Jocko's June Juxtaposition of Jovial Jocularity

[Bawanna]

Great gobs of goose excrement, I remembered just barely.

Let's talk guns and funny.

[Planedude]

Posted... Funny stuff!

[yqtszhj]

Man, I was afraid we were going to talk country music. I was going to have to find another forum.... just sayin.

[Bawanna]

I enjoys a song I can play backwards so it has a happy ending myself.

I'll take country any day myself, course I don't do audio none too good.

[yqtszhj]

I enjoys a song I can play backwards so it has a happy ending myself.



Good Point. Now that's a fact there.

[RevRay]

http://www.kahrtalk.com/attachment.php?attachmentid=8533&stc=1&thumb=1&d=1369953134!

Any suggestions on the proper way to unload? It's a rather general statement open to several interpretations on how to do what it asks.

[mr surveyor]

I refuse to post in the thread of the month, until that month actually arrives

[mr surveyor]

I actually refuse

[mr surveyor]

it just ain't right

[RevRay]

I refuse to post in the thread of the month, until that month actually arrives

I'm with you ... somebody's got to stand up for what is right.

[Tinman507]

http://1888.org/images/2013/01/26/9646/line-in-the-sand.jpg

[muggsy]

If you stand up for whats right everything else will be left. Now even I'm confused. What month is this?

[wyntrout]

I just about blew this one off because I don't care for June Carter Cash... that much... but my granddaughters pictures are in an album at my public profile. Click on my avatar, then see albums to the right.:D

http://www.kahrtalk.com/picture.php?pictureid=703&albumid=118&dl=1369969230&thumb=1

http://i1134.photobucket.com/albums/m620/wyntrout/LegalCCWWelcome.jpg

Wynn:D

[wyntrout]

Dang! I was looking for another gun sign image and I clicked on what I thought was another folder and clicked on "Burn"! Something hit me in the right knee... the danged CD/DVD drive tray!:rolleyes:

Wynn:D

[Bawanna]

Dang! I was looking for another gun sign image and I clicked on what I thought was another folder and clicked on "Burn"! Something hit me in the right knee... the danged CD/DVD drive tray!:rolleyes:

Wynn:D

That's the cup holder for us non computer folks.

[Bawanna]

OK, OK, I removed the Carter Cash from the title. Too many anti country music fans around here.

Next month I'll try to make Led Zeppelin at 78 speed work.

[muggsy]

I'm a little bit country and a little bit rock and roll.

[jocko]

OK, OK, I removed the Carter Cash from the title. Too many anti country music fans around here.

Next month I'll try to make Led Zeppelin at 78 speed work.

I truly love cuntry music, that is all my satellite radios are tuned in for. to my knowledge most don'thave rings i their noses, or tats up one side and won the utter and damn U CAN REALLY UNDERSTAND THEM TO.:Amflag2:

[MikeyKahr]

Uncle B, how about a rename to Jocko's June Juxtaposition of Jovial Jocularity? Just a thought.

[Bawanna]

Done. Excellent idea right there.

[b4uqzme]

:crazy:

[muggsy]

Now that's a title that a man can sink his teeth into. Of course, after he gets a taste of it he might want to spit it back out. Just sayin.

[muggsy]

My two most favoritest country and western songs is, "I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy" and "Take your tongue out of my mouth, because I'm kissin' you goodby."

[mr surveyor]

for home grown music, I'm good with Bob Wills and ZZ Top. That's Texas

[dkmatthews]

and George Strait and Lyle Lovett and Stevie Ray Vaughn and The Fabulous Thunderbirds.

[Planedude]

I've been spinning the heck out of the newest Joe Walsh...

Kind of feeling where he's coming from with Analog Man.

He it is live: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=il1Byvn_vMA

[deadeye]

Jimmy Rogers, Eddy Arnold, Hank Williams Sr., Bob Wills, Patsy Cline, Jim Reeves - oops, I'm showing my age!

[Bawanna]

Lester Flatt and Earl Scruggs?

[JohnR]

"Well, I was drunk the day my mom got out of prison..."

[JohnR]

OK, OK, I removed the Carter Cash from the title. Too many anti country music fans around here.

Next month I'll try to make Led Zeppelin at 78 speed work.

http://youtu.be/7VHNzvQKafY

[muggsy]

"Well, I was drunk the day my mom got out of prison..."

Ahhhh, the perfect C&W song. Another good un is, "I've Got Friends in Low Places." Makes me smile ever time I hears it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mvCgSqPZ4EM

[wyntrout]

I like the extended version of 'Low Places... the added stanza... or whatever that ends with grass... or something like that :D... not musically gifted or knowledgeable. Garth really turned CW on its head... or ear... appealing to more than the Country Genre... as did/does Taylor Swift.

I grew up with my mom singing Hank Williams hits... and I still hear those songs in my head... not a bad thing!

Wynn:)

[mr surveyor]

anyone remember "This Is The Shortest Song In The World"?

I think that's the only song I've ever remembered all the lyrics to.

[JohnR]

anyone remember "This Is The Shortest Song In The World"?

I think that's the only song I've ever remembered all the lyrics to.

Yes! Awesome song.

[JFootin]

anyone remember "This Is The Shortest Song In The World"?

I think that's the only song I've ever remembered all the lyrics to.

Speaking of short songs, whenever I hear the three word song at the end of every Maybelline commercial...


"Maybe it's Maybelline!"

I finish the lyric...


"Maybe it ain't!" :D

After all, they leave it open to question by saying 'maybe'. :001_tt2:

[Bawanna]

I like the extended version of 'Low Places... the added stanza... or whatever that ends with grass... or something like that :D... not musically gifted or knowledgeable. Garth really turned CW on its head... or ear... appealing to more than the Country Genre... as did/does Taylor Swift.

