch and sodas. I don't know what to think with only women up there in the cockpit.'

'That's another thing, Sergeant,' said the crew member, 'We No Longer Call It The Cockpit' .

'It's The Box Office.'

[Tinman507]

I kind of like living (or not) right on the edge. I'd partner up with ole Jocko anytime.

simple to team with Jocko. Stand in front of the Bull. Perfectly safe there.

[Armybrat]

with that titan 25, two things would have happened.

#1, IT WOULD NOT HAD WENT BANG EITHER
#2 BG would have stopped and taken it away and did the shove thing. Just sayin

Sure it has saved some people in the past, but it isin the past too. today would be so so so dumb to carry a 25 when about every 380 is the same size or cloase enought onot matter but power wise a big upgrade. Just sayin

I know that - she just lucked out that the perp didn't test her. I didn't even know she had that POS - damn thing horrified me just to look at it. But it scared that one bg off, thank gawd.

I took it away from her and gave her a S&W Chief's Special.
with some .38 Sp JHP ammo. So now has that gun too.

[Bawanna]

This of course isn't one of the effected threads but I'd like to propose that from here on out we avoid injecting politics into threads that aren't already politically motivated.
It's very difficult to not do so and I'm certainly as guilty as the next guy but it's my job since I'm the fall guy. When anything goes wrong anywhere it's my fault.

I predict that we are not far from going back to the letter of the rules and getting entirely away from the political post unless they are gun or 2nd amendment related or about lieing fork tongued bleeding heart liberal scum sucking instigators of anti gun sentiment who's parents should have practiced safe fooling around or should have believed in abortion.

OK? Are you with me. Can I get a heck yeah?

[Tinman507]

Aye Aye Sir!

[Barth]

Lt. Comd. Bawanna:
All right, ladies and gentlemen.
We have fulfilled every requirement of this mission except one: Norfolk.
Presently, there are several ships positioned outside the harbor to intercept us.
To get in, we're gonna have to use a tactic that is somewhat bizarre,
and extremely risky.
If any of you feel it's not worth it, please let me know now.

Seaman Barth 'H&K' Sylvesterson:
Uh, actually, sir, I think we prefer to go with the bizarre and risky.
Worked for us so far.

[jocko]

I kind of like living (or not) right on the edge. I'd partner up with ole Jocko anytime.

I would partner up with you great one and let u use ur trusty 1911, that way, in case ur shot was way off target, I would have plenty of time to just get away from the oncoming slow ass bullet. Just sayin:third:

[jocko]

This of course isn't one of the effected threads but I'd like to propose that from here on out we avoid injecting politics into threads that aren't already politically motivated.
It's very difficult to not do so and I'm certainly as guilty as the next guy but it's my job since I'm the fall guy. When anything goes wrong anywhere it's my fault.

I predict that we are not far from going back to the letter of the rules and getting entirely away from the political post unless they are gun or 2nd amendment related or about lieing fork tongued bleeding heart liberal scum sucking instigators of anti gun sentiment who's parents should have practiced safe fooling around or should have believed in abortion.

OK? Are you with me. Can I get a heck yeah?

I did not know we were even discussing politics. humm sumpin learnedhere ever day:third:

I loved it though when the great one called out John McCain yesterday, now a prisonor of war and a true American hero, being challenged by a fokking twit. Well I just don't think so guys. Course what color is Susan Rice?

So go figure:eek:

[Bawanna]

A great day for bawanna. I just got my third written verbal warning, I still can't manage to get what I call a black letter that stays in your file for a year and is supposedly serious business. Everyone else has had several but I can't even get one.

I got it for not being PC as usual and having fun, just criminal. I had to reissue a photo ticket to my son since the car was in my wifes name. Goofing around I put his first name, then who's your daddy for a middle and then his last name. Ole serious business didn't like it.

I now have 3 hanging on my cubicle walls, 2 in one year. I'm so proud.

