February's Fabulous and Festive Frivolities.

[Barth]

u guys are so kind to an ol man, I would like to \verbally thank you all but as u know this forum has some rules.

But tahnk you anyhow.

I do like the two guys in the farm lot and I am not impressed with the two hogs o the John Deer 3 wheeler. Just sayin.For a minute there I thought it looked like CJB, but I know he only goes i for thin chicks. He rides a HOG but he doesn't need to be seen with a hog. Just sayin.

Maybe sme day I can do u guys a jocko favor. Right now I am being inspected by the FDA over the possability of maybe "wasI" selling horse meat over seas for bologna and Italian salami.. I am gonna take the lance armstrong approach, I SWEAR I DID NOT DO THAT.

When you cut off and use a horses head.
You've got to do something with the rest of the horse.
And somebody seems to do a lot of horse decapitations...

Jocko art from the third grade
http://drawception.com/pub/panels/2012/3-31/Bh4HTqYDkf-8.png

[wyntrout]

I got good deals on my new Gen 3 Glocks. I wouldn't pay scalper prices for anything. I stocked up and can wait for "normal" prices! I am keeping an eye out for 9mm FMJ under $11 a box of 50 delivered... or something not too bad at Wally World... for normal range use. I have plenty of SD ammo... loaded up on that... and magazines.

Wynn:)

[Barth]

I got good deals on my new Gen 3 Glocks. I wouldn't pay scalper prices for anything. I stocked up and can wait for "normal" prices! I am keeping an eye out for 9mm FMJ under $11 a box of 50 delivered... or something not too bad at Wally World... for normal range use. I have plenty of SD ammo... loaded up on that... and magazines.

Wynn:)

There's a new range in town that lets me shoot my 5.56 pistol on the pistol range.
You know I like room clearing distances for shooting.
And they have .223 PMC range ammo ($11 - 1 box of 20 rounds).
You can only get four boxes at at time and have to shoot it all.
But that still seems like a deal to me.

This AK is so simple to strip and clean.
So damn reliable too.

I've always shot with one eye open.
Thinking I might try both eyes open and see how that works.
I really love the front sight on this bad boy.
http://cdn2.armslist.com/sites/armslist/uploads/posts/2012/06/08/426141_02_arsenal_slr_106u_krink_5_56_22_640.jpg

[GROTMAN]

As always I'm late for the party but Jocko if you want to be more environmental friendly you can switch to a Kawasaki
http://i254.photobucket.com/albums/hh81/harley451/HillbillyMotorcycle.jpg (http://feed254.photobucket.com/albums/hh81/harley451/account.rss)

[wyntrout]

Well, I'm sitting here waiting to see that purty li'l gal lead the pack at Daytona. 20:1 odds against her winning, but she has earned the best starting position and everyone else will be chasing her!

Go Danica!

Wynn:D

[jocko]

When you cut off and use a horses head.
You've got to do something with the rest of the horse.
And somebody seems to do a lot of horse decapitations...

Jocko art from the third grade
http://drawception.com/pub/panels/2012/3-31/Bh4HTqYDkf-8.png

believe my wife sent u that picture:Amflag2:

actually horse and sausage and some specialingrediats make damn good Italian salamo. If u have ever been to ol jocko's home front, u have eaten horse. Pinto's seem to make the best salami though. Just sayin

[Tinman507]

http://www.eyallalo.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/01/ford-mustang-pinto-02.jpg

[wyntrout]

Danica's leading the pack! Starting shortly!
Wynn:D

[Bawanna]

http://www.eyallalo.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/01/ford-mustang-pinto-02.jpg

Haven't see one of those in years. A trip down memory lane.

I'm back from the door of death. Man I got hit with the flu Tuesday night, worse case I think I've ever had. Don't recall having the flu in 18 years of chair life but damn I made up for it this week. So bad I couldn't motivate myself to check in. I did not throw up a little bit in my mouth! I had no idea it was possible to throw up that much for so long.

Feels like Jocko went at me with a baseball bat. Even a cough now is excruciating. But once again I looked the devil square in the eye and like a true half man begged him to let me live. (you thought I was gonna tell him to F off didn't ya. Too weak to talk tough.

[Tinman507]

Glad you're on the mend Sir. I got the flu shot and so far have managed to dodge that bullet.