I grew up with my mom singing Hank Williams hits... and I still hear those songs in my head... not a bad thing!

Wynn:)

Unfortunately they contribute to the downfall of good true country music though as well. There's still a few pure Country artist out there trying to keep it alive but it ain't like it used to be.
I don't consider Taylor Swift a country singer in the loosest form of the word.
I like Garth but he was never true country either.
Taylor of course is cuter than a bugs ear so she can make whatever noise she wants and it's fine with me.

[jocko]

I just gotta go with Reba, sheis a barrel racer and u know how I like horse-- or parts of them anyhow. Just sayin

semper vulgare

besides that Reba has more class in her little finger than taylor Twitt will ever have..

[b4uqzme]

I like the extended version of 'Low Places... the added stanza... or whatever that ends with grass... or something like that :D... not musically gifted or knowledgeable. Garth really turned CW on its head... or ear... appealing to more than the Country Genre... as did/does Taylor Swift.

I grew up with my mom singing Hank Williams hits... and I still hear those songs in my head... not a bad thing!

Wynn:)

My brother in law was a bit liquored up one night and quietly singing a song. He's not one for singing in public so I just had to comment on it. He said: "you ever have one of those songs you can't get out of your head?" Well I said: "Mike, this one's leakin' out".

[LorenzoB]

A hunter has called 911.

Dispatcher: 911 what is your emergency?

Hunter: I...I think my friend is dead! He just plopped down and died!

Dispatcher: Sir please calm down first make sure he is dead.

Hunter: Okay hold on.

*The dispatcher hears 2 distinct gunshots*

Hunter: Okay now what?

[JFootin]

Borrowed from TaurusArmed. Don't ruin your keyboards! :D


The other night I was invited out for a night with the "girls." I told my husband that I would be home by midnight, "I promise!" Well, the hours passed and the margaritas went down way too easily. Around 3 a.m., a bit loaded, I headed for home. Just as I got in the door, the cuckoo clock in the hallway started up and cuckooed 3 times.

Quickly, realizing my husband would probably wake up, I cuckooed another 9 times. I was really proud of myself for coming up with such a quick-witted solution, in order to escape a possible conflict with him. (Even when totally smashed... 3 cuckoos plus 9 cuckoos totals 12 cuckoos = MIDNIGHT !)

The next morning my husband asked me what time I got in, I told him "MIDNIGHT"... he didn't seem pissed off in the least. Whew, I got away with that one! Then he said "We need a new cuckoo clock." When I asked him why, he said, "Well, last night our clock cuckooed three times, then said "oh sh!t" Cuckooed 4 more times, cleared its throat, cuckooed another three times, giggled, cuckooed twice more, and then tripped over the coffee table and farted.

[muggsy]

That's some clock!

[JohnR]

That's some clock!

That's what she said.

[ltxi]

A hunter has called 911.

Dispatcher: 911 what is your emergency?

Hunter: I...I think my friend is dead! He just plopped down and died!

Dispatcher: Sir please calm down first make sure he is dead.

Hunter: Okay hold on.

*The dispatcher hears 2 distinct gunshots*

Hunter: Okay now what?

All Time Top 49

[yqtszhj]

What do you expect? The women are all covered up.

http://cnt.winkal.com/50b5d2e7e4b04ff650622cc0/Ojk5_700.1.jpg

[Tinman507]

My Medical Appointment

I visited a physician last week who was quite enthusiastic. It was a “new” doctor in the practice, a young lady (at MY age, EVERYBODY is “young”! When I was born, the Dead Sea wasn‘t even sick!)

She was obviously a liberal by her dress and manner. I was thinking of hitting on her, but I don’t like the phrase she used, “You remind me of my grandfather.”

She asked me what was wrong, and I replied,
“I have a cut on my leg; and I think it may be getting infected.”

She said, “Before we start, I have to ask you a few questions.
Are you allergic to any medications?”
I replied, “No.”

She said, “Do you have any guns in the house?”
I said, “HUH??”

She replied, “Guns. Do you have any guns in the house?”
I asked, “Why?”

She said,
“I’ve got to ask this question. It is required under the Affordable Care Act.”

I asked,
“What are you going to do with the data?”

She said,
“We compile it, amalgamate it, and submit it to the government.”

I said,
“Well, I have a Tommy Gun. I let my kid Tommy play with it.”

She said,
“What’s a Tommy Gun?
I don‘t think that is the kind of gun they are concerned with.”

With THAT, I knew I had a live one.
I said, “It’s similar to a B.A.R., but a little heavier and shorter.
I have a B.A.R. also.”

She said, “A B.A.R.?”

I said, “Yes.”

She looked puzzled.
Then she brightened up and asked,
“Do you have any assault rifles?”

I attempted to look puzzled, and said,
“I don’t know. What is an assault rifle?”

She said,
“That’s a gun that is used in wars.”

I said, “As a matter of fact, I do.
I have a replica of a Revolutionary War musket.”

She began to look a bit exasperated. I pretended not to notice and kept up the appearance of trying to be helpful. She said,
“Do you have anything more modern than that?”

I replied,
“Well, yes I do. I have a replica muzzle loader from the Civil War. Do you know the difference between a musket and a muzzle loader?”

She rather peevishly said,
“No, I don’t; and I don’t want to.
What else do you have?”

I said, “I have an M-1.”

She asked, “What’s that?”

I said, “A rifle.”

She asked, “What kind?”

I replied, “It is called a Garand.”

She rather loudly said,
“I don’t care if it is a grand rifle or not.
Is it an assault rifle?”

