Marchs Melody of Madness and Mischief

[Bawanna]

Only fun stuff here. No politics. No bickering.

Let the games begin.

[RevRay]

My granddaughter, Lucy Emma, turns one year old tomorrow. Hard to believe I've already been a grandpa that long.

[olympicmotorcars]

I have a one year old grandson Rev, maybe we should introduce them.

[wyntrout]

You have me beat. Mine's barely 9 months. Her first birthday is May 24th and THAT's the day my 50th class reunion starts... but I already promised to be there for my first grandchild's first birthday.

I HAD been looking forward to our 50th class reunion... but, they waited too long to come up with a date. We have been having them in October to coincide with the Balloon Fair or whatever at Natchez. One of our classmates owns a 4-story or so building with a great rooftop terrace next to the MS River where the Balloon Fest/Fair is held. Oh well....

Wynn:)

[Bawanna]

Guess I'll be a grandpa in about 6 months.

[wyntrout]

Nice... from the "shotgun wedding"? That has been a while!

Wynn:D

[Bawanna]

Yup that's the one.

[JohnR]

I reach the half century mark in 9 days.

[muggsy]

Yer just a kid, John. I have underwear older than you and two grand kids three and nine months. They grow fast. I was a new dad just a few years ago. Now my kids are in their forties. I can't figure out what happened.

[olympicmotorcars]

Dont worry JohnR, 50 is not much different than 40. Also I am a Kung Fu fan myself but I do miss your old avatar.

[JohnR]

I got the boxed set of every Kung Fu episode for Christmas, wish I could find time to watch them all again.

Muggs, I have a three year old and a thirteen year old and I thought they were spread out!

[Bawanna]

I really dug Kung Fu too. Would be cool to watch every episode from the start once again.

[TheTman]

Kung Fu is available on Netflix, you have to rent the DVD's, instead of the instant watch, but they are available.

[rjt123]

I really dug Kung Fu too. Would be cool to watch every episode from the start once again.


Patience, Grasshopper!

The first time I said that to my now 15 YO daughter, I had to take some time to 'splain. :D

[Bawanna]

Ain't nothing, first time I said when you can hit the snatch with the pebble it's time for you to go, man did I get some serious concerned looks.

[ltxi]

Yer just a kid, John. I have underwear older than you and two grand kids three and nine months. They grow fast. I was a new dad just a few years ago. Now my kids are in their forties. I can't figure out what happened.

Couldn't have put it better!!

Oldest grand daughters...twins...are well over 14. Youngest is two and a half months. Same now 49 year old dad/son.

[JohnR]

Patience, Grasshopper!

The first time I said that to my now 15 YO daughter, I had to take some time to 'splain. :D

Yup, I made her watch the pilot episode. Now she's enlightened.

[Bawanna]

Some of you fella's here are older than dirt. I'm hoping for longevity myself hoping to make 60. 8 months to go, my confidence is dwindling.

[Barth]

Guess I'll be a grandpa in about 6 months.

I've been a grandpa for seven years three times over old man LOL!
When folks start to notice I'm not aging it's time to move...

[rjt123]

I reach the half century mark in 9 days.


I'll get there in mid-October. How the hell did I get old?!?

[JohnR]

I went ahead and joined AMAC a few days early. Might get some old fart discounts.

[rjt123]

I went ahead and joined AMAC a few days early. Might get some old fart discounts.


Is AMAC a non-liberal/Commie version of AARP?

[wyntrout]

AARP is a Liberal/Leftist/Socialist organization interested in promoting itself and making money. They promote Obama and his agenda.

AMAC is a counter-organization that promotes CONSERVATIVE values. It's patriotic and reflects my views... American Liberty and people being really free and responsible for themselves and their actions. Conservatives aren't looking for FREE STUFF... just FREEDOM to live their lives unfettered by politicians who would take all of their money and give it to freeloaders to buy their votes.

I joined it over a year ago and paid for 5 years up front.

Our forefathers came to this continent to to get away from oppressive government and our constitution was written to LIMIT the GOVERNMENT and leave the PEOPLE FREE.