[Scoundrel]

Ugh. I was there a month or so ago, wouldn't wish it on anyone. Here's hoping for a quick recovery.

[wyntrout]

We got flu shots before our holiday travels and lots of exposure to sickies... but Wifey is hauling client-patients around ... case manager... and getting more EXPOSURE!

Well, good... Gordon got rid of the food wrapper debris while behind the pace car... he was going to be toast, otherwise!

Litter sucks!!

Wynn:D

[GROTMAN]

Bawanna..guess that explains why haven't seen many posts by you lately. Thought you went on another fishing trip. :) It hit me about 3:00 am Weds night..woke up with that weird feeling and ended up spending the next several hours hugging the wastebasket. Couldn't even manage to kneel at the commode. Had a major headache, off/on fever and couldn't even sit up for most of the day. The next day all that was over but felt pretty weak. Today is the first day I actually feel pretty normal. I did have the flu shot so don't know if it was the flu or some other kind of bug but was not fun. Glad to hear your are feeling better. P.S. I bought a new wastebasket yesterday!!

[OldLincoln]

One with a fresh minty odor?

[GROTMAN]

One with a fresh minty odor?

Not yet..but was thinking of getting some Frog lube since I've been reading about it so much here lately..maybe I'll get some and coat it with that :)

[MW surveyor]

Good to read that you are getting better.

Came down with something on Tuesday and it's a good thing that things were a bit slow at work. Must have slept about 18 hours per day until yesterday. Still not 100%.

I've used Frog lube before but the frogs didn't like it so much ;)

(You can read that any way you want!)

[Tinman507]

pVcbasIb8lQ

[wyntrout]

http://www.kahrtalk.com/picture.php?albumid=32&pictureid=311

Do you use your hand or some kind of frog press??



Wynn:D

[MW surveyor]

http://www.kahrtalk.com/picture.php?albumid=32&pictureid=311

Do you use your hand or some kind of frog press??



Wynn:D

Used to use my hand but switched to a potato masher as they pizzed too much on my hand.:D

[JFootin]

Glad you made it through, Bawanna, and the rest of you, too! :)

[jeepster09]

Hmmm....:amflag:

[DeaconKC]

Old man goes into the barber shop and tells the barber he needs a haircut and a shave. Try to get it close, been a spell since have had a good shave with all these dang wrinkles.

Barber says, well have a seat, I can help you out there.

So the old fellow sets down and the barber reaches up on the shelf and gets a cup with a wooden ball in it.

Tells the old fellow to put it inside his left cheek and then shaves that side and tells him to move it to the other side.

Afterwards, the old timer says, dang ! best shave in years, but barber, what if I had got excited and swallowed that wooden ball?

No problem, just bring it back in a couple of days like everyone else does!

[JFootin]

:puke:

[Tilos]

I don't care who you are this is just cool

http://www.varietyvideosllc.com/about2.html

That geezer has talent:faint2:

[Bawanna]

Isn't that the sweetest thing? Talented and patient guy that one.

[JFootin]

Incredible!

[Scoundrel]

In 1986, Peter Davies was on holiday in Kenya after graduating from Louisiana State University .

On a hike through the bush, he came across a young bull elephant standing with one leg raised in the air. The elephant seemed distressed, so Peter approached it very carefully. He got down on one knee, inspected the elephants foot, and found a large piece of wood deeply embedded in it. As carefully and as gently as he could, Peter worked the wood out with his knife, after which the elephant gingerly put down its foot.

The elephant turned to face the man and with a rather curious look on its face, stared at him for several tense moments. Peter stood frozen, thinking of nothing else but being trampled. Eventually the elephant trumpeted loudly, turned and walked away. Peter never forgot that elephant or the events of that day.

Twenty years later, Peter was walking through the Chicago Zoo with his teenaged son. As they approached the elephant enclosure, one of the creatures turned and walked over to near where Peter and his son Cameron were standing. The large bull elephant stared at Peter, lifted its front foot off the ground, then put it down. The elephant did that several times then trumpeted loudly, all the while staring at the man.

Remembering the encounter in 1986, Peter could not help wondering if this was the same elephant. Peter summoned up his courage, climbed over the railing and made his way into the enclosure. He walked right up to the elephant and stared back in wonder. The elephant trumpeted again, wrapped its trunk around one of Peter legs and slammed him against the railing, killing him instantly.