To which I replied,
“I don’t know. I don’t know what an assault rifle is. You say it’s a rifle used in war, yet you say that my musket and muzzle loader are not assault rifles.”

She calmed down (a bit) and asked,
“Anything else?”

I said,
“I have an MG-.30, and an MG-.50.
I‘m also part owner of an Apache.
But they are not rifles.”

She stated,
“Well, then, I’m not interested in them.
Anything else.”

I replied,
“Well, yes. I also have a 12-gauge and a 20-gauge pump.
They are not rifled though.”

She said,
“I’m not interested in pumps; I’m interested in guns.”

I replied,
“Well, then, I have a Colt, a Luger, a Glock, a bazooka, a Parabellum, a Kalishnikov, a Henry, an Uzi, a Llama, and a Beretta--but they are not rifles.”

She then said,
“I’ve had enough of this.
I think you’re toying with me.
Let me see your leg.”

I then said,
“Excuse me, but before you look at my leg,
I have a few questions to ask of you.”

She replied,
“Of course. What are they?”

I said,
“I have given you a lot of information about my guns. I am somewhat concerned about your knowledge and ability to assimilate, make coherent sense of that information, and report it correctly. Do you know the difference between a .22 caliber and a .223 caliber? It’s a rather fundamental difference.”

She replied,
“Actually, I don’t.”

I said,
“I see. Let me ask some more relevant questions.
“How much money do you make?”

She said,
“That’s personal, why do you ask?”

I said,
“Well, in pushing the Health Care Act, my president cautioned the population about doctors that would amputate a leg rather than treat a cut because they make more money that way. Consequently, I wish to know if you are financially troubled. What kind of car do you drive? What are your house payments? How much is your mortgage? How much credit card debt do you have? Do you have a student loan; if so, how much?”

She said,
“I’m not going to answer those questions.
You have no right to ask them.”

I then asked,
“Do you have training and education in homeopathic techniques? Do you know the benefits/effects of CoQ10, ginseng, fish oil, Creatine, BCAA, and other such herbal treatments?” Do you know the difference between Panax ginseng, American ginseng, and Siberian ginseng?”

She replied,
“Well, No!”

I then asked,
”Well, have you studied it at all?”

She replied rather defensively,
“NO; it’s all a bunch of hogwash anyway!”

I said,
“Oh, then you have read the research on it.
What have you read?”

She then said,
“I don’t waste my time reading such things.
Why are you asking me these questions?”

I said,
“Well, if I’m going to turn my body over to you for treatment, I believe it is reasonable for me to know something about your motivation, training, experience, and competence. Do you know anything about the practice of holistic medicine?”

She said, rather angrily
“No, I don’t!”

I said,
“Oh. O.K.
How much experience do you have in practicing medicine?”

She replied,
“Well, not very much.”

To which I said, “Well, we all have to start somewhere. What medical school did you go to; what is its rank in terms of other medical schools; where did you intern; and where did you do your residency? What is the rank of the hospital where you did your internship and residency?”

She rather peevishly said,
“All my credentials are posted in the waiting room.”

To which I said,
“Really? The rank of your medical school is posted in the waiting room?
Do you have any experience with leg injuries?
If so, how much?”

I guess that was too much for her. She rather crossly said,
“I think it would be best if you saw a different doctor.”
...and started to leave the room.

I said,
“You know, doctor. You asked me irrelevant questions about my guns, and I answered them. Whether or not I own guns is really none of your business and has absolutely nothing to do with any treatment you might prescribe. On the other hand, I ask you questions quite relevant to my situation, and you refuse to answer them. Isn’t that somewhat backwards?”

She said,
“But I HAVE to ask those questions.
It’s the law.”

To which I replied,
“Actually, it is NOT the law.
Here is what the law says--taken directly from the Affordable Care Act:”

(1) WELLNESS AND PREVENTION PROGRAMS. A wellness and health promotion activity implemented under subsection (a) (1) (D) may not require the disclosure or collection of any information relating to—

(A) the presence or storage of a lawfully-possessed firearm or ammunition in the residence or on the property of an individual; or

(B) the lawful use, possession, or storage of a firearm or ammunition by an individual.

(2) LIMITATION ON DATA COLLECTION.
None of the authorities provided to the Secretary under the Patient Protection and Affordable Care Act or an amendment made by that Act shall be construed to authorize or may be used for the collection of any information relating to—

(A) the lawful ownership or possession of a firearm or ammunition;
(B) the lawful use of a firearm or ammunition; or
(C) the lawful storage of a firearm or ammunition.

You may verify this at: http://housedocs.house.gov/energycommerce/ppacacon.pdf ‘and’

http://wizbangblog.com/2013/01/10/obamacare-amendment-does-not-forbid-gun-and-ammo-registration/.”

“As you can see, you have broken federal law TWICE--once by asking, and once by collecting data. It is perfectly legal for me to own guns; it is NOT legal for you to ask and/or collect such data.

YOU are breaking the law, and yet YOU are the one that is angry. Not only that, but you erroneously stated that you must ask such questions, and you did it in a very authoritative and convincing manner.

You gave me false information, which I then acted upon by answering your questions. On that basis, how can I be expected to trust your medical judgment? When I attempted to ascertain your medical competency, you became defensive and hostile.”

“There is really no need for me to see another doctor in this practice.
I‘ll go somewhere else, where my privacy is respected, and I can trust the information I receive.”

[jimsea]

A hunter has called 911.

Dispatcher: 911 what is your emergency?

Hunter: I...I think my friend is dead! He just plopped down and died!

Dispatcher: Sir please calm down first make sure he is dead.

Hunter: Okay hold on.

*The dispatcher hears 2 distinct gunshots*

Hunter: Okay now what?


ha ha
:D

[bob98366]

Tinman, thanks for the Obamacare link. Good to know. FWIW, the firearms quote is on page 20.

[Barth]

http://news.yahoo.com/indonesia-axes-bikinis-2013-miss-world-pageant-100753823.html
http://l2.yimg.com/bt/api/res/1.2/ez1tNirwXjozVqlzDuEGAg--/YXBwaWQ9eW5ld3M7Y2g9MjAzMztjcj0xO2N3PTMwMDA7ZHg9MD tkeT0wO2ZpPXVsY3JvcDtoPTQyNztxPTg1O3c9NjMw/http://l.yimg.com/os/publish-images/news/2013-06-06/9096940b-d8ab-4486-a93b-ca21431d8204_72054918.jpghttp://a57.foxnews.com/global.fncstatic.com/static/managed/img/Entertainment/660/371/miss%20world%20bikinis%204.JPG?ve=1

JAKARTA, Indonesia (AP) —
Miss World has axed the famed bikinis from this year's pageant in Indonesia,
replacing the skimpy swimsuits with conservative beach sarongs
amid mounting protests from hard-line Muslim groups.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Say it ain't so!!!!
I'm all for freedom of religion. But this is just too much!

[Bawanna]

That's just perfect. Lord knows I don't want to offend no hard line muslim.

I say send the UN with their blue bonnets packing and take the Miss World pageant with them. Indonesia of all places, probably no beer or nascar there anyhow.

I say stick with Miss America pageant and the very first walk down the runway is leading a pig while eating a bacon sandwich.

[Tinman507]

https://sphotos-a.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-prn1/941704_397389553711842_2124976280_n.jpg

[jocko]

jocko and bawanna, what a team.. I lovemy new heals. Just sayin

[Bawanna]

That chair is gay, I ain't riding in that.

[jocko]

That's just perfect. Lord knows I don't want to offend no hard line muslim.

I say send the UN with their blue bonnets packing and take the Miss World pageant with them. Indonesia of all places, probably no beer or nascar there anyhow.

I say stick with Miss America pageant and the very first walk down the runway is leading a pig while eating a bacon sandwich.

check the 6th one from the left. I would say size 38C. Just sayin:Amflag2:

[jocko]

That chair is gay, I ain't riding in that.

that is Honda's new electric trike in psycodylic colors. U look good in it colonel.

u said nutting about my heals though:(

[Bawanna]

check the 6th one from the left. I would say size 38C. Just sayin:Amflag2:

Along with teeth a beaver would be proud to have.

[jocko]

actually never even looked at her face. damn ur picky, expecially being from washington who in class is about two levels above squid sh!t. Just sayin

check out the tatoo above the left "bump". Its a HD tatoo, and says long live ol jocko. :amflag:

[OldLincoln]

Wow, that's a GREAT idea!!! Much rather watch them prance around nude than in those skimpy bikinis!

[Bawanna]

Now there's a man with his thinking straight.....

[ltxi]

That chair is gay, I ain't riding in that.

I thoghts taht wus yuo puhsin frm bck n tha dey whn frm n san frncisco sixtays r sos

[Barth]

Police in Berlin break up topless protest by feminist activists
http://www.foxnews.com/world/2013/06/07/police-in-berlin-break-up-topless-protest-by-femenist-activists/
http://a57.foxnews.com/global.fncstatic.com/static/managed/img/World/660/371/Germany%20Topless%20Prote_Angu.jpg?ve=1

[jocko]

I wonderif he frisked her??? Just saying. Dumb B!tchs.. I betthey realy made a point to-- Huh???

[Barth]

I wonderif he frisked her??? Just saying. Dumb B!tchs.. I betthey realy made a point to-- Huh???

It appears that they made two points!
http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-UtRxfOFD7lA/T6-vwRSAmKI/AAAAAAAA5fw/MsGE6Y8sxXo/s1600/Hooters_Logo.jpghttp://s3.fuel.tv/1341249484-300x400_Hooters_2011-DreamGirl.jpeghttp://gulfcoast.metromix.com/content_image/full/1045669/750

Do we need a KahrTalk Poll on which contestant wins?

[jocko]

#25 no doubt, 37 would be next. #12 next. 22 and 14 can home and try again. Jocko now Rests.

My wish today woud be a bikini top on #25. Just sayin

semper vulgare

[ltxi]

#25 no doubt, 37 would be next. #12 next. 22 and 14 can home and try again. Jocko now Rests.

My wish today woud be a bikini top on #25. Just sayin

semper vulgare

That small birthmark is a nice accent

[jocko]

lots like a tat to me.. I think it says, I love u jocko. Just sayin

[ltxi]

lots like a tat to me.. I think it says, I love u jocko. Just sayin

Focus, jocko....#25, not that #12 chick.

[jocko]

u mean that little mole mark on her left bump..

[ltxi]

That would be her right boob and it ain't a mole. It's a birthmark. Let's concentrate here.

[Bawanna]

Sick bastards. Every one of those is somebodies daughter.:)

[ltxi]

So were my all wives and my really hot niece. What's your point.

[Bawanna]

I forget:confused:

[jocko]

he jealous Itxi. seen his kind many times. Just sayin. If he can'thave um all, he doesn't want anyone else to have even one. Its called "greed". Just sayin

I guess ur right on the right and left bump thing. My eyes get tangled up when I STARE but its a damn mole--geez birthmark???:amflag: Next thing ur gonna tellmeis those bumps are aretificial!!! Just sayin

[Bawanna]

A bright spot in my day.

There's a report that down in Brazil a dirt bag raped and killed a young woman 30 I think. He was 17. They figured out who he was and at the woman's funeral a bunch of the villagers went and caught him, tied him up and tossed him in the grave, then put the coffin on top of him and filled up the hole.

Buried the dude alive.

Now that's justice right there. The villagers even blocked the roads into town so the policia and the military couldn't get in.

I guess lynching's are pretty common too due to few police around.

[jocko]

big score.

[ltxi]

I was gonna make some snide assed remark but thought better of it. I've always loved real frontier justice. :cool:

[jocko]

why start now to hold back????Just sayin

What does "snide" mean? Just sayin

[ltxi]

It's a euphemism for ass hole.

[jocko]

wellwhy didn't u just say that.Makes alot of sense.

sempervulgare.

now WTF is euphemism??? Geez u guys are gettinout of hand. Just sayin

[ltxi]

Ok....get your eyes out of #12's crotch tattoo and let's concentrate here. euphemism = just another way of sayin'. So, in this case, snide is just another way of sayin' either you and/or I, and maybe the Col are ass holes.

[JFootin]

#25 no doubt, 37 would be next. #12 next. 22 and 14 can home and try again. Jocko now Rests.

My wish today woud be a bikini top on #25. Just sayin

semper vulgare

Hey Jocko, where is number 37? You ranked the invisible woman second place.

[wyntrout]

Well, speaking of chicks... newly hatched ones... I posted a few pictures of my granddaughter. Click on the avatar.

Wynn:)

[Bawanna]

Very nice, very cute Wynn. Growing fast already huh?

[wyntrout]

Just over 15... days old... and gained about a pound... but just so aware and focused... when awake. She will just study a face and you can see her eyes going around the outside of a new face and then each part of the face as if she's memorizing the details.

We leave tomorrow and the time has just flown!

No ammo available in Paducah, KY, on the way. I hope to stop by Barrett's Outpost Armory in Tennessee on the way home and look for some different .22LR that I need for my TacSol .22 conversion.

I don't really need anything else ammo-wise, but will just see what is available and the prices.

Wynn:)

[DeaconKC]

Wynn, thanks for the call! It was great to speak with you, have a great time Gramps!

[OldLincoln]

Grandkids are nice. Did you name her Wynnette?

[wyntrout]

It was nice to talk to you, too, Kevin.:)

She's named Cayla Alana... Alana was my sister.

We have to depart tomorrow. We probably won't be back until her first birthday... maybe.

Wynn:)

[LorenzoB]

Remora Holsters has some Father's day deals.
The first one is kind of funny when you stop and think about it.
I prefer a wallet I can easily get out of my pocket. :rolleyes:

8592


... on a more serious note... here is 30% off.

8593

[JFootin]

http://i1230.photobucket.com/albums/ee486/John_England/Political%20Humor/57642d1370912333-post-your-funny-pics-part-three-s-not-hard-wyoming1_zps1e6d0ca2.png

[jocko]

http://i1230.photobucket.com/albums/ee486/John_England/Political%20Humor/57642d1370912333-post-your-funny-pics-part-three-s-not-hard-wyoming1_zps1e6d0ca2.png

but only 6 people livein Whyoming:behindsofa:

[Bawanna]

Definitely my kind of place. Last time I checked they were 5 people per square mile, so that means with the big cities there has to be lots of square mile with no people at all.

One of them is meant for me. We'll call it bawanna's mile.

[wyntrout]

Is that one of the states that rich liberals and other celebrities are moving... then they want to change it... as they did Washington State, Colorado, and others??

Wynn:)

[OldLincoln]

I would be surprised to see many fair weather liberals moving that far North. With only 3 electoral votes and nearly 70% Republican I think they prefer Florida and Texas.

I spent a short time in Goose Bay Labrador when it was quite chilly. The base has underground tunnels between all the buildings so it wasn't too bad. If Bawanna were to get his mile in a little valley we could all build an underground town and fill in the valley. Leave the top dished for a lake and water supply. No need to build a bomb shelter, just live in a very nice one.

[Bawanna]

See it's already happening. I get my mile and california wants to move in and build a city:)

You and Mr.s Old Lincoln are welcome anytime, but mostly everybody get your own mile and we can be neighbors. Them cold winters is the only real downfall to me in Wyoming, mighty pretty country. I could easily finish my days just looking at it from my very large man cave window.

I tried to hire on with Ballard Rifle in Cody, was close too. In a big metal building with no windows though. Probably planned that way, would never get anything done if you had a window to look out at the scenery.

[ltxi]

but only 6 people livein Whyoming:behindsofa:

Damn....you beat me to it!

[ltxi]

Definitely my kind of place. Last time I checked they were 5 people per square mile, so that means with the big cities there has to be lots of square mile with no people at all.

One of them is meant for me. We'll call it bawanna's mile.

You should definitely move there. If you do, come down and visit. Just be sure to get a carry permit (WY still issues) so you can cc in Colorado.

[downtownv]

Chew tobacco, Chew tobacco, Chew tobacco SPIT!

[jeepster09]

but only 6 people livein Whyoming:behindsofa:


Back when I lived in Laramie, they even had markmenship as a school class for the kids. We almost bought a house there with it's own in-door shooting range in the basement....I loved living there.
School's also had rodeo class and every weekend they had a rodeo for the kids to compete in. I miss Laramie!:amflag: I also remember back when I was there a semi passing through on I80 ran a local off the road and the local emptied his 357 in the semi's radiator. The trucker called police and was told that the guy had a right to defend himself! The trucker then told our local reporter he learned that from now on he would try to avoid any conflict when passing through :eek:

[Bawanna]

When we took my daughter to school over there north of Cody, they had a rodeo every night all summer long. And it wasn't a podunk rodeo neither, it was a good one.

I could spend a good amount of time in that Buffalo Bill museum, if you ever get near, its a must stop and check out thing. Plan on a very long day and 3 days would be better.

[bob98366]

Jocko, the Pope is into Harleys:
http://bigstory.ap.org/article/pope-blesses-hundreds-harley-davidsons

[jocko]

Yes indeed he is into Harley's. That guy in the photo we found out is a NSA agent trying to figure out where he can hide some NSA listening devices,for he heard on some tapped hone lines that Harley riders have ties to Muzzy's. That might be a rumor. Course I trust ou7r government to do no wron, so I told the pr!ck he could put 5 of those devices on my bike.. Just sayin

[OldLincoln]

Men don't listen

ED and Nancy met while on a singles cruise, and Ed fell head over heels for her.

When they discovered they lived in the same city, only a few miles apart, Ed was ecstatic.

He immediately started asking her out when they got home. Within a couple of weeks, Ed had taken Nancy to dance clubs, restaurants, concerts, movies, and museums. Ed became convinced that Nancy was indeed his soul mate and true love. Every date seemed better than the last.

On the one-month anniversary of their first dinner on the cruise ship, Ed took Nancy to a fine restaurant. While having cocktails and waiting for their salad, Ed said, "I guess you can tell I'm very much in love with you. I'd like a little serious talk before our relationship continues to the next stage. So, before I get a box out of my jacket, and ask you a life- changing question, it's only fair to warn you, I'm a total golf nut. I play golf, I read about golf, I watch golf on TV. In short, I eat, sleep, and breathe golf. If that's going to be a problem for us, you'd better say so now!"

Nancy took a deep breath and responded, " Ed , that certainly won't be a problem. I love you as you are, and I love golf too; but, since we're being totally honest with each other, you need to know that, for the last five years, I've been a hooker."

Ed replied, "I bet it's because you're not keeping your wrists straight when you hit the ball..."

[Tinman507]

In ancient Israel, it came to pass that a trader by the name of Abraham Com did take unto himself a healthy young wife by the name of Dorothy.

And Dot Com was a comely woman, Large of breast, broad of shoulder and long of leg. Indeed, she was often called Amazon Dot Com.

And she said unto Abraham, her husband, "Why dost thou travel so far from town to town with thy goods when thou canst trade without ever leaving thy tent?"

And Abraham did look at her as though she were several saddle bags short of a camel load, but simply said, "How, dear?"

And Dot replied, "I will place drums in all the towns and drums in between to send messages saying what you have for sale, and they will reply telling you who hath the best price. The sale can be made on the drums and delivery made by Uriah's Pony Stable (UPS)."

Abraham thought long and decided he would let Dot have her way with the drums.

And the drums rang out and were an immediate success. Abraham sold all the goods he had at the top price, without ever having to move from his tent.

To prevent neighbouring countries from overhearing what the drums were saying, Dot devised a system that only she and the drummers knew. It was known as Must Send Drum Over Sound (MSDOS), and she also developed a language to transmit ideas and pictures - Hebrew To The People (HTTP).

And the young men did take to Dot Com's trading as doth the greedy horsefly take to camel dung. They were called Nomadic Ecclesiastical Rich Dominican Sybarites, or NERDS.

And lo, the land was so feverish with joy at the new riches and the deafening sound of drums that no one noticed that the real riches were going to that enterprising drum dealer, Brother William of Gates, who bought off every drum maker in the land. Indeed he did insist on drums to be made that would work only with Brother Gates' drumheads and drumsticks.

And Dot did say, "Oh, Abraham, what we have started is being taken over by others."

And Abraham looked out over the Bay of Ezekiel, or eBay as it came to be known.

He said, "We need a name that reflects what we are."

And Dot replied, "Young Ambitious Hebrew Owner Operators."

"YAHOO," said Abraham.

And because it was Dot's idea, they named it YAHOO Dot Com.

Abraham's cousin, Joshua, being the young Gregarious Energetic Educated Kid (GEEK) that he was, soon started using Dot's drums to locate things around the countryside.

It soon became known as God's Own Official Guide to Locating Everything (GOOGLE).

That is how it all began. And that's the truth.

[Glock23]

^^Nice!

[ltxi]

excellent!

[JFootin]

We really need a LIKE button on this forum! :)

[JFootin]

Clinton Library Is now opened.....
and they have unveiled the Official portrait:

http://i1230.photobucket.com/albums/ee486/John_England/Political%20Humor/58307d1371689951-post-your-funny-pics-part-three-s-not-hard-clinton-animated1_zpse96156da.gif\

[MW surveyor]

This rehab inactivity is good but tends to be boring. So for something different today..............

I had the wife take me to Lowes. I then bought her an electric start self propelled lawn mower! Free delivery and set up!

Course I'll be able to use it in about 3 months or so after the sternum heals.

[OldLincoln]

Nasa sets Grand Challenge to public: find earth-destroying asteroids

White House and space agency launch search to help prevent mankind going the way of the dinosaur


http://static.guim.co.uk/sys-images/Guardian/Pix/GWeekly/2013/6/19/1371652798842/asteroid-meteor-search-009.jpg

All they have to do is make an X-Box type game that logs into telescopes and turn them loose.

I remember in high school in 1957 where a couple brainacs made a receiver that was tuned to Sputnik. It was a big deal hearing that "beep" from space.

[ltxi]

White House and space agency launch search to help prevent mankind going the way of the dinosaur.....and just why is it we would want to do this?

[Tinman507]

https://sphotos-b.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-frc3/390163_409285019188962_438065636_n.jpg

[wyntrout]

Dang! I need to look at the "Hairy Rosie O'Donnel" picture to replace that one in my mind! :puke:

Wynn:D

[OldLincoln]

Yup that one's a piece of work. Nice of her to carry a pee jug and catheter rather then just go in the street like so many others.

[MikeyKahr]

I am so glad I haven't eaten dinner yet.

[Bawanna]

I may never eat again.

[ltxi]

Sent that pic to my sister. Said she really needed to stop showing off like that. Her answer would make even Jocko's ears bleed. Didn't know wimmen 'new words like taht. ouch!

[Bawanna]

Just saw this in my Brownell's newsletter. Made me smile.

THREE TRAVELERS AT THE FARMHOUSE




Three men were traveling in rural America when their car came to grief, whereupon they sought shelter at the nearest farmhouse.

The farmer had two spare beds, and, of course, his daughters's, but since he had heard all of those stories he informed the men that one of them would have to sleep in the barn. One of them, a very polite Hindu mathematician, immediately volunteered and went out to the barn. A short time later there was a knock on the door, and, sure enough, there was the Hindu, very apologetically explaining that there were cows in the barn, and because of his religious convictions, he didn't think he could remain there.

A second man, a conservative rabbi, now volunteered and went. But a short time later, there was a knock on the door. Sure enough, he too was back, explaining that since there was a pig in the barn, he too would be quite uncomfortable out there.

Whereupon the third man, a practicing lawyer, agreeably proceeded out to the barn.

In a little while, there was a knock on the door. And when they went to answer it, sure enough, there were the cows and the pig.

[MikeyKahr]

Good one uncle B!

[getsome]

Thanks Bawann, will be using that one soon!

[Tinman507]

http://i1147.photobucket.com/albums/o542/tinman507/countrymusic_zps615affea.jpg

[wyntrout]

Well, DRAT! I thought that I had scored some cheap 9mm at Sportsman's Guide and used a $25 coupon to get 4x250 rounds delivered for $203 something. I posted the find on our "Share ammo finds" link and pasted the info... noticed out of stock... deleted posts... got new email:


We are sorry for any inconvenience, but not all of the items from your order can be shipped.
Below is the list of items that could not ship complete. All other items should have shipped or are shipping soon.


Description Quantity Ordered Quantity Available Quantity Sold Out Notes 250 RDS 9MM LUGER 115 GR FMJ 4 0 4 Sold Out
We have not charged your charge card for any of the above unavailable items.
If you paid by money order or check for any sold out or restricted items, you will receive a refund check in a separate mailing.


We are sorry for any inconvenience this may cause you.

WAH!

I did get my 1,000 rounds of Colt 40-gr .22LR RN from them today... which might work in my TSG-22 .22LR Glock conversion kit.

First I have to FIX the new G19 Gen 4 that stopped working (unfired, except LT-40 LaserLyte cartridge practice) after *** UPS truck just slowed down, but passed on by... already had FedEx and USPS deliveries*** I installed several goodies... wasn't resetting trigger every time... took it apart several times... last by removing back plate because couldn't fire... no reset at all... and couldn't get the danged slide off without removing the back plate and striker, etc.:(

I'll have to check for parts and all installed... thought so!:rolleyes:

Glock mag count down to 65... sent two more GL22 to my son!

Wynn:)

[Bawanna]

New derelict off road vehicle. Thinking about getting me one, guess it does require legs.

[jocko]

love the suspenders. Just sayin. u also should keep wearing those waders, for all the crapola u spread on this forum..

[ltxi]

Love it. I gonna get my brother-in-law/cousin one for his 80th comin' up in August. Thirty five years of MS just caught up with him this past month. Whole life rugged guy who ain't at all happy/be very depressed about the concept of a walker.

[wyntrout]

I still like this one:

http://www.neatorama.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/hunting-chair-4.jpg

But some kind of roll cage would be nice... as well as a pintle mount... or turret!

Or a danged CAGE to keep the BIG ones from eating YOU!:eek:

http://www.benzworld.org/forums/attachments/unimog/381569d1308334405-ot-unitrac-wheelchair-20110617__bartabear-p1.jpg

Wynn:D

[ltxi]

What is that and where can I research it/get one? Serious.

[wyntrout]

I just Googled "tracked wheelchair":

https://www.google.com/search?q=tracked+wheelchair&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8&aq=t&rls=org.mozilla:en-US:official&client=firefox-a

And here:

http://www.actiontrackchair.com/

Wynn:)

[Bawanna]

I'd dig a walker myself, that would be an improvement.

That chair is very cool but they are very tough for a derelict to get in and out of.

I laugh, I see them at the sportsman shows and stuff around here and they are usually surrounded by guys with legs all standing around talking. Can't get close to really look at it and the sales guys don't seem to have the time of day for a wheelchair user. Can't sell too many I don't think, certainly none to me for sure.

That would be the ticket for my annual lake trip. Be able to get around the beach some. Better close ups of mermaids and such.

I'd probably hunt again if I got one. Around here they close off roads to vehicles but give derelicts keys so we can drive in a ways. Drive in some, mount your tank chair and a guy could get out there pretty good.

Guess you'd be toast if you broke down but I'm sure I could come up with some hunting partners.

The outfit that makes the Sedgeway makes a chair that is wicked cool but it's a pricey unit. Stands up on two wheels to reach high shelves or look at people in the eye. Goes up and down stairs, will run in sand too.
I'd be wearing a helmet though, my luck I'd be extended up and the battery would go kaput and crash city for bawanna.

[ltxi]

I just Googled "tracked wheelchair":

https://www.google.com/search?q=tracked+wheelchair&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8&aq=t&rls=org.mozilla:en-US:official&client=firefox-a

And here:

http://www.actiontrackchair.com/

Wynn:)

Thank you!