Wynn:)

[wyntrout]

We still get lots of mail from AARP. I welcome it because I know that that's more money down the drain for them. I enjoy tearing their crap up and throwing it away. Let them waste their money!

Wynn:D

[kwh]

Happy Birthday to me today. AARP MEDICARE. Grandfather. KAHR CW380 CM9 CW 45

[muggsy]

Some of you fella's here are older than dirt. I'm hoping for longevity myself hoping to make 60. 8 months to go, my confidence is dwindling.

You've been ridden hard and put away wet, but there's still a lot of livin in you. I've heard that no one ever dies until they have paid for all of their indiscretions. Old Jocko just may live forever. I wish you well old paint.

[TheTman]

An 8 year old boy found a $20 bill on the parking lot of a Crackr Barrel restaurant. He then saw a soldier coming in, and decided to buy the soldiers lunch. His own father had been killed in the war, and he wanted to do something for the Soldier. He wrote a note and wrapped it around the $20,

“Dear Soldier — my dad was a soldier. He’s in heaven now,” the note said. “I found this 20 dollars in the parking lot when we got here. We like to pay it forward in my family. It’s your lucky day! Thank you for your service. Myles Eckert, a gold star kid.”
http://www.theblaze.com/stories/2014/03/02/the-incredible-thing-an-8-year-old-boy-did-for-a-soldier-will-be-remembered-for-a-lifetime/

[JohnR]

Saw that this morning just before the TV screen started to go all fuzzy.

[wyntrout]

The same happened to me yesterday! Someone posted the link on Facebook.

Wynn:D

[Planedude]

You raise them right and that's going to happen...


My "baby boy" is 25 and has blessed me with two Grandsons one three, the other three months.
The youngest has had a rough go as of late. Caught Whooping cough, then RSV and spent 5 days in the children's hospital trying to beat it. Scary thing is, all of here are old enough to remember a time when being that ill at 3months would have claimed him. Thank God for a good Doc and the blessing of caring nurses.


Oh! and which one of you pukes turned off the heat?? It was in the upper seventy's yesterday and we were enjoying a beer, relaxing in the rockers on the front porch. Now its twenty three degrees and snowing... Yeash!

[W5JCK]

Just turned 56 on Feb 9. So sorta old fart now. My brain thinks I'm still young, but my body knows better and makes sure I know it too every day!

Planedude, yep we went from 70s last night to 20° at 4:30pm today with light snow and sleet. Somebody needs to shoot that darn wascally rodent in PA.

[JohnR]

Sounds like Florida. My brain thinks I'm 25 when young hotties are around. Then my other brain reminds me I'm just a dirty old man.

[ltxi]

Some of you fella's here are older than dirt. I'm hoping for longevity myself hoping to make 60. 8 months to go, my confidence is dwindling.

I doubt you be gonna make it.

[Alfonse]

Some of you fella's here are older than dirt. I'm hoping for longevity myself hoping to make 60. 8 months to go, my confidence is dwindling.

If you decide you need to get rid of some guns, because your time is nigh, I would help out a friend and all. But, you'll probably outlast me anyway. Difference is, I am not worried about it. :)

[GROTMAN]

I'm still a young 58 but occasionally find my mind writes checks my body can't cash! :(

[yqtszhj]

I'll get there in mid-October. How the hell did I get old?!?

I can answer that one, you ain't dead yet. :D

I hit it last year and the only difference I notice is I tolerate BS a whole lot less than I did in my 40's.

[MW surveyor]

At the doctor's yesterday (yes, I'm still alive and doing good) for a "wellness" exam. Doctor was asking questions regarding depression, did I want to be resuscitated, intubed, tube fed and other fun things and then asked..........................."do you have guns in your house?" I told her that the question had nothing to do with the state of my health and declined to answer. Her reply was pretty good "Yeah, Obama care, they can't ask that question directly so they have to get the health care providers to do it for them."