Probably wasn't the same damned elephant.

This is for everyone who sends me those heart-warming bullshit stories.

[wyntrout]

That's a good one, Scoundrel! My first real laugh of the day!

Wynn:D

[Scoundrel]

That's a good one, Scoundrel! My first real laugh of the day!

Wynn:D

Compliments of my sister, via Facebook. :)

[wyntrout]

We watched last week's Preppers last night... what a hoot! There was one of those wacko tree-hugging types with his greatest fear being a Tsunami... so he moved to Hawaii... where perhaps the threat is greater.

He's into communing with Nature and praying to God(?) for guidance on when to head for higher territory and for protection when it comes to partaking of local water sources and plants! He begins lightly clothed... no shoes(?) and with a tiny backpack...not filled with food, or water/containers, or filters, or maybe warmer protective clothing. He actually found a woman to accompany him, but she declined to drink his urine when they immediately ran out of water during their trek!

A bald eagle just flew by! Love my view!

Anyhow, this was the flakiest "prepper"... if, indeed, you could call him that... more of an un-prepper! You can't just pray for water or unknown plants' fruit not to make sick or kill you... with toxins or parasites!! There are some really nasty things you can get from unfiltered or untreated water... and food!

Wynn:)

[getsome]

Scoundrel's elephant story reminds me of that guy Timothy Treadwell and his girlfriend who made a documentary about Grizzly Bears and they spent a good deal of time studying their habits until they finally thought they had made a breakthrough with this one Grizzly who didn't seem to mind their presence so they got even closer to him and Treadwell thought the bear had accepted them up until the point the Grizzly ate them both for lunch....True Story....Stupid is as stupid does

[GROTMAN]

http://i850.photobucket.com/albums/ab68/ncfubar/USS_Clinton_zps888af0e4.jpg


The USS William Jefferson Clinton - CVS1


The USS William Jefferson Clinton (CVS1) set sail today from its home port of Vancouver, BC. The ship is the first of its kind in the Navy and is a standing legacy to President Bill Clinton "for his foresight in military budget cuts" and his conduct while president. The ship, constructed nearly entirely from recycled aluminum, is solar powered with a top speed of 5 knots. It boasts an arsenal that is comprised of either a single F-14 Tomcat or a single F-18 Hornet aircraft, both of which are completely unarmed. Although they cannot be launched or captured on the 100 foot flight deck, they do present a very menacing presence. The AV-8B Harrier will never be based on this ship as it could endanger the lives of terrorists and other enemies that seek the destruction of America.

As a standing order there are no firearms allowed on board. The 20 person crew is completely diversified and includes members of all races, creeds, sex, and sexual orientation. This crew, like the crew aboard the USS Jimmy Carter, is specially trained to avoid conflicts and appease any and all enemies of the United States at all costs.

An on board Type One! DNC Universal Translator can send out messages of apology in any language to anyone who may find America offensive. The number of apologies is limitless and though some may sound hollow and disingenuous, the Navy advises all apologies will sound very sincere.

The ship's purpose is not defined so much as a unit of national defense - but instead in times of conflict the USS Clinton has orders to seek refuge in Canada. The ship may be positioned near the Democratic National Party Headquarters for photo-ops and can be used extensively for social experimentation, and whatever other worthless jobs, the ex-Commander-in-Chief and his wife can think of.

It is largely rumored that the ship will also be the set for the upcoming season of MTV's "The Real World". The ship was renamed and commissioned USS William J Clinton when someone realized the USS Blowfish was already taken.

[ltxi]

I don't care who you are this is just cool

http://www.varietyvideosllc.com/about2.html

That geezer has talent:faint2:

Dude is insane....Hat off to him!!!

[wyntrout]

A 6 year old and a 4 year old are raking the yard.






The 6 year old asks, "You know what? I think it's about time we started learning to cuss."The 4 year old nods his head in approval.






The 6 year old continues,"When we go in for breakfast, I'm gonna say something with hell and you say something with ass."






The 4 year old agrees with enthusiasm.






When the mother walks into the kitchen and asks the 6 year old what he wants for breakfast, he replies, "Aw, hell, Mom, I guess I'll have some Cheerios.






WHACK!






He flies out of his chair, tumbles across the kitchen floor, gets up,and runs upstairs crying his eyes out, with his mother in hot pursuit,slapping his rear with every step.






His mom locks him in his room and shouts, "You can stay there until I let you out!"






She then comes back downstairs, looks at the 4 year old and asks with a stern voice, "And what do YOU want for breakfast, young man?"






"I don't know," he blubbers, "but you can bet your fat ass it won't be Cheerios!"

[Armybrat]

I dare you crusty oldfarts to NOT laugh at this (babies laughing at dawgs):

http://screen.yahoo.com/blogs/screen-blog/babies-laughing-puppies-004258928.html

[Scoundrel]

I keep hoping one of them thar dogs will eat the baby.

[GROTMAN]

A 6 year old and a 4 year old are raking the yard.







The 6 year old asks, "You know what? I think it's about time we started learning to cuss."The 4 year old nods his head in approval.







The 6 year old continues,"When we go in for breakfast, I'm gonna say something with hell and you say something with ass."







The 4 year old agrees with enthusiasm.







When the mother walks into the kitchen and asks the 6 year old what he wants for breakfast, he replies, "Aw, hell, Mom, I guess I'll have some Cheerios.







WHACK!







He flies out of his chair, tumbles across the kitchen floor, gets up,and runs upstairs crying his eyes out, with his mother in hot pursuit,slapping his rear with every step.







His mom locks him in his room and shouts, "You can stay there until I let you out!"







She then comes back downstairs, looks at the 4 year old and asks with a stern voice, "And what do YOU want for breakfast, young man?"







"I don't know," he blubbers, "but you can bet your fat ass it won't be Cheerios!"



LOL !!:amflag:

[wyntrout]

I keep hoping one of them thar dogs will eat the baby.

THAT would be funny!

Wynn:D

[MW surveyor]

"tha dingo et my baby"

[Barth]

"tha dingo et my baby"
http://a4.ec-images.myspacecdn.com/profile01/118/3b4b45597b284cbd9e3559a819737cff/p.jpghttp://www.heyrick.co.uk/willow/ep4_02/willow11.jpeghttp://encycl.opentopia.com/enimages/934/933991/Dingos_Ate_My_Baby.jpg

[JFootin]

http://i1230.photobucket.com/albums/ee486/John_England/Misc/rc8y87_zps5ecd0850.jpg

[Tilos]

Good way to loose a finger:crazy:










Most likely a spoof 'cause he's wearing an ATF hat:rolleyes:

[wyntrout]

I took Wifey to Red Lobster tonight for her birthday and carried Boomer along. Just looked through the mail and had some ad from a funeral parlor... burial or cremation services! WTF! I'm only 66 but I've been getting cremation stuff... Neptune Society... long-term care ads... and now this funeral home ad today! I thought 60 was the new 40. Someone's in a hurry to profit off my departure!:rolleyes:

:behindsofa:

Wynn:)

[mr surveyor]

don't sweat it Wynn.... I started getting crap mail from aarp before I turned 40, and was no more impressed with them then as I am now.

As a "bonus", when I surveyed our latest, greatest cemetery about 15 years ago, I got my 2 graves free, and a discount for my parents, AND got to pick my location before the rush. You mean to tell me there's more to have to think about?

[jocko]

I took Wifey to Red Lobster tonight for her birthday and carried Boomer along. Just looked through the mail and had some ad from a funeral parlor... burial or cremation services! WTF! I'm only 66 but I've been getting cremation stuff... Neptune Society... long-term care ads... and now this funeral home ad today! I thought 60 was the new 40. Someone's in a hurry to profit off my departure!:rolleyes:

:behindsofa:

Wynn:)

sorry wyn, I think I gave them ur name. u see I got a free cremation for my cat if I could supply them with 15 names of "potential" people .I think some of ther kahr members might be getting the same mail.

they did do a nice job on my cat though, Just sayih:Amflag2: I sent them a 5# cat and got back 32# of ashes. Not sure yet as I am checking on it as the outside of the container was addressed to Budweiser and then crossed out and my address was put in:Amflag2:

any suggestions asto what might have happened??????

[DeaconKC]

To have fun with junk mail from organizations I don't like, I put the stuff from one into the return envelope of the other and send them back to them on their postage. [jocko made me do it!]

[ltxi]

I actually did that same sort of thingy for years!

[mr surveyor]

:spider::spider::spider: