View Full Version : January jollies
340pd
01-01-2021, 09:37 AM
17299
Bawanna
01-01-2021, 10:39 AM
That's plenty sexy alright. Love to have one of them in a holster.
I messed up and watched Quigley the other night, now the burning desire for a Sharps is back worse than ever, never ends, the wants.
JohnR
01-01-2021, 07:03 PM
If I get my $600 deposit I’ll have the January Jollies. But I can’t think of what gun to spend it on.
wyntrout
01-01-2021, 07:30 PM
My wife and I got our $600 each on the 31st. Since we pay taxes, I feel that we got a little of our money back. We chose to use all available funds and pay off our car loan almost 3 years early, so it's nice to have a little something in the bank again. I have to start getting a couple of dental implants in February and this will help.
I would rather our country not be going into so much debt, but if they're going to throw our tax money around and print more money, I appreciate what they throw our way, instead of all of it going to foreign countries... some who hate us! And all of those add-ons the Dems piled onto the "stimulus bill for such crazy things! :(
JohnR
01-01-2021, 07:46 PM
I don’t think of it as money, I think of it as control. They’re buying us; buying our consent.
getsome
01-01-2021, 07:59 PM
Agree x1000...Every single cent of the stimulus money should go to Americans who have lost jobs and businesses due to the China plague and not one penny to countries like Sudan who will receive 35 million for “Gender Studies”.....This is almost a trillion dollar package and we will have to borrow the money from China and pay it back with interest because of their negligence in not controlling the kill virus they lab created and let go on the world.....
JohnR
01-01-2021, 08:22 PM
The Gov has no intention of paying it back. That’s become obvious to me.
Armybrat
01-03-2021, 11:36 AM
The Presbyterian church called a meeting to decide what to do about their squirrel infestation. After much prayer and consideration, they concluded that the squirrels were predestined to be there, and they should not interfere with God’s divine will.
At the Baptist church, the squirrels had taken an interest in the baptistry. The deacons met and decided to put a water-slide on the baptistry and let the squirrels drown themselves. The squirrels liked the slide and, unfortunately, knew instinctively how to swim, so twice as many squirrels showed up the following week.
The Lutheran church decided that they were not in a position to harm any of God’s creatures. So, they humanely trapped their squirrels and set them free near the Baptist church. Two weeks later, the squirrels were back when the Baptists took down the water-slide.
The Episcopalians tried a much more unique path by setting out pans of whiskey around their church in an effort to kill the squirrels with alcohol poisoning. They sadly learned how much damage a band of drunk squirrels can do.
But the Catholic church came up with a more creative strategy! They baptized all the squirrels and made them members of the church. Now they only see them at Christmas and Easter.
Not much was heard from the Jewish synagogue. They took the first squirrel and circumcised him. They haven’t seen a squirrel since.
yqtszhj
01-03-2021, 12:55 PM
Good one Armybrat.
wyntrout
01-04-2021, 12:15 PM
Lucille decided to give herself a big treat for her 70th birthday by staying overnight in a really nice hotel.. When she checked out the next morning, the desk clerk handed her a bill for $250.00.
She demanded to know why the charge was so high "I agree it's a nice hotel, but the rooms aren't worth $250..00 for just an overnight stay - I didn't even have breakfast!"
The clerk told her that $250.00 is the 'standard rate,' and breakfast had been included had she wanted it.
She insisted on speaking to the Manager. The Manager appeared and, forewarned by the desk clerk, announced: "This hotel has an Olympic-sized pool and a huge conference center which are available for use."
"But I didn't use them."
'Well, they are here, and you could have." He went on to explain that she could also have seen one of the in-hotel shows for which they were so famous."We have the best entertainers from the world over performing here."
"But I didn't go to any of those shows.."
"Well, we have them, and you could have."
No matter what amenity the Manager mentioned, she replied, "But I didn't use it!" and the Manager countered with his standard response.
After several minutes discussion, and with the Manager still unmoved, she decided to pay, wrote a check and gave it to him. The Manager was surprised when he looked at the check.
"But Madam, this check is for only $50.00"
"That's correct I charged you $200.00 for sleeping with me."
"But I didn't!"
"Well, too bad, I was here, and you could have."
JohnR
01-04-2021, 12:40 PM
Lol!
340pd
01-04-2021, 02:57 PM
17303
340pd
01-06-2021, 08:02 AM
17304
340pd
01-06-2021, 08:03 AM
17305
340pd
01-06-2021, 08:03 AM
17306
dustnchips
01-06-2021, 11:04 AM
https://scontent-ort2-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-0/s640x640/133735134_930080554428613_2162223068733546720_o.jp g?_nc_cat=104&ccb=2&_nc_sid=730e14&_nc_ohc=9DhaoO6RSlYAX-SLhxa&_nc_oc=AQlURSqN-Nlh-XevQa_-i20mdFIDCmvMiQdpDlhlcHzWJ-pES2Yei96cMLbdjVUIdjk&_nc_ht=scontent-ort2-1.xx&tp=7&oh=7275c14af53f785451b27b55aa20f3e5&oe=601B77F6
yqtszhj
01-06-2021, 03:21 PM
https://scontent-ort2-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-0/s640x640/133735134_930080554428613_2162223068733546720_o.jp g?_nc_cat=104&ccb=2&_nc_sid=730e14&_nc_ohc=9DhaoO6RSlYAX-SLhxa&_nc_oc=AQlURSqN-Nlh-XevQa_-i20mdFIDCmvMiQdpDlhlcHzWJ-pES2Yei96cMLbdjVUIdjk&_nc_ht=scontent-ort2-1.xx&tp=7&oh=7275c14af53f785451b27b55aa20f3e5&oe=601B77F6
Now that’s funny.
wyntrout
01-06-2021, 10:15 PM
Wow! It took a few reads to figure the "fusion" out, but, yes... been there done that myself! :D
340pd
01-07-2021, 09:38 AM
17307
340pd
01-09-2021, 09:26 AM
17310
Armybrat
01-09-2021, 10:21 AM
...
getsome
01-09-2021, 07:27 PM
For the life of me I just don’t understand women....Night before last was cold, rainy and nasty so when I came home the wife had a big pot of chili on the stove and cornbread cooking in the oven which was smelling great, man I tell you what, fat girls know how to cook, might be a connection there but I digress....Anyway after she cleaned up the kitchen and went to bed I thought maybe I would do something real special to thank her so I printed out a big picture of her and put it on the refrigerator and under it I put the words “Employee of the Month” which I thought she would appreciate but apparently not since this will be my second night sleeping on the couch which ain’t bad, smells a little like the dog but I got the big screen TV and it is closer to the fridge to get another beer and so far so good but I do miss my pillow.....Women, you just can’t please um....
wyntrout
01-10-2021, 12:16 PM
17312
jeepster09
01-10-2021, 01:50 PM
.....
getsome
01-10-2021, 08:26 PM
Kinda sounds like the Dem’s wondering where all the money went for the Green New Deal and all their other progressive programs for clean energy so we can stop all the drilling....
Armybrat
01-11-2021, 10:18 AM
Most of it was given to Wall Street banks.
JohnR
01-11-2021, 12:33 PM
Most of it was given to Wall Street banks.
Who, in turn, donated it to politicians.
Armybrat
01-11-2021, 09:33 PM
Yep.
Goldman Sachs gotta keep that cash flow flood moving.
getsome
01-11-2021, 09:59 PM
I'm still waiting on the $600.00 they said was coming, I really don't need it or expect to ever see a check but it might come in handy next year when my income taxes more than triple ...I figure they should call it a 90% interest payday loan rather than Covid stimulus.....
Armybrat
01-12-2021, 01:56 PM
We got both ours weeks ago. Just sent it back as part of our quarterly payent.
Armybrat
01-12-2021, 01:57 PM
...
getsome
01-12-2021, 08:39 PM
I’d like to congratulate The Ohio State Buckeyes football team for their fantastic comeback victory in last nights NCAA Football Championship Game over The Alabama Crimson Tide.....I know it looked like Alabama had gone up 52 to 24 when time ran out and everyone was sure they had the win in the bag when we went to bed but somehow amazingly enough at about 4am Ohio State was able to score 5 more touchdowns and was officially declared National Champions with a final score of 59 to 52......Unfortunately the game film of Ohio State scoring 35 points in the wee hours of Tuesday morning has been lost......They are rioting in Tuscaloosa and ESPN is calling them sore losers and demanding that Nick Saban be permanently removed as head coach......
^^^ Man, where's the Like button. I want to push it now!
jeepster09
01-13-2021, 08:21 AM
The Hooker's Union
A dedicated Teamsters union worker was attending a convention in Las Vegas and decided to check out the local brothels.
When he got to the first one, he asked the Madam, "Is this a union house?"
"No," she replied, "I'm sorry it isn't."
"Well, if I pay you $100, what cut do the girls get?"
"The house gets $60 and the girls get $40," she answered.
Offended at such unfair dealings, the union man stomped off down the street in search of a more equitable, hopefully unionized shop.
His search continued until finally he reached a brothel where the Madam responded, "Why yes sir, this is a union house. We observe all union rules."
The man asked, "And, if I pay you $100, what cut do the girls get?"
"The girls get $80 and the house gets $20."
"That's more like it!" the union man said.
He handed the Madam $100, looked around the room, and pointed to a stunningly attractive blue-eyed blonde.
"I'd like her," he said. "I'm sure you would, sir," said the Madam. Then she gestured to a 80 year old woman in the corner, "but Nancy here has 40 years seniority and according to union rules, she's next."
Armybrat
01-13-2021, 09:48 AM
I’d like to congratulate The Ohio State Buckeyes football team for their fantastic comeback victory in last nights NCAA Football Championship Game over The Alabama Crimson Tide.....I know it looked like Alabama had gone up 52 to 24 when time ran out and everyone was sure they had the win in the bag when we went to bed but somehow amazingly enough at about 4am Ohio State was able to score 5 more touchdowns and was officially declared National Champions with a final score of 59 to 52......Unfortunately the game film of Ohio State scoring 35 points in the wee hours of Tuesday morning has been lost......They are rioting in Tuscaloosa and ESPN is calling them sore losers and demanding that Nick Saban be permanently removed as head coach......
Brilliant! ;)
Armybrat
01-13-2021, 09:50 AM
The Hooker's Union
A dedicated Teamsters union worker was attending a convention in Las Vegas and decided to check out the local brothels.
When he got to the first one, he asked the Madam, "Is this a union house?"
"No," she replied, "I'm sorry it isn't."
"Well, if I pay you $100, what cut do the girls get?"
"The house gets $60 and the girls get $40," she answered.
Offended at such unfair dealings, the union man stomped off down the street in search of a more equitable, hopefully unionized shop.
His search continued until finally he reached a brothel where the Madam responded, "Why yes sir, this is a union house. We observe all union rules."
The man asked, "And, if I pay you $100, what cut do the girls get?"
"The girls get $80 and the house gets $20."
"That's more like it!" the union man said.
He handed the Madam $100, looked around the room, and pointed to a stunningly attractive blue-eyed blonde.
"I'd like her," he said. "I'm sure you would, sir," said the Madam. Then she gestured to a 80 year old woman in the corner, "but Nancy here has 40 years seniority and according to union rules, she's next."
Likewise!
jeepster09
01-13-2021, 05:52 PM
Bubba's New Truck
One day, Jimmy Joe was walking down Main Street, when he saw his buddy Bubba driving a brand new pickup.
Bubba pulled up to him with a wide grin.
"Bubba, where'd you get that truck?" asked Jimmy Joe.
"Bobby Sue gave it to me," Bubba replied.
"She gave it to you? I knew she was kinda sweet on ya, but a new truck?"
"Well, Jimmy Joe, let me tell you what happened. We were driving out on County Road 6, in the middle of nowhere. Bobby Sue pulled off the road, put the truck in 4-wheel drive, and headed into the woods. She parked the truck, got out, threw off all her clothes and said, 'Bubba, take whatever you want."
"So I took the truck!"
"Bubba, you're a smart man! Them clothes woulda' never fit you..."
yqtszhj
01-14-2021, 06:57 AM
Bubba's New Truck
One day, Jimmy Joe was walking down Main Street, when he saw his buddy Bubba driving a brand new pickup.
Bubba pulled up to him with a wide grin.
"Bubba, where'd you get that truck?" asked Jimmy Joe.
"Bobby Sue gave it to me," Bubba replied.
"She gave it to you? I knew she was kinda sweet on ya, but a new truck?"
"Well, Jimmy Joe, let me tell you what happened. We were driving out on County Road 6, in the middle of nowhere. Bobby Sue pulled off the road, put the truck in 4-wheel drive, and headed into the woods. She parked the truck, got out, threw off all her clothes and said, 'Bubba, take whatever you want."
"So I took the truck!"
"Bubba, you're a smart man! Them clothes woulda' never fit you..."
Thats a good one.
Armybrat
01-18-2021, 01:13 PM
...
dustnchips
01-18-2021, 05:24 PM
https://scontent-mia3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/48944747_768190930180633_3339663915356258304_n.jpg ?_nc_cat=111&ccb=2&_nc_sid=8bfeb9&_nc_ohc=EzEOXdIfHMUAX89iTPi&_nc_ht=scontent-mia3-1.xx&oh=aa4ac9c1622e0f3b9b5088a51974941a&oe=602B8401
Bawanna
01-18-2021, 06:34 PM
Wonder why I can never see dustnchips post. I just get a little picture of a page.
Won't open no matter what I do. Don't think I'm blocking or ignoring anybody.
JohnR
01-18-2021, 06:36 PM
I can see it...
SlowBurn
01-19-2021, 09:06 AM
Wonder why I can never see dustnchips post. I just get a little picture of a page.
Won't open no matter what I do. Don't think I'm blocking or ignoring anybody.
Speaking of not seeing, I tried clicking on the website in your signature - nada
Bawanna
01-19-2021, 09:42 AM
I'm trying to sort that out, for some reason it's shut down. Can't get into it my self. I best remove that from my signature until I get it figured out.
wyntrout
01-19-2021, 10:52 AM
Links in your signature aren't active. That's been around for a LONG time.
340pd
01-20-2021, 08:43 AM
17336
340pd
01-20-2021, 08:44 AM
Thanks President Trump for a great four years.
17337
skiflydive
01-20-2021, 09:56 AM
Thanks President Trump for a great four years.
17337
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ ++++++++++
Armybrat
01-20-2021, 04:45 PM
....
yqtszhj
01-20-2021, 07:57 PM
Like!!!!
getsome
01-20-2021, 08:15 PM
Yep +1000.....I really hope he left Joe a little surprise in his new chair.
Bawanna
01-20-2021, 08:17 PM
Hopefully he took one of the wheels off so it wobbles.
Canine Dave
01-20-2021, 08:33 PM
1/20/21
That's a palindrome.
....
Wouldn't it be great if that was actually the letter that Trump left for him in the Oval Office?
wyntrout
01-21-2021, 01:02 PM
Funny!
Armybrat
01-24-2021, 05:09 PM
......
Bawanna
01-24-2021, 07:33 PM
So does Steven Segal and Tom Selleck.
Armybrat
01-24-2021, 09:09 PM
.....
King Rat
01-25-2021, 01:13 PM
https://i.imgur.com/go5vw53.jpg?2
King Rat
01-26-2021, 10:04 AM
https://i.imgur.com/i26Op01.jpg?1https://i.imgur.com/TqvoNn8.jpg?1
Armybrat
01-26-2021, 01:03 PM
........
Bawanna
01-26-2021, 08:08 PM
I liked Klinger, rather not associate him/her with the Biden corporation.
You beat me to it Colonel. Cpl. Klinger was a stand up guy.
getsome
01-26-2021, 08:53 PM
I always liked Klinger too, he was a straight man who found himself in a very horrible place, in a war that was impossible to win and who was willing to do anything, even dressing as a very hairy woman to get back to the greatest, most perfect country in the world VS Uncle “you know the thing” Joe Biden who is now, somehow President of the greatest country on this planet and who seems to be bound and determined to turn It into the chit hole that Klinger was so desperate to escape.....
dustnchips
01-27-2021, 06:28 AM
I like Klinger to. No matter what else he did, he always did his job. I still like the post though.
Armybrat
01-27-2021, 08:05 AM
I always liked Klinger too, he was a straight man who found himself in a very horrible place, in a war that was impossible to win and who was willing to do anything, even dressing as a very hairy woman to get back to the greatest, most perfect country in the world VS Uncle “you know the thing” Joe Biden who is now, somehow President of the greatest country on this planet and who seems to be bound and determined to turn It into the chit hole that Klinger was so desperate to escape.....
From Wikipedia:
“After his role in the 1955 film Blackboard Jungle, he entered the United States Army for two years, serving overseas in Japan and Korea. His service in Korea was after the hostilities had ended.[9] In his M*A*S*H role as Max Klinger, he can be seen wearing his actual U.S. Army-issued dog tags.“
Planedude
01-27-2021, 04:41 PM
Pretty Garand...
Peace
wyntrout
01-27-2021, 05:48 PM
Ha!
Armybrat
01-27-2021, 08:25 PM
...
Armybrat
01-29-2021, 09:39 AM
...
Armybrat
01-29-2021, 09:54 AM
....
King Rat
01-29-2021, 11:40 AM
https://i.imgur.com/Wwe6wUu.jpg?1
King Rat
01-29-2021, 12:40 PM
Even CNN hates CNN
By now I sure most of you know Project Veritas. The People that go hidden to find the truth. Bet ya did not know that even CNN employer's hate the Constant bashing. Watch the video.
https://www.projectveritas.com/news/exposecnnpart1/
<a href="https://imgur.com/dfKlUgJ"><img src="https://i.imgur.com/dfKlUgJ.jpg?1" title="source: imgur.com" /></a>
King Rat
01-29-2021, 12:41 PM
Even CNN hates CNN
By now I sure most of you know Project Veritas. The People that go hidden to find the truth. Bet ya did not know that even CNN employer's hate the Constant bashing. Watch the video.
https://www.projectveritas.com/news/exposecnnpart1/
https://i.imgur.com/dfKlUgJ.jpg?1
<a href="https://imgur.com/dfKlUgJ"><img src="https://i.imgur.com/dfKlUgJ.jpg?1" title="source: imgur.com" /></a>
340pd
01-30-2021, 11:19 AM
17362
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