Sorry to be a downer in this happy-go-lucky thread. :( I'm getting just about sick of this crap.

BTW - Bawanna, you'll make it to 60 no problem.

[Bawanna]

Wellness exams suck. I was feeling fine until I did that a couple weeks ago myself, numbers off, gotta see a specialist, yadda yadda yadda. Only reason I even went was they wouldn't renew my prescriptions without a check up. They got a brand new fancy building. Probably need my money to make the payments.

My doctor has never asked about guns yet. I almost look forward to it.

[getsome]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p53kJX64ieQ

[RevRay]

I had my annual VA check-up last month & was fully expecting someone to pop the question but no one ever did.

Speaking of which, though, I've worked up an answer, so tell me what you think of it ...

Doctor: Do you have guns in your house?

Me: What do you mean guns? Do you mean like a pellet gun to shoot squirrels with? No, I don't have a gun to shoot squirrels with ... but whenever I do need to shoot squirrels I borrow one from a friend's son. I shot about 15 squirrels last summer. I've been thinking about buying one of my own, but no, I don't have one right now.

Which is all true by the way ... I don't own a pellet gun, but I do borrow one when I need to shoot squirrels.

[RRP]

Two visits per year and that question has never been asked.

[MW surveyor]

Might be that you have to be on Medicare to get the question? I was never asked this question before I turned 65 and went on Medicare.

RevRay - might just work.

[GROTMAN]

A man and a woman were having a quiet, romantic dinner in a fine restaurant. They were gazing lovingly at each other and holding hands.

The waitress, taking another order at a table a few steps away, suddenly noticed the woman slowly sliding down her chair and under the table - but the man stared straight ahead.

The waitress, thinking this behavior a bit risqué and worried that it might offend other diners, went over to the table and, tactfully, began by saying to the man "Pardon me, sir, but I think your wife just slid under the table"

The man calmly looked up at her and said, "No, she didn't. She just walked in."

[bob98366]

My doctor has never asked about guns yet. I almost look forward to it.

Being retired military I am still allowed to use the local Naval Hospital. Never been asked yet about guns. Since doc is a young Navy Lieutenant, if he ever asks about guns, I think I'll tell him guns are aboard warships in turrets so no I don't have any.

[Bawanna]

That should work good.

[JohnR]

Never been asked, but my answer will be, "No."

[muggsy]

Sounds like Florida. My brain thinks I'm 25 when young hotties are around. Then my other brain reminds me I'm just a dirty old man.

Before I came into my great wealth I too, was a dirty old man. Now I'm an earthy senior citizen. :)

[muggsy]

I can answer that one, you ain't dead yet. :D

I hit it last year and the only difference I notice is I tolerate BS a whole lot less than I did in my 40's.

Amen, brother. My BS tolerance level is near zero. :)

[muggsy]

When my doctor asks me if I have any guns I going to say, "Sure, would you like to see the one I'm carrying now?" That should put him in his place. :)

[Bawanna]

Actually on more than one occasion when he actually had to touch me he had a pretty good pile of knives and guns on the visitor chair. Maybe that's why he didn't ask? He already knows?

All that's changed now of course, I only carry one knife on my belt anymore.

[berettabone]

During a checkup visit, my doctor asked me to lay down on the table, so he could prod and poke................right before that, I said, " Wait a minute, before you proceed, I have a firearm in my pocket." " I know they have signs prohibiting this, but I just forgot." (lie) He said, " Oh, I don't care." and laughed. He then proceeded to tell me about his camping trips, and how he should probably be armed, and was thinking about an XD. I told him about the recall, of which he wasn't aware.

[Bawanna]

I don't think we have any signs. I never really looked very hard though. Also wouldn't make a bit of difference. The hospitals usually have signs but I don't look for those either and also make no difference.