[Bawanna]

Here's one version of the Sedgeway I hadn't seen before.

http://www.bing.com/videos/search?q=segway+wheelchairs+youtube&view=detail&mid=6334D752D3E89B0590566334D752D3E89B059056&first=0&FORM=NVPFVR&qpvt=segway+wheelchairs+youtube

[ltxi]

I'd dig a walker myself, that would be an improvement.

That chair is very cool but they are very tough for a derelict to get in and out of.

I laugh, I see them at the sportsman shows and stuff around here and they are usually surrounded by guys with legs all standing around talking. Can't get close to really look at it and the sales guys don't seem to have the time of day for a wheelchair user. Can't sell too many I don't think, certainly none to me for sure.

That would be the ticket for my annual lake trip. Be able to get around the beach some. Better close ups of mermaids and such.

I'd probably hunt again if I got one. Around here they close off roads to vehicles but give derelicts keys so we can drive in a ways. Drive in some, mount your tank chair and a guy could get out there pretty good.

Guess you'd be toast if you broke down but I'm sure I could come up with some hunting partners.

The outfit that makes the Sedgeway makes a chair that is wicked cool but it's a pricey unit. Stands up on two wheels to reach high shelves or look at people in the eye. Goes up and down stairs, will run in sand too.
I'd be wearing a helmet though, my luck I'd be extended up and the battery would go kaput and crash city for bawanna.

Thing is, my bthr-n-lw/cousin hasn't completely lost the use of his legs although he now can't walk unaided.
He appears more 60 than 80 but due to and despite MS impairment, he's been actively maintaining an 18 acre/8 acre in lawn homestead the last 27 years as his primary job....along with doing whatever to my sister.
His legs may come back from this nasty exacerbation but if not I'm interested any solution that can keep him outdoor, property cruising mobile.

[ltxi]

Here's one version of the Sedgeway I hadn't seen before.

http://www.bing.com/videos/search?q=segway+wheelchairs+youtube&view=detail&mid=6334D752D3E89B0590566334D752D3E89B059056&first=0&FORM=NVPFVR&qpvt=segway+wheelchairs+youtube

Thanks, Bawanna. Much appreciated!

[RevRay]

Oh, good, it's safe to come back onto this thread now I see ... just as the month's winding down.

[TheTman]

Wonder if this is anyone we know?

http://kartalk.pccomps.com/olbiker.jpg

[yqtszhj]

Wonder if this is anyone we know?

http://kartalk.pccomps.com/olbiker.jpg

I think there's a PM9J in his pocket.

[JFootin]

Borrowed from TaurusArmed.net.

New Senior's Exam, need 4 out of 10 to pass.

1) How long did the Hundred Years' War last?

2) Which country makes Panama hats?

3) From which animal do we get cat gut?

4) In which month do Russians celebrate the October Revolution?

5) What is a camel's hair brush made of?

6) The Canary Islands in the Pacific are named after what animal?

7) What was King George VI's first name?

8) What color is a purple finch?

9) Where are Chinese gooseberries from?

10) What is the color of the black box in a commercial airplane?
.
.
Remember, you need only 4 correct answers to pass.

Check your answers below ....
.
.
.
.
.

ANSWERS TO THE QUIZ

1) How long did the Hundred Years War last? 116 years

2) Which country makes Panama hats? Ecuador

3) From which animal do we get cat gut? Sheep and Horses

4) In which month do Russians celebrate the October Revolution? November

5) What is a camel's hair brush made of? Squirrel fur

6) The Canary Islands in the Pacific are named after what animal? Dogs

7) What was King George VI's first name? Albert

8) What color is a purple finch? Crimson

9) Where are Chinese gooseberries from? New Zealand

10) What is the color of the black box in a commercial airplane? Orange (of course)

What do you mean, you failed?

Me, too!

(And if you try to tell me you passed, you LIED!)

[jlottmc]

Actually, I did pass. I know a little about history, and trivia. I missed the hundred years war by four years.

[OldLincoln]

Actually, I did pass. I know a little about history, and trivia. I missed the hundred years war by four years.

Dang, I didn't know you was that old! I missed Korea about the same, almost was a tweener for that and VN.

[wyntrout]

Dang! it's July first already!

Did anyone mention or bring up the 19 firefighters who died in Arizona. I hope that everyone remembers them and their families and friends in their prayers. It's hard to believe that tragedies like this can still happen with all of our technological advancements. I am really shocked and saddened that these real heroes have perished. They put their lives on the line for Arizona residents and wildlife... and paid the ultimate price. Rest in Peace brave firefighters.

Wynn

[jlottmc]

We had a Deputy die, and an Officer hurt pretty bad little way from here. I was BSing with some hose draggers, and we came to the conclusion that we think the other plum crazy. I think we can all agree that smoke jumpers are truly nuts. They knew the risks, but my heart still goes out to their families.

[Barth]

I think there's a PM9J in his pocket.

And it's ported too.
Wonder who he could be?
There's something very familiar about that guy...
http://vosperdruiter.files.wordpress.com/2013/06/0901_hrbp_07_z2006_harley_davidson_street_glidewhe elie.jpg

[jocko]

trust me barth, that is in no way ol jocko. I do have two Street glides like that but I couldn't do that if I tried, . This guy is good, maybe stupid but good. I value my bike to much to lay it down let alone I value ol jocko. At my age to, I am avery cautious rider to

Stupid is as stupid does: Forrest gump.

[ltxi]

And it's ported too.
Wonder who he could be?
There's something very familiar about that guy...
http://vosperdruiter.files.wordpress.com/2013/06/0901_hrbp_07_z2006_harley_davidson_street_glidewhe elie.jpg

....and then a couple seconds later the pipe caught the asphalt.