I asked if I was on admin leave with pay and she said I already was admin. So I asked what the heck do we do to punish office pukes.

Kind of sad, when an officer does something wrong his punishment is to do what I do, with his usual pay of course. Makes me so damn proud.

Can't even screw up correctly, I want a black letter.

[Scoundrel]

Here ya go:
http://www.kandyskorner.com/images/Pirates/TheBlackSpot.gif

[JFootin]

Sounds like a woman drunk with power, Bawanna. Cudos on the 3 reprimands!

This is so cute, I had to share it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch_popup?v=EVwlMVYqMu4&vq=medium#t=125

[JFootin]

http://i1230.photobucket.com/albums/ee486/John_England/Misc/40780d1353035880-post-your-funny-pi.jpg

[JFootin]

Very interesting....

Heritage Firearms 45/410 Big Bore Home Defender (http://www.kygunco.com/heritage-rough-rider-45-colt-410-ga-467-bbl-49183)

ePcM5nnES9s#!

Ugly gun, but I like the grip and the price.

[Scoundrel]

Don't like the style, don't like the single action only, don't like having to remove the cylinder to reload. Good price though!

[mr surveyor]

uuuuhhhh.... you don't have to remove the cylinder to reload, and a whole lot of folks love their SA revolvers (I'm not one though).

The real downer to me is putting some kind of safety on a revolver... especially, of all things a singal action revolver..... WTH?

[jocko]

I just cannot cuddle up to that gun in anyway shape or forum, other than IMO butt ugly,not sure If I wanted a hoe defense gun it would be a single action of anything...

[JFootin]

uuuuhhhh.... you don't have to remove the cylinder to reload, and a whole lot of folks love their SA revolvers (I'm not one though).

The real downer to me is putting some kind of safety on a revolver... especially, of all things a singal action revolver..... WTH?

It's because, even with the hammer not cocked, it could go bang if dropped. It is like old fashioned SA revolvers and doesn't have a transfer bar. The hammer sits against the primer.

Ehh, too many negatives with this gun.

[Scoundrel]

uuuuhhhh.... you don't have to remove the cylinder to reload, and a whole lot of folks love their SA revolvers (I'm not one though).

The real downer to me is putting some kind of safety on a revolver... especially, of all things a singal action revolver..... WTH?

Sorry, guess I was not paying that close attention. Now I see the little hinged door.

[Bawanna]

I don't care for that one at all but conventional single actions are some of my favorites. I seldom double action any revolver that has a hammer. I'll ear it back every time.

The old SAA and Rugers, Uberti's and such it's a really natural move. The Redhawks and large frame Smiths not so much. They of course are better suited to double action.

I don't shoot em near as much anymore, need to break em out some.

[JFootin]

I don't care for that one at all but conventional single actions are some of my favorites. I seldom double action any revolver that has a hammer. I'll ear it back every time.

Without a radical trigger job like I got on my J-frame, I have to do this because my partially paralyzed trigger finger cannot pull it DA. So a single action "Judge" would suit me just fine. Does anyone else make one?

[jeepster09]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1geyoxeifk0&feature=relmfu

[jeepster09]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_cpD73365Y8&feature=relmfu

[LorenzoB]

I just cannot cuddle up to that gun in anyway shape or forum, other than IMO butt ugly,not sure If I wanted a hoe defense gun it would be a single action of anything...

I figured you'd be need'n to defend against hoes. Just say'n :D

[mr surveyor]

I have several sa/da revolvers... I like "options". My .44 mag Super RedHawk is quickly becomming a favorite shooter. I like the sa for "precise" shots, but also appreciate the da for the option of those emergency follow up shots. The sa/da "carry guns" are all expected to perform their assigned duties in either da or sa. But for splitting hairs, the option of sa is necessary.

Am I rambling??? It's been a long nasty week...or two:(

[MW surveyor]

Am I rambling??? :(

No more than most of the people here. :D

FWIW - I too like the options on a SA/DA type. And I like my little Single Six SA. Slows me down to enjoy the shoot six times, reload slowly and think about how I shot the last six.

[JFootin]

Kim Kardashian plying her stock in trade (https://www.nydailynews.com/entertainment/gossip/kim-kardashian-dazzles-marine-corps-ball-article-1.1203109).

http://assets.nydailynews.com/polopoly_fs/1.1203123.1353076061!/img/httpImage/image.jpg_gen/derivatives/landscape_635/article-kimk-military02.jpg (https://www.nydailynews.com/entertainment/gossip/kim-kardashian-dazzles-marine-corps-ball-article-1.1203109)

[jocko]

Kim Kardashian plying her stock in trade (https://www.nydailynews.com/entertainment/gossip/kim-kardashian-dazzles-marine-corps-ball-article-1.1203109).

http://assets.nydailynews.com/polopoly_fs/1.1203123.1353076061!/img/httpImage/image.jpg_gen/derivatives/landscape_635/article-kimk-military02.jpg (https://www.nydailynews.com/entertainment/gossip/kim-kardashian-dazzles-marine-corps-ball-article-1.1203109)

its evidkent he is looking ather nice shoes. Geesch anyone can see that:blah: Just sayin

[Bawanna]

I think he's just in a trance pondering how something can be so nice from the waist up and still have such a big arse.

[jocko]

I think he's just in a trance pondering how something can be so nice from the waist up and still have such a big arse.

really need help great one. Just sayin

[OldLincoln]

Not a Happy Thought....

Do you know that today is "Prematurity Day"? Yes a day to focus on preemies. We just finished Breast Cancer Month. So when is Prostate Cancer Day or Month? More men get prostate cancer than women get breast cancer but do you hear about it? No! Why don't you hear about it? Because the facts proven by doctors are that having sex at least 4 times a week will prevent most cases of prostate cancer - that's why! America is clearly a matriarchal society headed up by Nancy Pelosi who wants all conservative males to die! Well either her or Opra, I'm not too sure witch (oops I meant which).

PS: No I don't have Prostate Cancer and I'm seriously sorry if this offended those who do.

[jocko]

I HAD porostate cancer and trust me I screwed my brains out in my earlier years and at age 53 was diagnosed with prostate cancer. My two uncles had it My dad had it, my olde rbrother had it. I certainly think they screwed their brains out to, . It is more heriditary than anything else.

Now personally I see nuttin wrong with screwin ones brains out either. I did read where it could be good for your heart, but the doctor that told me that died at an early age to. I think he was gay though, so maybe there is a moral to this story. Just sayin:eek:

Course there has never been a documented case of a sheep herder ever coming down with Prostate cancer, so again there is a moral to this story to. Butt I won't go there Just sayin

[JFootin]

ALERTS TO THREATS IN EUROPE-By John Cleese (British writer, Actor, and Tall Person)

The English are feeling the pinch in relation to recent events in Syria and have therefore raised their security level from "miffed" to "Peeved". Soon, security levels may be raised to "Irritated" or even "A Bit Cross". The English haven't been "A Bit Cross" since The Blitz in 1940 when tea supplies nearly ran out. Terrorists have been re-categorized from "Tiresome" to "A Bloody Nuisance". The last time the British issued a "Bloody Nuisance" warning level was in 1588 when threatened by the Spanish Armada.

The Scots have raised their threat level from "Pissed Off" to "Lets get the Bastards". They don't have any other levels. This is the reason they have been used on the front line of the British Army for the last 300 years.

The French government announced yesterday that it has raised it's alert level from "Run" to "Hide". The only two higher levels in France are "Collaborate" and "Surrender". The rise was precipitated by a recent fire that destroyed the French White Flag factory, effectively paralyzing the country's military capacity.

Italy has increased the alert level from "Shout Loudly and Excitedly" to "Elaborate Military Posturing". Two more levels remain : "Ineffective Combat Operations", and "Change Sides".

The Germans have increased their alert status from "Disdainful Arrogance" to "Dress in Uniform and Sing Marching Songs". They also have two higher levels, "Invade a Neighbour", and "Lose".

The Belgians on the other hand, are all on holiday as usual; the only threat they are worried about is NATO pulling out of Brussels.

The Spanish are all excited to see their new submarines ready to deploy. These beautifully designed subs have glass bottoms so the new Spanish Navy can get a really good look at the old Spanish Navy.

Australia meanwhile, has raised its security level from "No Worries" to "She'll be Alright, Mate". Two more escalation levels remain. "Crikey!! I Think We Need To Cancel The Barbie This Weekend", and "The Barbie Is Cancelled". So far no situation has ever warranted the use of the final

[wyntrout]

Whereas... as in Rome did nearly two millennia ago... history... pesky stuff... the "Citizens" of the USA... after four years of high unemployment, economy-crushing regulations on abundant sources of energy, encouraged and rampant food stamp and welfare increases, job-killing threats to tax and further OVER-regulate businesses, and all of the, as yet, still unread regulations and laws hidden in the Obamacare bill that no one read, and the Obama administration trying to bring our nation under UN rule... gave Emperor OBAMA(Nero) FOUR MORE YEARS to fiddle over the destruction of our economy and status/power in the world as he weakens our military might and "invites" attack from without and within the country.

Yes, the CITIZENS voted for four more years of "Bread and circuses," though the national debt now exceeds the Gross National Product... which should decline further under the torrent of new EPA and other regulations that were held back until after the election.

Wynn:rolleyes:

[OldLincoln]

John, that's good....really good!

[Barth]

Just got back from the range squeezing off a quick 100 with the HK45C.
Close range rapid fire with a flash sight picture off the front sight.
I freaking love this gun.
https://www.t-mobilepictures.com/myalbum/thumbnail/photo61/9e/3c/2caeb26a157b__1353255889000.jpg?tw=0&th=720&s=true&rs=false

[wyntrout]

Is that dirt showing through the hole... and did you straddle the target laying on the ground??!

Wynn:D

[Barth]

Is that dirt showing through the hole... and did you straddle the target laying on the ground??!

Wynn:D

Target is on my brown throw rug and yes...

[wyntrout]

I tried out the ported barrel on my P9 and it seems to hold down the barrel more and give quicker follow-up shots, not that I can do any better than keep them on a sheet of paper at 7 yards with rapid fire! <Most of the time, anyhow!:rolleyes:> My first magazine of 7 was impressive to me... then it got worse, not better! It was a good purchase... on sale for $129.99... $30 less than usual??

Wynn:D

[Barth]

I tried out the ported barrel on my P9 and it seems to hold down the barrel more and give quicker follow-up shots, not that I can do any better than keep them on a sheet of paper at 7 yards with rapid fire! <Most of the time, anyhow!:rolleyes:> My first magazine of 7 was impressive to me... then it got worse, not better! It was a good purchase... on sale for $129.99... $30 less than usual??

Wynn:D

Sounds like a great price on a ported barrel.
I paid $200+ for a ported barrels on my Glock G27 and Sig P220.
$260 for a Bar Sto extended triple ported barrel for my Sig P239!
Just spent $169 on OEM H&K P2000 40 barrels (I bought two - LOL!)
Stop laughing - I have two P2000 357 guns.

Did pay $129 for a Storm Lake G27 40-9mm.
That's what lives in that gun these days.

Cheapest barrel I've bought?
Sig P220 Sport barrel $113.25
A match grade heavy contoured barrel
http://www.gunpartscorp.com/Products/1288890.htm
Barrel, .45 ACP, 139mm (5.4725"), Stainless, Factory Original, New
http://www.gunpartscorp.com/pub/ProductImage/1288890.jpg

She looks good and shoots better............................................ ......Winchester Ranger T-Series 230 gr JHP
https://www.t-mobilepictures.com/myalbum/thumbnail/photo09/fd/dd/7da54042b7a2__1327194679000.jpg?tw=0&th=720&s=true&rs=falsehttps://www.t-mobilepictures.com/myalbum/thumbnail/photo36/63/fd/e57d50c109a3__1329951359000.jpg?tw=0&th=720&s=true&rs=false

[JFootin]

http://i1230.photobucket.com/albums/ee486/John_England/Misc/41005d1353307250-post-your-funny-pi.jpg

[OldLincoln]

As I understand it germs have VERY short legs and can't get there for 5 seconds. Those unfortunates that were under the piece were crushed and never had a chance.

[O'Dell]

Just got back from the range squeezing off a quick 100 with the HK45C.
Close range rapid fire with a flash sight picture off the front sight.
I freaking love this gun.
https://www.t-mobilepictures.com/myalbum/thumbnail/photo61/9e/3c/2caeb26a157b__1353255889000.jpg?tw=0&th=720&s=true&rs=false

Am I mistaken or did you say a year or so ago that You couldn't get into HK's? Anyway, good shooting and I'm glad you came around. I like my HK45C too and if I knew I was going be in a gunfight, it's the pistol I would carry.

[GROTMAN]

I want one !! :D

http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t219/Cybenator/Misc/remoctrl-1.jpg

[Barth]

I want one !! :D

http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t219/Cybenator/Misc/remoctrl-1.jpg

I do NOT want to see Jocko's version of that thing...

[Barth]

Am I mistaken or did you say a year or so ago that You couldn't get into HK's? Anyway, good shooting and I'm glad you came around. I like my HK45C too and if I knew I was going be in a gunfight, it's the pistol I would carry.
Yup, Yup,
I used to have real problems shooting Beretta and H&K guns.
Years ago I bought a HK USP 45 SS Compact and couldn't hit the broad side of a barn.
Dumped it as fast as I could.
A funny thing happened at about 10,000/20,000 rounds.
I got better.

[yqtszhj]

I do NOT want to see Jocko's version of that thing...

Tinman will post it before long, just wait and see.

[JFootin]

Tinman will post it before long, just wait and see.

It ought to be interesting! :rolleyes:

[Tinman507]

http://www.smarthome.com/images/8158side.jpg

[Tinman507]

http://www.geogum.com/media/uploaded/posts/b3cecbede2e7d22bfd4bbeceace42500.jpg

[Tinman507]

http://funnydoom.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/remote-control-funny-motivational-poster.jpg

[Barth]

http://funnydoom.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/remote-control-funny-motivational-poster.jpg

I used to have two of those.
They are VERY EXPENSIVE and hard to keep track of.
The real definition of High Maintenance.
Finally had to give up on that addiction.

[Tinman507]

I would never own one again.
I'm thinkin lease. After 3 years and/or 45k miles, you dump it for the latest model with all the goodies and that new uh smell. Payments are damned near the same.

[Barth]

I would never own one again.
I'm thinkin lease. After 3 years and/or 45k miles, you dump it for the latest model with all the goodies and that new uh smell. Payments are damned near the same.

Yup, Yup,
Rent with no option to buy.

The balloon payment at the end is life threatening...

[Tinman507]

Ah, you gonna take me home tonight
Ah, down beside that red firelight
Are you gonna let it all hang out
Fat bottomed girls, you make the rockin' world go round

https://sphotos-b.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash3/622219_502590126440218_574177361_o.jpg

[Barth]

"Don't Go Away Mad (Just Go Away)"
http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-bd7bRkdTwss/TYA20lEuBJI/AAAAAAAAAJY/TkRY5e6PfHs/s320/walking_away.jpg

[LorenzoB]

Tinman comes through for our entertainment again.

-- First remote makes you want to go ride'n instead of watching TV.

-- Nice trigger job on that second remote! Remember always keep your finger off the trigger (unless you're watching the election results).

-- Third remote... same as first.

[Barth]

At least one, and possibly two, new 40 cal H&K barrel(s) have arrived for me at the UPS store!!!

I've got 200 Winchester Ranger T-Series 165 gr JHP arriving Monday!

Been thinking about getting a H&K P2000SK LEM.
And am not sure what caliber to get.
Would really like one in 357 Sig.
But those are like unicorns these days.
Even just the P2000SK 357 barrels are nowhere to be found.
Looks like 9mm and 40 S&W are the only options.

My P2000 357 guns, with their new 40 S&W barrels, should make that choice an easy one.

I just love getting new barrels for my guns.
I think 200 Federal HST 230 gr .45 +P rounds may be there too???
It's like XMas in November.

[Tinman507]

Barth,

Has anyone ever confused you with Amelda Marcos?
http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2010/04/03/article-1263150-08FB645D000005DC-940_468x286.jpg

[MikeyKahr]

#raises hand#

[Barth]

Barth,

Has anyone ever confused you with Amelda Marcos?
http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2010/04/03/article-1263150-08FB645D000005DC-940_468x286.jpg

I don't know what you're talking about???
https://www.t-mobilepictures.com/myalbum/thumbnail/photo08/04/14/050ebe4880ec__1336927812000.jpg?tw=0&th=720&s=true&rs=falsehttps://www.t-mobilepictures.com/myalbum/thumbnail/photo19/56/1d/8af04c72d96d__1335910560000.jpeg?tw=0&th=720&s=true&rs=falsehttps://www.t-mobilepictures.com/myalbum/thumbnail/photo24/9c/a3/d6b7ceb015e5__1336847656000.jpg?tw=0&th=720&s=true&rs=falsehttps://www.t-mobilepictures.com/myalbum/thumbnail/photo49/15/08/c5b6c54c5bbe__1350507239000.jpeg?tw=0&th=720&s=true&rs=false

[GROTMAN]

FAT BOTTOM GURLS
http://www.chiligrower.com/media/kunena/attachments/62/HotAirBalloon.jpg (http://www.chiligrower.com/media/kunena/attachments/62/HotAirBalloon.jpg)

[jeepster09]

A modern day cowboy has spent many days crossing the Dakota prairies without water.



His horse had already died of thirst. He's crawling along the dusty ground, certain that he has breathed his last breath, when all of a sudden he sees an object sticking out of the ground several yards ahead of him.



He crawls to the object, pulls it out of the ground and discovers what looks to be an old briefcase.



He opens it and out pops a genie. But this is no ordinary genie.



She is wearing an Internal Revenue Service ID badge and a dull grey dress .



There's a calculator in her pocketbook She has a pencil tucked behind one ear. 'Well, cowboy,' says the genie,

'You know how I work....You have three wishes.'



'I'm not falling for this,' said the cowboy,

'I'm not going to trust an IRS genie.'



'What do you have to lose? You've got no transportation, and it looks like you're a goner anyway!'




The cowboy thinks about this for a minute and decides that the genie is right.




'OK! I wish I were along-side a lush spring with plenty of food and drink.'



***POOF***



The cowboy finds himself beside the most beautiful spring he has ever seen, and he's surrounded with jugs of wine and platters of delicacies.



'OK, cowpoke, what's your second wish.'



'My second wish is that I was rich ....



beyond my wildest dreams.'



** *POOF***



The cowboy finds himself surrounded by treasure chests filled with rare gold coins and precious gems.



'OK, cowpuncher, you have just one more wish.



Better make it a good one!'



After thinking for a few minutes, the cowboy says,



'I wish that no matter where I go, beautiful women will want and need me.'



***POOF***



He was turned into a tampon.



Moral of the story:

If the U.S. gov ernment offers to help you,

there's going to be a string attached.










=