[GROTMAN]

Especially liked the last one :)
PRESBYTERIAN:
When you rearrange the letters:
BEST IN PRAYER

ASTRONOMER:
When you rearrange the letters:
MOON STARER

DESPERATION:

When you rearrange the letters:
A ROPE ENDS IT

THE EYES:
When you rearrange the letters:
THEY SEE

GEORGE BUSH:
When you rearrange the letters:
HE BUGS GORE

THE MORSE CODE:
When you rearrange the letters:
HERE COME DOTS


DORMITORY:
When you rearrange the letters:
DIRTY ROOM


SLOT MACHINES:
When you rearrange the letters:
CASH LOST IN ME

ANIMOSITY:
When you rearrange the letters:
IS NO AMITY

ELECTION RESULTS:
When you rearrange the letters:
LIES - LET'S RECOUNT

SNOOZE ALARMS:
When you rearrange the letters:
ALAS! NO MORE Z 'S

A DECIMAL POINT:
When you rearrange the letters:
I'M A DOT IN PLACE

THE EARTHQUAKES:
When you rearrange the letters:
THAT http://www.ncgunowners.com/forum/images/smilies/censored.gif SHAKE

ELEVEN PLUS TWO:
When you rearrange the letters:
TWELVE PLUS ONE



AND FINALLY...

FOR THE GRAND FINALE:



*PRESIDENT BARACK OBAMA

When you rearrange the letters:

"An Arab Backed Imposter"

[Barth]

I'm looking to change my luck this month.
Attempting to change jobs and survive to retirement.

Looking to KahrTalk to wish me luck in this endeavor.
This situation is staring to gel.
But positive thoughts from the board would be appreciated.

Thanks...

[Bawanna]

Your wish is my desire. Positive thoughts thought and directed your way.

May the force be with you.

[JohnR]

Good luck, Barth!

[RevRay]

I tried to get real clever with Barth's Change and rearrange the letters, but I wasn't up to the task ... so I'll just say that I hope your plans go well.

[b4uqzme]

Good Luck Barth!

A good friend and I came to the realization that we couldn't stop growing old....so we made a pact to stay immature. Seems to be working. :p

[Alfonse]

Of course you get best wishes from the board, and from me! From what I've seen you write about on here, you seem capable of doing anything. Good luck!

[bob98366]

Barth, you'll do great! Good luck and give it your best.

[wyntrout]

Good Luck!

Wynn:)

[Tilos]

We still get lots of mail from AARP. I welcome it because I know that that's more money down the drain for them. I enjoy tearing their crap up and throwing it away. Let them waste their money!

Wynn:D
I tear it up too
but then put it in the return envelop they sent...and send it back:madgrin::yo:
:rolleyes:

[Tinman507]

Good Luck Barth!

[Barth]

Thanks everybody!

[jlottmc]

Being retired military I am still allowed to use the local Naval Hospital. Never been asked yet about guns. Since doc is a young Navy Lieutenant, if he ever asks about guns, I think I'll tell him guns are aboard warships in turrets so no I don't have any.

Similar thought, we were taught that anything with a bore over 1 inch was a gun. Again I have no guns.

[wyntrout]

You see all too often that a rifle salute incorrectly called a 21-Gun Salute, which, of course is reserved for HEADS of STATE... and the bores are more than a few inches.

Wynn:D

[RevRay]

I tear it (AARP propaganda) up too ... but then put it in the return envelop they sent...and send it back:madgrin::yo::rolleyes:

I never heard of that idea before, I like it.

[JohnR]

I just got the AARP letter today. Threw it in the trash.

[TheTman]

I posted this little video on Politics, but thought maybe it deserved more exposure. A football coach in Tennessee was fired over writing and performing this song over it's anti-Obama theme. If the mods feel it's out of place please delete it, with my apologies. I thought it was too cool of a song to hide in the Politics section.


http://video.staged.com/dtglobal59/tennessee_football_coach_fired_for_making_obama_so

[Tinman507]

Don't know where you all stand on Fracking. Lots of it going on here in PA.
This Video puts it in perspective.

Il-M6B_-a_U

[Bawanna]

Subject: How To Start Each Day With A Positive Outlook:

1. Open a new file in your computer.

2. Name it 'Barack Obama'.

3. Send it to the Recycle Bin.

4. Empty the Recycle Bin.

5. Your PC will ask you: 'Do you really want to get rid of 'Barack Obama?'

6. Firmly Click 'YES.'

7. Feel better?

GOOD - Tomorrow we'll do Nancy Pelosi.

[GROTMAN]

http://lolsnaps.com/upload_pic/Irishhandcuffs-8510.jpg (http://lolsnaps.com/news/94148/0/)

[Barth]

Subject: How To Start Each Day With A Positive Outlook:

1. Open a new file in your computer.

2. Name it 'Barack Obama'.

3. Send it to the Recycle Bin.

4. Empty the Recycle Bin.

5. Your PC will ask you: 'Do you really want to get rid of 'Barack Obama?'

6. Firmly Click 'YES.'

7. Feel better?

GOOD - Tomorrow we'll do Nancy Pelosi.

I feel better already!
You're a good man Bawanna.

[DeaconKC]

In honor of St Patrick's Day:

Mickey and Seamus' ship had sunk, leaving them in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean in a lifeboat. With nothing to do, they were looking under the seats when Mickey found an old beat up lantern. With nothing to lose, he rubbed the lamp and a tiny puff of smoke came out. Finally an old, wrinkled up Genie slowly crawled out of the lamp and said "I'm old, tired and worn out. I only have one wish left, so make it a good one." Mickey piped up and said "I want you to turn the whole ocean into Guinness Beer!" The Genie says "Okay" and vanishes, leaving floating on an ocean of beer. Seamus reaches over and slaps Mickey upside of his head. "Now, what did you go and do that for?" cries Mickey. Seamus looks at him and says "You bloody fool! Now we've got to pee in the boat!"

[GROTMAN]

Anyone have a good caption for this ? :D
https://fbcdn-sphotos-e-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-prn1/t1.0-9/48136_10152048885163721_1447601845_n.jpg

[JohnR]

Catwoman at her first Appleseed event

[Tinman507]

Does this Barrett make my ass look big?

[Bawanna]

Damn I love those boots, they'd go so well with my.......oh never mind.

[Bawanna]

Kind a like long johns with the trap door left down, must be kind of breezy me thinks.

[yqtszhj]

I want to start going to that shooting range.

[Alfonse]

I don't think there is anything to say.

[Ol'coot]

I would bet she is a "crack shot", Just saying!

[getsome]

It's easy, just sight right down the V

[GLOCKROCKER]

I'd have one helluva time being the spotter!:p

[GROTMAN]

Kinda pulls at the ole heart strings a little..:o
BAGPIPES AT A FUNERAL

As a bagpiper , I play many gigs. Recently I was asked by a funeral
director to play at a graveside service for a homeless man. He had no family or
friends, so the service was to be held at a pauper's cemetery in the
Kentucky back country.

As I was familiar with the backwoods , I got lost and , being a typical
man, I didn't stop to ask for directions.

I finally arrived an hour late and saw the funeral guy had evidently gone
and the hearse was nowhere in sight. There were only the diggers and crew
left and they were eating lunch.

I felt badly and apologized to the men for being late. I went to the side
of the grave and looked down. The vault lid was already in place. I didn't
know what else to do , so I started to play.

The workers put down their lunches and began to gather around. I played
out my heart and soul for this man with no family and friends. Played like I
never played before for this homeless man.

And , as I played " Amazing Grace," the workers began to weep. They wept.
I wept. We all wept together. When I finished , I packed up my bagpipes and
started for my car. Though my head hung low, my heart was full.

As I opened the door to my car, I heard one of the workers say , " I never
seen nothin' like that before and I've been putting in septic tanks for
twenty years." :D

[RevRay]

If you haven't seen this already somewhere else, you should check it out, it's pretty cool.

http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=TpaQYSd75Ak

[RevRay]

Went to the range with a friend today with my MK9 & E9 & Makarov .380. It was a warm day ... finally ... which made it extra enjoyable. I shot mostly reloads in all three guns and not one problem of any kind with any of the pistols. But then that's what I expected. I recently purchased (on Gunbroker) a barely-used 30-year-old Walther PPK/S .380 by Interarms, which I am hoping to receive sometime in the next week or so. I'm looking forward to taking it to the range soon afterwards. It is nice to see the winter finally starting to disappear ... sort of ... so hopefully there will more range days more often for the next 7-8 months.

[GROTMAN]

Another fine example of gun safety at work ..:rolleyes:
http://i.imgur.com/2WojKJP.gif

[TheTman]

Senior Texting
An elderly couple had just learned how to send text messages on their cell phones.

The wife was a romantic type and the husband was more of a no-nonsense guy.

One afternoon the wife went out to meet a friend for coffee. While waiting for her friend, she decided to send her husband a romantic text message and she wrote:

"If you are sleeping, send me your dreams.
If you are laughing, send me your smile.
If you are eating, send me a bite.
If you are drinking, send me a sip.
If you are crying, send me your tears.
I love you."

The husband texted back to her:

"I'm on the toilet....... Please advise."

[yqtszhj]

If you haven't seen this already somewhere else, you should check it out, it's pretty cool.

http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=TpaQYSd75Ak

That was pretty cool.

I don't speak Italian but I believe the guy that was picked to be her coach had the winning line when he said something like they'ed be the "devil and the Saint."

[Grizwold]

We still get lots of mail from AARP. I welcome it because I know that that's more money down the drain for them. I enjoy tearing their crap up and throwing it away. Let them waste their money!

Wynn:D
Send it back in their postage paid envelopes.


(oops--didn't read the whole thread--already suggested:o)

[Bawanna]

Just got this in an email. I loved it. It is an actual sign posted just on the Idaho side bordering Washington.

Kind of inviting to me.

[jocko]

wheres Idaho?? Just sayin

[jocko]

colonel, I do want u to know I sure feel for the washington state residents who have lost their lives with this mudslide. Knowng many will never be found in all thatmud when it finally drys up. Just so sad to even visulize this happening. I hope none of ur redneck friends were swalowed up in this sh!t. jUST SAD

Ol jocko who does hae a heart and it is not always ON EITHER.

[Bawanna]

It's a bad deal for sure and not looking well for the rest on the missing list, although they are still actively searching very hard. Now it's raining hard again too, has to make it that much more difficult.

I feel very fortunate. My wife was working her banquet job for a mans 80th birthday party with in a mile this side of that slide.

Fate! Sad for the people driving along that highway in the wrong place at the wrong time and just gone.

Tremendous amount of support for the whole community up there for the displaced and the family members of the missing and deceased.

One of my violet co workers, nicest and prettiest of the bunch lives about 5 miles from it. Kind of close to home.

[jocko]

JUST HARD TO FATHM HOW PEOPLE COUD NOT HAVE GOTTEN OUT IN TIME buthere in Indiana, our talles hillis 20- feet. A mudslide here kills a dozen ground hogs. I reall do feel for those people. Ur wife was indeed lucky, I guess she deserves some luck cosidering!!!!!! Just sayin

[jocko]

Just think 200 years from now they will be building new homes in that area and they will think they cae across some mass grave site.

[Bawanna]

A big shout out to Melissa. You need to check in like you promised.

I tried to do some upgrading on the website you created for me long ago and I'm stuck. BIG SURPRISE there huh?

I'm sure your getting ready for some more shooting games soon as the weather gets a bit more tolerable.

[yqtszhj]

New Safety Restraint.

[wyntrout]

Dang! I want a "LIKE" button!

Wynn:D

[GROTMAN]

This little boy don't need no gun. :)
http://i1276.photobucket.com/albums/y462/staffpicks/Animated_GIFs/dragon_vs_baby.gif

[Bawanna]

Rough customer ain't he?

[jeepster09]

Anyone have a good caption for this ? :D
https://fbcdn-sphotos-e-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-prn1/t1.0-9/48136_10152048885163721_1447601845_n.jpg


Melissa....at range day?:amflag: